healing TRIGGER WARNING !!
For this character:

If you are not comfortable with suicidal themes, mentions of self-harm, doing things without consent, torture, graphic themes, sexual mentions of any kind, etc, please be wary when reading anything I write, especially on this page, because there is a possibility that these things will be brought up in other character pages or some of my other writing.

I don't necessarily go into depth in any of these topics, but they are mentioned, some more than others.

 
account_box Introduction
A quick summary

My name is Jake Grey, last name Satori if you want to count that... I work with others like me to get rid of certain people and hunt down those who have escaped Theosophus.
We'are on a contract to work on the tougher cases that most won't or can't do... the impossible jobs if you will.
Nexus thinks us something along the lines of a weapon and shield for them, but who knows, I don't really question much anymore― there's not much I can do either way.

I don't have many things I'm interested in seeing how I don't have much time for anything but I do like playing the bass guitar. I started when I was thirteen and've played it since― just so I don't have to think. I don't really write songs, just learn certain ones I like, then practice till I can play them by memory.
I also like to sleep a lot so that's basically a hobby at this point.

We don't get days off― maybe like a month-long vacation once a year but that's about it―....unless we really get our shit rocked and need a few days to recover. Otherwise? We're not really going anywhere.

Me? Who am I? Well, I’m the lucky bastard that got the short end of the stick. I’ve been... dealing. And I haven’t had time to figure out who I am. People say I'm a pain in the ass to be around, but... I’m just tired— and still trying, for whatever that's worth.

 
info Overview
Name - What is Jake Grey Satori’s full name?

Jake Grey Satori

 
Other names - What other aliases does Jake Grey Satori go by?

-Jakey (mostly used by and reserved for Astrid and Marcus).
-Jacob (used as an insult by Darius).
-Mr. Satori (mostly used by the adults).
-Jayee (used by three-year-old Astrid; unable to pronounce his name right― or more so the variation “Jakey”).
-"Grey-eyed bastard" (mostly used by those who hate him or want to kill him).
-"Red Flag" (sometimes used by friends jokingly; other times by people who wanted to have a relationship with him but regretted it once they got too close).

 
Age - How old is Jake Grey Satori?

Book I: 16-21 (with flashbacks of his childhood)
Book II: 21-26 (this is as far as his story goes)
Book III: [redacted] (he no longer appears in the last book but his name is thrown around here and there with brief flashbacks of his life)

 
Gender - What is Jake Grey Satori’s gender?

Cis Male

 
Pronouns

He/It

 
Romantic Orientation/Sexuality

Gay

 
Role - What is Jake Grey Satori’s role in your story?

“I am someone who did not die when I should have died.”

 
Tags
remove_red_eye Looks
Eye Color/Shape/Look

Jake has gunmetal blue eyes, however, looking more so like a deep gray. They're supposed to be a gray-blue mix, but more of the grayness was prominent in his genes so it's really difficult to tell that his eyes should have been blue, even though there still is a faint hue of blue to his iris.
The shape of Jake's eyes are somewhat angled upward in a cat-like, almond shape, but they also have a wide roundness to them― so very much just cat eyes.

His stare is intense if you catch it, and comes off like he knows something you don't, maybe even silently condemning you for the less-than-pleasant things you've done.
When not in a seducing or even playful state, he seems like he's pissed all the time and it shows in the way his eyes narrow, a very very dead death stare. His glare, like everyone else in his family, looks akin to a predator getting ready to tear something apart.
In a neutral setting, his eyes seem to lack sympathy, though when you get close to him you'll notice that they seem more soft and sad than anything else. His eyes are distant like he can't bring himself to stay in the present for too long, even when he's smiling and joking about the crudest things ever.
It's possible to get a soft understanding look from him if you're not part of Apotheosis, but it is extremely rare. His demeanor towards people he doesn't know always seems dull, dismissing, or sometimes even cold and harsh.

Because Jake is also in the same line of work as Andre (sex work), makeup is necessary in the industry to look the best.
However, unlike Andre, he's very minimalistic in his looks, hating to put on more than he needs because of how it feels on his face and hugely because of the pain of taking it off and reapplying it when it gets messy.
His style is along the lines of bold and dominating, indifference being one of the things that makes him a big hit with the rougher customers. Light smokey eyeshadow on the outer corner is his go-to with thinly applied mascara so that it isn't thick or clumpy. Depending if he's trying to go full glam (impress perhaps), he may or may not add small wings to his look.
Something that he does refuse to wear, however, would be foundation (in other words, a full-face, and even lipstick/lipgloss). Sometimes though, you can convince him to add lipgloss to his look if he has winged eyeliner on. But only then.

 
Facial Structure/Other Decorations

Jake has sharp angled cat-like eyes, and thin yet bushy eyebrows with a slit or two through one of them, usually it's the left side.
He has a button nose which is somewhat turned up with a slightly curved bridge. His top lip is kind of thin while the bottom one is slightly plumper. The bottom is decorated with black snake bite piercings- his tongue also pierced.
Jake's face is a mix of heart and round shapes. He has a strong jawline, but still maintains a kind of baby face, though not as much fat on his face as when he was younger. His features are overall really soft looking, the freckles dusting his face only adding to the “soft” look.

Jake has a lot of piercings too, the more visible ones being the snake bite piercings on his bottom lip and the 8mm plugs on both ears. He has three vertical helixes on both ears as well, but only one industrial on his left ear. And because Jake is Jake, all his piercings match the color of his outfits, black.
The other piercings you don't see are the tongue piercing and a more suggestive one that he got at fifteen.

Jake doesn't wear a lot of make-up but nine times out of ten you'll see him rock eyeliner on his waterline, almost always smudged. Though, this is Jake we're talking about, and that 1% of the time where he's not wearing eyeliner it's because he either cried it off or slept it off. He doesn’t really remove his make-up when he goes to sleep (he's bad habit central).

 
Hair Style/Texture/Color

Jake has coal-black hair that's curly, and soft, yet slightly puffy. If he's been out in the rain, it gets even more kinky, adding to the already infuriating volume.
Since it's hard to tame, he regularly shaves the sides of his head, rocking a short yet overgrown deathhawk, though, it looks like a really shitty attempt at one since he does it himself. To him, it's easier and cheaper, not really liking to spend money on himself.
Jake's hair is decently long but not by a lot since it's curly. It obscures one side of his eye even while in its natural state, so technically it would be longer than you would expect if he were to straighten his hair (he loathes straightening his hair).

Once Jake hit his early twenties, his hairstyle changed drastically since he moved on with his life and ditched his old one. Because he takes his father's place in the organization, he learns to be more presentable and "acceptable", so he allows his hair to grow out and be cut properly, styling it according to how his father would have when he was younger (and still had short hair). Aristide at this point in time no longer has short hair, but instead very long locks that come down to his waist. However, he still gave Jake some pointers on what he could do and he roughly adopted an old-school gelled style.
The sides are combed back, careful to not overgell it to the point that it looks wet. The top is loosely gelled and combed to the side and back but it seems to come undone easily― looking messy either way. It would appear that even though Jake has matured a lot by this point, there are still remnant habits of his old life.

 
Height/Weight

H: 5'11"
W: 169 lbs (as a teenager, fifteen to eighteen-ish), and 192 lbs (as an adult, twenty to twenty-two-ish. He gained a lot more muscle mass during that time).

 
Race/Skin Tone/Body Type

Human; Italian/American.
Jake has a very light skin color, looking like something between porcelain and pale ivory tones. He's not a flawless milky white like his sister, given that she grew up under different circumstances, but he does have that subtle similarity to her in that regard if not just barely having a hint of a rose-beige tone to him.

Jake's body is a mix of mesomorph and ectomorph types. He's lightly muscled, enough for him to effortlessly do his daily activities which involve a lot of exercises, i.e., running for extended periods, engaging in hand-to-hand combat (if necessary), and pole dancing. He has a lot of core strength and a decent amount of endurance. His reflexes are also no joke― having the fastest reaction time out of his entire group (they like to joke that he has cat-like reflexes).
In his early teenage years, however, he seemed thinner than built in any way (twink―), but as he grew older, later in his twenties, he gained a fair amount of muscle from the constant strenuous activity his job(s) required of him.

 
Identifying Marks - What identifying marks does Jake Grey Satori have?

Jake used to be a self-harmer, and in many ways still is, but it's no longer in the form of cuts on his skin done by his hand.
From that time, however, (when he was nine all the way to nineteen) he has heavy scarring on his forearms, sides of his thighs, and neck. The most prominent ones though, are the ones on the left side of his neck where he dealt the deepest/roughest cuts.
Jake is quite lucky that he was never successful in his attempts, the markings on his neck being one of the few areas he used to try and end his life. He has a shorter horizontal cut near the base of his palms where he tried to sever the artery but fortunately, he miscalculated and didn't cut deep enough to do permanent damage, i.e., his nerves and the main artery on the surface were missed.
Jake has a lot of other scars littered around his body, some are bullet wound scars, others deep knife scars from either getting stabbed or intentionally hurt― those cuts being more precise wounds made by people who tortured him. He even has small faint dots on his arms from all the needles and testing Nexus put him through.

He also has a very noticeable one on his face (he got this scar at age seventeen) that goes from the bottom of his ear (almost level with the center of his ear) to the edge of his nose. It never crossed the bridge and ended abruptly as soon as it sliced across his cheek. It's fairly deep since he got it in a fight and the person he was up against had the intention of killing him (decapitating him) but the other failed as a last-second intervention happened.

Jake has what looks to be a "tattoo" on his left arm. It looks like a large black jagged ripped pattern going around and up his arm. Looks a little something like this: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/9e/24/91/9e2491bc140185edb8fcf932c3d63f25.jpg
And he also has another by his side of a man playing a guitar that looks like this: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/70/c5/be/70c5bec355411c56ec6fe0df722f8b78.jpg

 
Casual Clothes/Formal Attire

Jake wears all black clothes to put it simply. If we're getting technical, he has a huge taste for punk clothes, but it's not all the time. He alternates between a few black aesthetics like biker and goth and metalhead outfits.
An example of his everyday attire would be T-shirts with explicit graphics on them like occult stuff, gore, blood, suicidal themes, self-mutilation, etc. with skinny jeans or just fitted jeans. He likes the look of spikes and chains, so you'll most likely see those on the clothes he wears (this was more so in his teenage years, dropping the spikes and chains when he hit his twenties). Crust pants and battle vests are his go-to's, loving to give off that "fuck you" vibe with his patches and hand-decorated designs. His style of shoes is very alternative-centered, shoes like boots, heels, and platform high tops.

He's not too concerned with the "traditional" ways or fitting into a mold of what a man "should" be and instead does whatever he wants, so painting his nails black or getting almond or stiletto acrylics means nothing to him.
In his teen years, he loved chokers and would wear them pretty constantly, but again, he dropped more of the over-the-top accessories as he matured.
Because Jake likes to get into fights a lot as well, it's not uncommon to see him covered in bandaids and patches.
The only thing that really stands out about Jake is the cool-colored pastel necklace that he holds very dear to his heart.


Jake was not a fan of wearing formal attire as a teen, usually opting for a business casual look at best, and yet still somehow found a way for it to look informal and disheveled.

Later in the years after his mid-twenties though, he was required to wear more presentable outfits. So in need of that, he copied what his father used to wear― dressing in ornate all-black suits with small silver details that scream "villain". He did also end up adding black gloves and a long suit trenchcoat to his look which was a staple of his father.

 
announcement Anomaly
Description of Alternate Form:

His genetic makeup due to Nexus' unfinished tests allows for Jake to switch back and forth from human to this 91’ 0” demonic eldritch being. He's about as tall as a six-story building which is nothing compared to what his father and older brother can switch into. They are much much taller than him in their monstrous forms.

And because he can transform into something larger and non-human, he also has the ability to do something smaller, like take the shape of a small black house cat (which he actually does a lot either to fuck with people/comfort them or to go unnoticed when he's genuinely terrified).

[will add more to this, i.e. when i actually sit my ass down and plan on how i want him to look in his non-human form]

 
pan_tool Nature
Hobbies - What hobbies does Jake Grey Satori have?

Getting into fights. No matter with who it is, at this point, it should be classified as a hobby. It seems that more than the adrenaline of it all or even the opportunity to test out his skills, he enjoys the danger of getting hurt.

Writing. It's mostly disturbing philosophical thoughts that most of the time do not make sense to anyone who reads them. He's a tormented individual so he writes down whatever comes to mind if it's no longer something he can keep bottled up. While his journal is used for any and all moments, he tends to write more/seek it out more when he's in emotional distress.

Video games. One of his more "normal" hobbies. It's something he does on occasion since no one is allowed to drop by his house to visit. First-person shooter games would seem like something he would gravitate towards but it's surprisingly not. His favorites are obscure indie RPG games that border on horror.

Electric guitar/Bass guitar. He loves the low vibrations that vaguely make him feel "comfortably numb" (it has a soothing effect, a sort of distant calmness).

Sleeping. It's something he already does almost all day due to his depression and how overworked he is. He sleeps all day and works all night, unless he has school that day in which case he goes to school, only to crash when he gets home.

 
Condition(s)

Jake has been diagnosed with paranoid personality disorder, derealization disorder, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and an extreme case of night terrors.
All of these however are managed by the multiple medications he is on, making the symptoms less so, but with the positives come the negatives, the meds causing other side effects like a lack of appetite to the point where he eats barely anything all day and drug-induced insomnia until his body gives up on him and he passes out cold.

The symptoms that Jake frequently experiences on a daily basis from his depression is the self-destructive nature, self-harm (usually having full mental breakdowns when this happens but it's somewhat rare given he never has time to himself and doesn't like to be vulnerable around others unless he's way past his limit), constant low mood to the point of having little to no energy- getting out of bed being a very difficult task, and irritability to the point of lashing out at others.

The derealization aspect of him gives him that weird detached feeling from himself almost every passing second of his life like he's in a fog and not much seems to matter. There are a lot of emotionally numb feelings going on.
From one point on in his childhood, he never quite felt human anymore and that has persisted all the way to his thirties, there being a repetition of the abuse he experienced in his childhood all the way to when he became a young adult.
Jake has a lot of disconnect from his thoughts and how he feels from that same diagnosis.

From the PPD he has a lot of doubt and untrustworthiness of others, he feels like he's only there to be used and that everyone usually has ulterior motives. He self-isolates a lot because of that and rejects anything good that might come his way because of his deep-rooted suspicions.
His PPD, instead of getting better, ultimately started to get worse through his teenage years because his suspicions would be confirmed again and again when he got hurt by others who were, in fact, using him.

The PTSD later in his twenties became more so abnormal reflexes like jolting when startled and acting out of proportion to the smallest things, ie anger for something that did not warrant such a huge reaction.
The trauma ended up getting buried in his body to the point that he doesn't even need to think about the actions he does, his body just doing it for him in certain situations without his consent.
He has trouble remembering a lot of things, the biggest things he has trouble remembering are certain events in his childhood and people's faces- sometimes small tasks, not being able to concentrate well.
Jake experiences a lot of negative emotions like fear, anger, and guilt, usually blaming himself a lot deep down, even if outwards he tends to blame the other person who hurt him (which he should, rightfully so, but it's not how he really feels).

 
Mannerisms - What mannerisms does Jake Grey Satori have?

•Jake has a really bad habit of picking at his bottom lip to the point where he makes it bleed really bad. I'm talking, ripping the skin off his lips until it burns and makes it hard for him to eat anything without being in excruciating pain.
He, however, never learns his lesson, it being something he does when he's really on edge, sometimes continuing to pick at it even though it hurts like hell.

•He bounces his leg when he's sitting- it's like a subconscious tick, he doesn't really remember when he starts or even notices at all until someone points it out. He has a lot of trouble relaxing, usually shifting in chairs even when he's found a comfortable position to sit in.

•Jake curses a lot- way too much for his own good. Along with this, he loves making suggestive gestures- things like jerking off motions with his hand and provocatively licking his lips.

•Jake constantly chips at the nail polish on his fingers when he's bored or idly standing around waiting for something. Sometimes he'll do it on purpose when someone is talking to him so they can shut up, almost hinting that he does not care about what they have to say.

•Jake is known to be a drama queen at times and does dramatic gestures as if he can physically show the other person what happened in his story, this being something he picked up from both his father and mother when they would fight. They're an Italian family and tend to do a lot of that to express themselves.

•Another thing about Jake is that he's very guarded, so you'll most likely see him with his arms crossed, though more than half the time it's just a soothing gesture when he feels uncomfortable.

•Jake tends to glare at people or scowl at them if he sees them as a threat. He's never tried to hide how he feels about someone else. If he does not like you, do not expect him to smile and pretend to enjoy your presence, he barely tolerates anyone as it is.

•Jake will often ruffle his hair when he's stressed or frustrated, sometimes balling his hands into his hair to where it feels like he's pulling on it, and starts to hurt.

•He has a bad habit of bolting from a sitting position to a standing position when he's having an argument with someone and they genuinely struck a nerve. The action is very threatening in manner, like his "opponent" only has a few seconds before Jake decides his hands would look real pretty around their neck.

 
Motivations - What motivates Jake Grey Satori most?

Jake only has three motivations in life, those being Astrid, his little sister, Apotheosis, a group that became something along the lines of a "family" for him, and Marcus, his lover.

In the beginning, Astrid was his main source of motivation, doing as he was told as Nexus often weaponized her against him.
Because Astrid has been in a coma for several years after an accident with their father (or so Jake is made to believe) they use her as a tool to sort of control Jake and grab his undivided attention- his devotion to Nexus being like no one else in Apotheosis because of this reason. He would betray Apotheosis at the drop of a hat if they ordered him to. Maybe through gritted teeth and tears, but he'd do it.

Jake's sole goal is to protect his little sister, who he believes, should have a better life than him- a better life than their family could ever give. But because she is in a "coma" she can't really go anywhere and transporting her while on the run from Nexus would be very very difficult, if not impossible since Nexus and his father have convinced Jake that Astrid needs certain drugs and care to live.

So at this point, he's basically given in to his family's will and is used again and again with the threat of Astrid's life hanging over his head. When he feels like he can't do it anymore, the first person he goes to is Astrid for motivation, Nexus building a dedicated room for her as per Jake's request.
Everything he does is for his sister, he lives for her and he knows that if he makes a wrong move, not only will he pay for it, but his sister will too.

Apotheosis and Marcus are also big motivators for Jake, but that comes in later in the story, his main focus being on Astrid.
Jake loves Apotheosis and Marcus, his love for them running deep, but if he had to choose between them and Astrid, he would always choose her.
As time goes on, however, there would be a lot more hesitance in his choice between Astrid and the other two, not being able to pick one over the other, but having to.

 
Flaws - What flaws does Jake Grey Satori have?

Rude, sarcastic, stubborn, emotionless, vindictive, sadistic (though he does hide that part of himself unless he's in an interrogation session), unforgiving, holds grudges, can't take criticism, is extremely wary of people, can be controlling and jealous.
Has assaulted people before, though, usually not unprovoked. He is very hostile towards others if he deems them a danger. On the other hand, he can't seem to take dangerous situations seriously more than half the time.

 
Talents - What talents does Jake Grey Satori have?

Critical thinking when in a pinch, emotional intelligence- he feels a lot more deeply than a lot of the people around him, problem-solving which is usually in the form of being able to get himself out of less-than-ideal situations, and risk-taking in situations that need quick actions.
Jake has the ability to explain instructions and plans well, either by military standards or even in more simplified terms. This stems from his father being head of the military and needing to follow in his footsteps. He's expected to articulate his words well, seeing how he would take on a leadership role later in his life.

Can also play the electric guitar and bass as stated above, pretty much having mastered music theory.

Jake's English comprehension skills are more on the "gifted" side of things, his vocabulary surpassing college level when writing. He can pick up words and their meanings easily, however, he chooses to talk informally, loving to border right below average so others don't take him too seriously. He also gets things very quickly, not much context is needed for him to put two and two together.

 
Personality type - What personality type is Jake Grey Satori?


[Childhood] From age six to nine:


Although Jake's personality takes a sharp turn after hitting eleven years old, in his childhood, he wasn't a troublemaker.
If anyone met Jake as a kid (who got to know him as a teenager) they would be in for a rude awakening since the person he turned out to be was not who he was supposed to be.

At this point in time, even though he is a little kid, almost all his innocence is gone by age nine. He's already had more beatdowns than he can count and life has gifted him one too many scars.
But because his training started at age six and he wasn't thrown into the ring earlier, some of his child-like mannerisms and quirks are still intact.
Jake, by anyone who interacted with him, was called a "pleasant and quiet kid"― and he was. While going through hell that his father and Nexus put him through, he was mostly a scared and compliant child. He found out very early on that fighting against the things they wanted him to do was not something that would be tolerated.

So while he was mostly a shy kid who didn't talk unless talked to, he's pretty much in survival mode this entire period of his life.

There were however, rare moments when he was slightly sweeter and tender towards others, oftentimes making a move to try and find any bit of affection he could from those around him. He wasn't typically the type to seek others out for anything (conditioned this way by his father), he mostly kept to himself and was very frequently seen on his own, but being on your own, especially as a kid, would only get you so far and Jake grew depressed very quickly as he was pushed to do better but ignored when he needed any type of comfort or reassurance.
By age seven he already wasn't much for smiling― it was rare to see a grin that showed his teeth, very much preferring a tight-lipped smile for politeness. This reserved nature of his is something that persisted throughout his life when it came concerned to his emotions and personal goals.

Jake, by age eight, was not the type of kid who lit up the room with his chatter and charismatic behavior― not that he ever had that sort of energy to him in the first place, but at this point, it was rather noticeable that he had lost something. A spark, perhaps, that most kids had. He was constantly seen as moody, with a dark, bad-tempered aura about him.
His personality from the time he turned six to when he turned nine very quickly and unnaturally shifted from a fairly quiet and easily charmed kid to someone who wasn't all there anymore. He looked visibly worn down and distant, sometimes putting in efforts here and there to give others a lazy halfhearted smile.


[Adolescence] From age eleven to nineteen:


 
groups Social
Favorite Possession/The Meaning

The tacky metal necklace that Aster stole to give to him for his birthday when she was six. It's a pastel-colored rounded charm necklace that has the words "piss off" on it.
Because it was gifted by his little sister, it already holds a lot of meaning. It was the only thing anyone gave him as a kid and in a way, it symbolizes the hope of getting her back after a while.

 
Favorite Weapon(s)

An old complete black Enfield Mk II revolver.
It was “gifted” to him by his father who told him he wouldn’t let him use any other weapon until he mastered a headshot with it every time he used it.
In a way, it was a death sentence, since it was his only weapon other than his switchblade. His life was put in that revolver and if he missed a shot with it in a dire situation it would be over. He would have to find a different way to get out, using his bare hands and quick thinking.
For the longest time, Jake hated the gun that time and time again nearly ended his life, but after getting used to it and learning that he had what it took to get himself out of difficult situations where he should have died, he saw the weapon as an extension of himself, something that’s been there when he should have had his final moments.
From that moment forward, it's always been his go-to gun, seeing himself in the weapon.

 
Favorite Color/Aesthetic

Bottle Green, Steel Blue. The eye colors of the people he loves the most.

Jake is a punk/metalhead, with a sprinkle of slut somewhere in there. If he wears punk clothes, he'll never wear them casually, fully committing to the whole look. Sometimes he'll opt for a simple black outfit, maybe give off some biker vibes, but it depends on what his mood is that day.

 
Favorite Food(s)

Any type of sweets, preferably with strawberries in or on it, though his favorite is the traditional fraisier strawberry cake. He likes to pair it with black coffee without any creamer or sugar. If he's drinking the coffee by itself then he adds a shit ton of creamer and sugar.

 
Favorite Animal/Insect

Cats, specifically the black and orange ones.
As a kid, he always dreamed of having a pet, but in the household he was raised in, it wouldn't have survived for too long. He loves how calm and yet mischievous cats can be, even if they don't always like him and want to be alone. He just likes coexisting with them. It makes him feel a little less alone.

 
Occupation - What is Jake Grey Satori’s occupation?

Jake is basically a hired gun. His main job is to hunt down people like serial killers, rapists, pedophiles (who take action upon their desires), gang members, terrorists, and just generally really bad people who are wanted by the government. However, unlike a bounty hunter, he gets to torture them or kill them depending on what they have to offer. Sometimes they are hunted down and brought in alive to people like Blake who make a living of off basically experimenting on them and figuring out new ways to heal and destroy the human body. It's mostly for medicinal and war practices and she gets paid a lot of money for doing this, but bringing in people alive to be delivered is more so Niveus' job. Jake is more of a "kill on sight" or "make them talk" guy.
At this point in time, Jake has made a name for himself since he brings justice to those who deserve it but by unethical means. A lot of people have heard about the name "Satori" and while the majority fear it, some celebrate it.

 
Job - What job does Jake Grey Satori have?

These two are different than his actual work. The reason he does these other jobs is because his father manages all of the money given to them by the government from his main job and he doesn’t allow Jake access to the money.
When Jake was sixteen he chose to put all the money he earned towards Astrid's medical bills, being the only one who still had hope she would wake up one day, but it also wasn't like he had a choice. It was either putting the money he earned towards Astrid or handing it over to Aristide.

Jake participates in illegal underground fights on his off days (he only does this like once or twice a week), winning a lot of money if he takes down his opponent and leaves them on the brink of death, in which he succeeds more than half the time.

He also manages to work a part-time job as a male escort. (Only working on the weekends when people are more prone to call him up). He's a sex worker essentially. All of this was before he met his current boyfriend.
Jake wouldn't need to do these extra jobs if he had his own income already like the rest of Apotheosis, but he doesn't, so he tries to find ways to keep himself afloat.

 
Politics - What politics does Jake Grey Satori have?

Anarchism. It is a political philosophy and movement that rejects all involuntary, coercive forms of hierarchy. It radically calls for the abolition of the state which it holds to be undesirable, unnecessary, and harmful.
But more than associating himself with this, he's mostly into political philosophy. Trying to figure out how a society should be set up and how one should act within a society.

 
Religion - What religion does Jake Grey Satori practice?

Atheistic Satanism. A religion of questioning authority, standing up for the truth, and fighting for justice. The goal is to spread compassion, justice, and knowledge.

 
date_range History
Education - What is Jake Grey Satori’s level of education?

Graduated high school early but because his schedule is packed tight with so much work, he doesn't have time for college. Though it would be a good opportunity for him.

 
Background - What is Jake Grey Satori’s background?

Jake and his siblings weren't raised in a good household. They were abused by the one person who was supposed to protect them and be a role model, their father.
As a kid, Jake had it bad, but his brother had it worse, he took on the brunt of the abuse. That didn't mean that it was any easier for Jake.

Because Jake was a kid when this was going on, he didn't understand how bad it could be if he stepped out of line, he wasn't like his brother yet.
His brother, Darius, on the other hand, was already conditioned at this point to obey their father out of fear. He was taught that if he left, their father would hunt them down, seeing how he was part of the government and could easily locate them. Their father was the one in control of the group of kids Jake was a part of, guiding them on their jobs.
Jake's brother was young and scared, so of course, he listened. He didn't have anywhere to go, let alone any money. Darius knew that if he did attempt to run away, he would be locked away forever, or worse, hurt.

Jake’s brother had at one point tried his luck at running away, tired of spilling blood, but their father eventually found him and gave them hell for it. He was an abusive man with anger issues, the power going to his head and he did the same thing to Jake, except for minor inconveniences like when he didn’t listen. He thought that since it worked on Darius, it was best to start out early “disciplining” Jake so he wouldn’t make the same mistakes as his brother.
The only problem now was that Jake had to deal with Darius too. He took his own frustration out on Jake, developing a sick sadistic humor and a deep hatred for him.

From a very young age, his brother subjected Jake to all kinds of torments and Jake's father limited their income and necessities. He took that money and put it away into a savings account, never touching it until Jake turned sixteen. At that point, Aristide gave Jake two options: one, use the money on Astrid's medical bills, or two, the money would be transferred over to Aristide's account, telling Jake that he was too mentally ill and unstable to manage the money for himself. The goal of doing this was to prevent his son from having any type of income, so he couldn't run away. Sometimes Aristide even used that method as a punishment for his two sons for disobeying him.

Even though Jake was treated poorly by his family members, there was an acknowledgment that he was basically the prized possession of the family. Arsitde's pride and joy after the huge fight with his wife that ended his marriage (his favoritism towards Jake ended when he turned sixteen, however). The reason Aristide held Jake to such a high standard and favored him was because everyone knew Jake was born for one sole purpose and Aristide was the one "creating" one of the strongest soldiers to ever exist. He pushed Jake to his limits even as a kid in hopes that he mold Jake into what Nexus wanted.
There was only one reason Jake was born, and it was to be handed over as a weapon for Nexus, but those plans changed when Sienna, Jake's mother, parted ways with Aristide and Aristide was offered a permanent job at Nexus which meant he would keep Jake.
Although Aristide was in charge of Jake, he forfeited all rights to Jake as it had been predetermined in the contract. So even if Aristide wanted to help Jake from the position he was in, he would not be able to. Nexus covered all their bases when it came to Jake and so Aristide thought to do the only thing he could to protect himself, and that was to hurt Jake as much as he could and keep his distance from him. He knew that if he did this, it would help him, in the long run, to not grow attached to Jake and help Jake to focus on the job Nexus had for him instead of looking to Aristide for help or literally anything else.
Because of this, Jake was forced into many things. He was used however Nexus wanted, nothing was off the table.

Jake grew up this way all the way to age sixteen, getting better at hiding how he felt since he would get punished if he showed any signs of weakness. He never really learned to respect his own body and wouldn't care less what he was used for as long as he was getting something in return for it. He would dissociate his way through it anyway.
Despite getting beaten and forced into things, he grew up with a lot of determination- but only for his bedridden sister. Whenever he felt like giving up, there not being a lot of days where he didn't feel that way, he was always reminded of Astrid via the necklace she gave him as a kid.

The reason Jake developed differently in personality than his older brother was because of the people who took care of him even though they were the same age as him (Apotheosis). Not to mention Astrid who was there for the first years of her life. She had a loving nature despite being treated so terribly. His younger sister clung to him and followed him like a puppy. She loved him more than anything because not only did she look up to him, being the brave kid Jake was, but because he was the only one she could form an attachment to, their mother not being in the picture as she abandoned her family. But unfortunately, because of certain events, she was left in a coma, though only for a short while. Jake was never told that Astrid had gotten up from her coma a few months after the incident, they knew it would keep him tied to Nexus if he continued to be in the dark about his younger sister. (To see more go to Astrid's profile)

At age seventeen, Jake found himself being the center of attention. Earning a name for himself on the streets as he captured fugitives and other people of the like. The gangs on the streets and other dangerous fugitives called him a demon, keeping an eye on him, sometimes forming a plan to kill him, but Jake was backed by the government, so if anything happened to him, they too would disappear without a trace.

 
Birthday - When is Jake Grey Satori’s birthday?

October 24

 
edit Notes
Notes

None of the art is mine, they're just there to give you a visual.
(the art with the watermark "Cinnamon" is by a good friend of mine, Livs, she's been very kind enough to draw my characters :))
(and another special thank you to Satoris!! (haha what a coincidence)― the pose is very accurate LMAO)

Pinterest Board: https://pin.it/5EFeg6s

 
business_center Inventory
bookmark Quotes/Phrases
Direct Quotes:

"i've done this and it tastes bad. would do again tho" -Jake having mixed coffee, an energy drink, and alcohol in the same cup at one point in his life.
He did indeed try it again like an idiot and nearly vomited.

"thought about the future for longer than 39 seconds. time to drink poison" -Jake searching through Blake's cabinet of unnamed liquids.

"i may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I am someone's double shot of tequila" -Jake being drunk off his ass.

"you have to approach every problem in your life with the mentality that no one's coming to save you" -Someone asked him for advice.

"i can hardly breathe, and to top it off, it feels like someone keeps trying to hold my head underwater" -Explaining how he feels.

"i keep begging to not be turned cruel but the cruel don't listen, how do you expect me to be okay after this? survive this?" -Before he was forced to torture his family (Apotheosis).

"after the screaming and crying always comes a new level of emptiness you didn't know you were capable of achieving, and it's not something you can shake off easy. it follows you for the rest of your life" -Speaking about his earlier years after he realized he didn't have a choice but to force himself into the villain role.

 
Quotes/Phrases From Movies/Books That Relate:

"If only my heart were as cold as I pretend it is, maybe I could get over this." ― Jessica Katoff

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This may be me at my best." ― Kaveh Akbar, from Calling A Wolf A Wolf: Poems; "Personal Inventory: Fearless (Temporis Fila)

"The other day, lying in bed, I felt my heart beating for the first time in a long while. I realized how little I live in my body, how much in my mind." ― Rodger Kamenetz, from Terra Infirma (University of Arkansas Press, 1985)

"At times, my life seems to be nothing but a series of remorse, of wrong choices, of irreversible mistakes." ― Paul Auster

"It's not you. It's anyone. Sometimes I don't want anyone around." ― Joan Didion

"There's something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold." ― Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

"I was terrified I'd break down.
I did.
It didn't matter." ― Rosalind M. Baker, from Woman Prayers: Prayers by Women; "Breaking Down,"

"I have found it takes a lot of strength to endure myself." ― Henry Rollins

"I have spent my life resisting the desire to end it." ― Franz Kafka

"He knew me by heart. It infuriated me that he knew me by heart." ― Fyodor Dostoevsky, from Notes from Underground

"I just want to thank all those who've destroyed me into the person I am today." ― Nitya Prakash

"Sometimes suffering is just suffering. It doesn't make you stronger. It doesn't build character. It only hurts." ― Kate Jacobs

"Have you ever seen the hell in someone's eyes and loved it anyway?" ― Maram Rimawi

"I am tired of being a person. Not just tired of being the person I was, but any person at all. I like watching people, but I don't like talking to them, dealing with them, pleasing them, or offending them. I am tired." ― Susan Sontag, I, etcetera: Stories

"I love being called a 'bastard'. It somehow implies that the most heinous thing I've done is exist." ― Lord Byron

"I can bear any pain as long as it has meaning." ― Haruki Murakami, 1Q84

"You care, and it's all over the place." ― Anne Sexton, A Self-Portrait in Letters

"To hell with them. Nothing hurts if you don't let it." ― Ernest Hemingway

"The relief of giving in to destruction." ― Franz Kafka, from a diary entry featured in Diaries, 1910 - 1923

"No greater desire exists than a wounded person's need for another wound." ― Georges Bataille, "Ecstasy", from Guilty, tr. Bruce Boone

"As for myself. I had a lot to say. But I was silent." ― Albert Camus, from Youthful Writings; "Intuitions," wr. c. 1932

 
dns Some Fun and No-so-Fun Facts
What is something unique to this character?

•Jake describes Marcus as a type of cake, a “traditional fraisier strawberry cake” (his favorite) since Marcus tastes like strawberries sometimes. To add to this, Jake's favorite fruit is strawberries, so if you want to bribe him with something, anything strawberry-related that's offered to him, he'll take.

•He surprisingly attracts kids who come up and talk to him. It’s probably because of the way he dresses.

•Jake is a complete bitch when it comes to horror games/movies, he can't play or watch without screaming and jolting every time a jumpscare pops up, he curses a lot when he gets scared.

•Jake cuts his fingernails as short as he can get them, that way he won't be able to pick at his lips and cause them to bleed.

•Loves taking a shower with literal boiling water, especially during the winter. He loves warm to alarming levels of heat when showering.

•Listens to music on full blast with his earbuds to the point where you can hear the music from across the room.

•Jake can't cook for shit and usually has to resort to take-out or eating at a restaurant alone because he burns everything he makes. He claims he's not that bad but uhhhh it's bad. He can bake though, but it's rare.

•Can’t have his coffee without smoking a cigarette. It’s what his father does and when he tried it, it seemed to stick. Darius also does this, so I guess it's more of a family thing.

•Doesn't do good with fear, which is why blackmailing is such an effective tool for him. When he can't get out of something, it seems to paralyze him.

•After the age of eighteen Jake’s anxiety got extremely out of control when it came to experiencing love from anyone, due to the things Nexus subjected him to. He would do anything to stay away from that, even if it meant he was unnecessarily cruel.

•Jake smells faintly of cigarettes and leather, but the scent that overpowers this just barely is a fresh scent of incense called “Rain”. It’s light and sweet, a very soft smell. It clings onto his clothes and all his other possessions trapped in the room with him. The smells help him relax on days when the stress is a little too much to handle and he needs something to soothe him while he sleeps.

•He would work at a bakery making sweets that look aesthetically pleasing if he ever got the chance. He doesn't look like the type, but he would.

•Knows how to make really good coffee art, usually either really silly art or really cute designs. It's a sort of hobby for him, though he won't admit it.

•Absolutely hates anything related to BDSM when doing explicit activities because of past experiences.
Because he delved into being a male escort (on the more extreme side), he put himself in a specific category catering to those who needed to take their frustrations out on someone, that someone being Jake- anything went, even if he was significantly hurt by the end of it. The only thing that wasn't allowed was killing him.
One would argue that at this point it was sexual assault or abuse because Jake wasn't exactly willing, but there was always consent there since he was desperate for money and didn’t have another choice.
Because he put himself at so much risk and was down to do pretty much anything the customer wanted, the pay being much higher than your average sex worker, it brought a lot of attention to him from the worst kinds of people.

•Jake was given the nickname "Jacob" because of the Jacob sheep head his family has on display in their living room and a comment from Darius saying he would drive Jake through the horns if he ever got the chance.

•Always has cold hands, his body temperature is always low.

•Jake stopped attempting to find ways to hit the red button for a while when he was with his group, Apotheosis (people he calls family), but after he was on his own nearing his thirties and he reached his goal, he substituted the sharp objects for a more acceptable way of self-harm, it being in the form of concerning drinking and smoking problems.

•Even though Jake gets compliments on his freckles a lot, he has a deep hatred for them. Part of this has to do with his father, Aristide, who constantly reminds him how much of an eyesore it is, the freckles reminding him of his wife Sienna whom Aristide grew to resent.

•Jake has a medium-sized journal full of pictures and names of the people who he’s ever had to kill, writing their stories down, who they were, which family members are still alive and who were the ones that died with them, what they were (if non-human), and what led to their execution.

•Jake also keeps tabs on the family members and other loved ones of the people he’s executed, kind of shielding them from further harm if he can help it and not letting them go down the wrong path because of what he did. While not a guardian angel, most certainly a demonic warning.

•The most common instances where Jake will assume the form of a cat is either when he feels too threatened and/or scared to fight back against an opponent, or when his little sister Astrid is going through one of her depressive episodes. He'll switch at the drop of a hat if he picks up even a subtle hint that Astrid is in a bad mood just to cheer her up.

 
assignment Day to Day Tasks
What does a day off look like for them?

Back when Apotheosis was still formed, on his days off he didn't spend time at his home or the apartment the group of kids had, instead, he wandered around the city, going to coffee shops and buying pastries to fuel his sweet tooth. Jake is a pretty bored person and doesn't find enjoyment in many things, but one thing he loves is the feeling of danger and adrenaline, so he would purposely get into a lot of trouble when he wasn't on the job.
He usually wanders into gang territory he had no business being in and picks fights even if he can't take them all on, because of this, a lot of gangs have tried to get Jake to join them, but Jake cannot due to his attachments to the government. They try to bribe Jake but nothing works as he knows better, so in the end he makes enemies out of them all. Jake is a well-known name at this point out in the streets, going by his last name, Satori, and while some find him intriguing, some of them know to steer clear of him.
Because Jake is very overworked, he only goes out rarely, sleeping all day until it's dark out. The night is when he's most active which is perfect for his activities.
When he's not causing problems, he's usually holed up in his room playing video games, but that doesn't last long as he also gets bored of that pretty quickly. He bounces from one thing to another without thinking twice about it, so if he suddenly has the urge to go out, he'll most likely do that.


Current day, he doesn't do much as he's locked up in a holding cell in one of Nexus' buildings. Partially because he's considered a high threat level and also because of the tests they conduct. Jake was and is still a prime test subject.
After everything went down, Jake got injured to a fatal point and was quickly rushed to Nexus' headquarters to an underground lab where they took care of him.
Now he spends his days in this building, he can never go out so he occupies himself with whatever Nexus has provided for him, he mainly listens to music and writes a lot as there's not much to do in the facility.

 
What do they do on a busy day?

As a kid, Jake would attend elementary and middle school while also attending separate classes to train for his "purpose". Most of his time was spent doing small jobs that a child could "handle" though, Nexus never put a limit on it and pushed Jake to do more and more. These jobs weren't anything too serious, just simple things like learning how to track someone down on his own. He was always monitored on these jobs in case things went sideways, with other personnel on standby somewhere close. Unlike other members of Apotheosis (except for Jen), Jake was put in difficult situations really early on. He started taking on people when he was nine. He did well, already conditioned by his father on what to do from even earlier on.

In his teenage years, he attended high school. His attendance was very choppy due to being pulled out of classes by Nexus a lot. Jake didn't have the best grades due to this, but people around him speculated that if he had been left alone to focus on his studies, he would have been at the top of his classes. Jake is a really smart kid, he just wasn't given the opportunity to be something more.
After school, he either goes home or to Apotheosis' apartment. When he goes home (which is rare in his teenage years) he has dinner with his family and they discuss the things that went on during the day, then he goes straight to his room. He does all his personal hygiene before dinner so he doesn't have to worry about doing it after being drained by the family conversations which can get pretty heated depending on how everyone's day went.
Sometimes at night he and the others (Apotheosis), are put on jobs- these jobs aren't small temporary jobs that can be done in one night. They're usually completed over the course of months and only do them when they get the time.
On nights when he doesn't have a job to do, he goes to the ones he has on the side (the ones his father doesn't know about). This leaves very little time for him to sleep which is why he's always in a mood sometimes. Sometimes he gets to sleep all day. Apotheosis does get breaks to recharge themselves, but they usually only last a day or two every two weeks.

 
place Living Space
What their room looks like

Jake lives in the basement of the old worn down house where he grew up in. When you first enter there are stairs leading down into the space below, before you enter into the actual room, there is a door when you reach the bottom of the stairs.

Opening this door is a semi-small room with a simple-looking full-sized bed pushed to the top right corner of the room. The bed does not have a frame and is just on the dirty floor. While it does not have a frame it does have a bed base so it's not just the mattress itself on the ground. The bed sheets are stained a brownish-red in some parts and look like they've been used for a really long time, which they have. There are two pillows on the bed with matching pillow cases as the once-white sheets, also in the same condition. On either side of the bed are cuffs with decently long straps so he can move when he sleeps at night, but not too much so he doesn't hurt himself with all the other stuff he has in the room.
Beside the bed, on the left side, there is a decent sized black steel locker cabinet. The locker has four compartments, a long one on the left side and three smaller one on the right side.
Inside the locker on the right side, the top two cabinets contain notebooks full of written poetry and thoughts that plagued Jake at night. Some are even nightmares written down matching with his sketchbooks. He only has like three or four books full of these disturbing philosophical stories, the rest being sketch books (this was before he started burning them). The rest of the space, the bottom cabinet, is taken up by a small wooden crate that used to hold ammunition, which is now used to store his personal stuff for example, deodorant, perfume, razors, a comb, and others, nail polish/remover, eyeliner, hairspray, chapsticks, pills, accessories like chokers and bracelets.
The long side on the left is used to store weapons and devices used for torture and the likes.

On the wall beside the bed are symbols/drawings and words spray-painted in black. There are posters of metal rock bands. A small damaged wooden bookshelf with half-used cans of spray paint, the labels torn off and smeared with other colors that aren't in the can itself. There's a picture of a young girl with the biggest smile in a simple black frame propped on top of the bookshelf along with an old shoe box with letters he's written to people he'll never send them to. On top of the shoe box is his current sketchbook he uses in bed sometimes.

In front of the bed, there is a small closet, a mirror nailed to the front of the door. His clothes are stored inside along with his shoes that are tucked away in the bottom portion of the closet. Beside them, is a black laundry basket to the left for his dirty clothes.
Behind the clothes, there are a bunch of vintage pictures of his sister and friends when they were younger, along with this there are old newspaper clips documenting the killings he has done. Drawings of his nightmares are also on this wall, pages he has ripped out of his sketchbook that he wanted to keep.

The rest of the room looks like it hasn't been cleaned in ages. The walls black from the grime and dried blood. There are pipes on the roof of the room with a heater tank beside the closet inserted into the wall to keep it out of the way.
There is a rectangular window near the top of the bed that is sealed shut, cow webs in the corners of the window frame with no spiders in sight. This window gives off little light as the window is opaque, clouded with a thick foggy plastic pane. (https://peteryounghomeinspections.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/Unfinished2.jpg)

 
Do they spend more time at home, or elsewhere? If elsewhere, describe what this location looks like

Never at home. It isn't a set place since he's always moving around, but he tries his best to not actually go home until he has to. That means he'll crash at Apotheosis' apartment more than half the time when he needs a place to sleep, otherwise? He just wanders the city, hanging around places that not too many people frequent.

 
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help Additional Questions
Author's Note

This category and fields come from a friend of mine, and I have gotten permission to use them.
If you would like to see more of her characters I'll link Jean, the one where I got the category from, you can go from there:
https://www.notebook.ai/plan/characters/347912

 
Practices

Q: On an average day, what can be found in Jake's pockets?
A: A pocket knife, spare change which he likes to call his "coffee money" only carrying enough to eat out or buy small things. His phone, a chapstick which he constantly uses so he isn't tempted to pick at his lips (helps him a lot), a single key to the apartment he and a few friends rent. Receipts from recent purchases he's made, like an order from his favorite bakery. Also has a lighter and cigarette carton (something that's replaced over and over again).

Q: Does Jake feel more comfortable with less clothing or more clothing?
A: More clothing. It gives him a layer of protection he likes to think, because of his past trauma. He's very hesitant to undress in front of anyone unless he's worked up the courage to do so, even then it's very nerve-wracking for him. It wasn't always like this- he developed this kind of thinking during his teenage years because of something that happened. After that, he was very hesitant to get involved with anyone for a while.

 
Physical

Q: Describe a scenario in which Jake feels most comfortable.
A: Before he met Marcus his favorite place where he felt most at peace was with his newfound family in their trashy apartment. He still finds this place to be a comfortable one, but with Marcus, he feels much at ease because he's the only one that's stuck by his side since he met him.
The people who he used to call his friends/newfound family had a small apartment rented in the back of an equally small arcade which only a few visited, in the alley in the back there's a door which you can go in through and this space was where they got together to plot their next moves before everything went to hell.

Q: Describe a scenario in which Jake feels most uncomfortable.
A: Jake can take most things, no problem, but when it comes to confronting past demons and having to actually talk about what's happened to him, he freezes up and finds it difficult to formulate thoughts about his experiences, it gives him flashbacks and makes his skin crawl. It's not worse than what he's gone through but he hates having to collect his traumas in one place, so he feels most uncomfortable when he's talking in detail about what happened.

Q: Has Jake ever been bitten by an animal? How was he affected/unaffected?
A: Yes, a cat. He’s also been scratched by one cause the dumbass thought he could straight up pick up a stay cat without any repercussions. It hurt him at the moment, but Jake didn’t mind it as he loves cats and wishes to have one as a companion one day.

 
Psychological

Q: Does Jake have recurring themes in his dreams/nightmares?
A: Yes, both. One nightmare that sticks with him is the one where he's being held down and can't move. He panics and cries out and then wakes up. Another one is where he's running away from something, a horrific monster. He tries to hide but this nightmare changes slightly from one to another, sometimes he hides, other times he runs until he can't anymore and it catches him, and sometimes he resorts to jumping off of a ledge to get away.
Sometimes he has dreams but they are very rare. When he does dream though, he dreams about the worries he has which manifest in weird scenarios that leave him confused when he wakes up.

Q: Does Jake remember names or faces easier?
A: Neither. He doesn't really make an effort to remember anyone unless they're worth it or they catch his attention. In his mind, it doesn't really matter who he meets or if they're nice to him, he most likely won't see them again, and if he does? He won't even hide the fact that he doesn't remember them. Sometimes this ticks the people he sees often a lot because at that point he should know who they are, but Jake is just really forgetful and it takes time for things to stick with him.

Q: What is Jake's biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for him before?
A: I could list a bunch of things because this boy is full of flaws, but the main one is he won't let others help him until it gets to the point where it's too late. Jake hasn't had any serious relationships before, mainly because he's scared of commitment, but when he does find his boyfriend, he does do a lot of things that should have destroyed the relationship. Unfortunately for him, his boyfriend is highly understanding and won't leave his side.

Q: In what way does Jake compare himself to others? Does he do this for self-validation or self-criticism?
A: Jake will often times watch the actions and words of others closely, mostly because of his paranoia, but this also serves to tell him how terrible he really is. Jake sees how much better others are at treating others with kindness and being open with them. He longs for that, to be able to do the same but he won't let himself, or well, past trauma won't let him.

Q: What does Jake find repulsive or disgusting?
A: Pedophiles, abusers, rapists. He wishes he could kill every single last one of them. He physically can't stand being in the same room as one if he knows what they are and will go absolutely sicko mode on them even if they haven't done anything yet.

Q: In the face of criticism, is Jake defensive, self-deprecating, or willing to improve?
A: Jake is pretty pessimistic already, so criticism is just another blow that reinforces his mentality. He usually knows about the areas he is lacking in, but having someone tell him that makes him visibly depressed because he wishes he could be kinder to people, open, and not rough around the edges. It's the knowing that others see his flaws that makes him sad. He's tried hard to change but relapses back to his old ways, it's difficult for him.

Q: Is Jake more likely to keep trying a solution/method that didn't work the first time, or immediately move on to a different solution/method?
A: If Jake sees that something didn't work the first time, he moves on rather quickly. What's the point? Nothing's going to change no matter how much you keep doing the same thing over and over again. It's better to try everything else before he comes back to the same method he's tried before.

Q: Does Jake feel that he deserves to have what he wants, whether it be material or abstract, or does he feel he must earn it first?
A: No, he feels like he doesn't deserve anything, even when others say he's earned it. Mostly because his bad outweighs his good and he believes that people who are like him don't deserve good things.

Q: Has Jake ever had a parental figure that was not related to him?
A: Yes! It's his best friend Jen, who's the same age as he is. Jen is very caring in nature and he likes to make sure everyone around him is doing okay, especially Jake because he knows how much he's gone through.

Q: How easy or difficult is it for Jake to say "I love you."? Can he say it without meaning it?
A: It's not difficult to get an "I love you" out of him, he always means it when he says it. Saying those three words hold weight for him and he believes it should only be said to those who've truly earned it in his heart.

Q: What does Jake believe will happen to him after he dies? Does this belief scare him?
A: Jake doesn't believe there is anything after death. Once you're gone, you're gone and that's that. It doesn't really scare him as much as it used to, mostly because he's come to terms with the fact that there's nothing he can do to change it.

 
Personal

Q: Is Jake's current socioeconomic status different then it was when he was growing up?
A: Yes. When he was younger his father was the one who managed all the money, but he never helped their kids and gave them the bare minimum mostly as a form of punishment. They weren't rich per se, but they did have a decent amount of money in the bank. Once Jake was introduced to Apotheosis he started making money of his own, which was still sadly managed by his father who didn't want Jake to save money to get away from him and his job. But Jake does end up having two secret jobs hidden from his father and that's how he manages to save money for the future and his current needs.

Q: Is Jake more preoccupied with money or material possession? Why or why not?
A: Money, because he struggled financially along with his brother when they were growing up. He works a lot to keep up with the payments for the apartment now abandoned by his friends. He wants to make that space his new home and move out so he’d have to work a lot to pay for it since it isn’t split against all eight of them anymore. He’s also hellbent on saving money for the future, mainly for Aster’s medical bills since he plans to take her with him or at the very least take her out of the house she’s bedridden in.

Q: How quick is Jake to trust someone else?
A: Not very likely, this motherfucker has a paranoid disorder for crying out loud. He usually believes others are out to get him since the people closest to him as a child showed that they could not be trusted.

Q: How quick is Jake to suspect someone else? Does this change if he is close with that person?
A: He’s very quick to suspect someone else. He’ll find even the slightest reason to not trust someone even if they didn’t mean what they said in a certain way.
With close friends like Jen and Rae, he still struggles with believing that they truly won’t hurt him, but he has a bit more trust with them as they’ve built a strong relationship and constantly reassure Jake that he’s okay and not in any danger. You can quite easily get into Jake’s head if you know certain things about him, his brother Darius uses this against him a lot which is also why he never really opens up. This also confirms his fears of others being no good.

Q: What did Jake dream of being or doing as a child? Did that dream come true?
A: Because Jake was isolated as a kid, more than anything, he wanted to form connections with others and have friends. He wanted to conquer the world with said friends and live together.
Later on, in his early teens, he did make these friends and got to experience what it was like living with them.

Q: Is Jake more concerned with defending his honor or protecting his status?
A: Protecting his status. Without it, he’s basically nothing and he knows this. His status gets him into places he can’t go and gives him permission to do things he regularly wouldn’t be able to do. He doesn’t care for honor since he’s seen what it did to his father.

Q: Is Jake more likely to remove a problem/threat, or remove himself from a problem/threat?
A: Jake is a very angry individual when you push his buttons and if he sees someone as a threat, he will remove them. It’s part of his job, after all, so he has no problem fucking someone up who deserves it.

 
Personality

Q: What was Jake's favorite toy as a child?
A: A knife.
No, but in all seriousness, he didn't get a chance at being a kid, Jake's parents never bought anything for their kids, except for Jake's mother, who only bought things for Aster when she was still with them.

Q: In what situation was Jake the most scared he's ever been?
A: In the scene "Betrayal." when he yells out for them to stop when they're about to kill Aster. If she would have died everything he would have done up until that point would have been pointless. All the people he let hurt him, all the situations he put himself in that were less than ideal, and all the people he killed would have been for nothing. Every single thing he's done has been with the intention of helping his sister. Jake himself doesn't know why he's so attached, maybe it's the fact that she hasn't been ruined by anything yet and he wants to give her the life he wishes he would have had.

Q: Is Jake more likely to admire wisdom or ambition in others?
A: Wisdom. If he would have had a little more of that he would have saved himself a lot of heartaches. He feels that ambition can be a bad thing, as seen with his father, because once you have something, sometimes you want more and more to the point of sacrificing others. Little does he know that he's followed in his same father's footsteps, just with a different goal in mind. His ambition was aimed at helping his sister to the point where he didn't care who he had to hurt and go through to see her again.

Q: If something tragic or negative happens to Jake, does he believe he may have caused or deserved it, or is he quick to blame others?
A: Deep down he'll blame himself and won't stop feeling guilty for a long time, but when talking to others about this experience he'll most likely blame the people who hurt him.

Q: What does Jake like/dislike about other people?
A: He likes how other people can be themselves and don't mind what others think of them, he strives to be like this but finds it very difficult to not be guarded all the time. What he mostly dislikes about other people is if they're abusive, or try to control others just for their own benefit. It's something that gets on his nerves and when he finds out someone is like this, he can't keep quiet.

Q: Which does Jake idealize most; happiness or success?
A: Success in the sense that he reaches the one goal he's had since he was a kid, but happiness is the close second. He wants to live a normal happy life away from everything and anyone that's ever hurt him.

Q: How does Jake behave around children?
A: He doesn't know how to behave around children. He finds himself wanting to be soft and caring but also they annoy him sometimes and he wants to treat them as adults.

Q: How does Jake deal with confrontation?
A: Head on. He'll address the situation, whatever it may be and if things get violent, then he's prepared for that too.

Q: How quick or slow is Jake to resort to physical violence in confrontation?
A: Jake is very quick to escalate the situation. He doesn't mind getting hurt if that's the way things turn out, but nine times out of ten he knows when he can take on a person and he'll go for it. Even if he knows he can't win, he'll still provoke the other person into a fight.

Q: How does Jake behave around people he likes?
A: If Jake likes someone you won't really know it unless he makes an effort to show that he doesn't mind being around said person. You'll see him get a little more involved with the people he likes, though, he may not know how to show it.

Q: How does Jake behave around people he dislikes?
A: Jake will make it known if he really doesn't like a person. Because hatred runs deep in his blood along with the rest of his birth family, he'll most likely confront the person at hand if they're being obnoxious, but if they mind their business Jake won't really do anything unless they start targeting him and his family (and by family I mean Marcus, his boyfriend).

 
book For Other Writing Purposes
Character Form

Name: Jake Grey Satori
Nickname: Jakey
Age: 21
Gender: Cis Male
Pronouns: He/It
Sexuality: Gay
Race: Human, Italian/American

Appearance: Jake's got charcoal grey eyes, an almost very dark silver even though there's a hint of blue that is more noticeable when the light hits him just right. His eyes are angled in a cat-like shape, being an almond shape, but also round and wide and just barely slanted. His eyebrows are thin yet bushy with two slits on one side.
Jake has coal-black hair that's curly, and soft, yet slightly puffy. If he's been out in the rain, it gets really frizzy and puffs out more than what it normally looks like. Because it's kind of hard to tame, he regularly shaves the sides of his head, kind of rocking a short yet overgrown deathhawk cut, though, it looks like a really shitty attempt at one since he does it himself.
Jake's hair is decently long but not by a lot since it's curly and barely obscures one side of his eye. It would be a bit longer than you would expect if he were to straighten his hair.

He has a decently long straight nose that is somewhat turned up with a slightly curved bridge. His top lip is kind of thin while the bottom one is slightly plumper, the bottom one looking like he's chewed on it a bit, some spots bright red while the rest looks normal. His lips have a rougher texture because of this, having lost his chapstick he keeps on him at all times. His bottom lip is decorated with black hoop snake bite piercings- his tongue also being pierced.
Jake's face is a mix of heart and round shapes. He has a strong jawline, but still maintains a kind of baby face, though not as much fat on his face as when he was younger. His features are overall really soft looking, the freckles dusting his face only adding to the “soft” look.

Jake is 5'11" and weighs 169 lbs.
He is extremely pale to the point where his skin looks to be a very milky white. His body is more of a mix of mesomorph and ectomorph types, having some muscle for him to do his daily activities which involve a lot of exercise, but not extremely so. He, however, leans more towards the twink ectomorph body type.

He has a few tattoos here and there, but one of the larger ones is the one he has on his side of a guy playing a guitar. (It looks a little like this: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/70/c5/be/70c5bec355411c56ec6fe0df722f8b78.jpg)
Jake's got a lot of piercings too, the more visible ones being the snake bite piercings on his bottom lip and the 8mm plugs on both ears. He also has three vertical helixes on both ears as well, but only one industrial on his left ear. And because Jake is Jake, all his piercings match the color of his outfits, black.

The clothes he wears are more of a punk scene type, but it's not all the time. He alternates between a few black aesthetics like biker and goth outfits. Sometimes he'll opt for a simple black outfit, things like T-shirts with explicit graphics on them like occult stuff, gore, blood, suicidal themes, self-mutilation, etc., and simple fitted black jeans. He likes the look of spikes and chains, so you'll most likely see those on the clothes he wears. Crust pants and battle vests were mainly his go-to's before this, loving to give off that "fuck you" vibe with his patches and hand-decorated designs. He also wears alternative shoes like boots, heels, and platforms.
The only thing that stands out about Jake is the cool-colored pastel necklace that he holds very dear to his heart.

(Here's an example of kind what he could be wearing: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/55/c6/0c/55c60ce11bf67580b015df10de3cf3a4.jpg, or this one https://i.pinimg.com/564x/09/51/f0/0951f03148ea8a5e0c791aeb10db4ad6.jpg)

(I saw this drawing a while back and while it's not mine, I thought it looked strikingly similar to what my guy might look like so I'll link it here: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/10/d3/d5/10d3d527d688b9b45884b326433ff31e.jpg)

Personality: If you met Jake and don’t know him on a personal level he’s very much the prankster type, teasing others and flirting till he gets what he wants. He’s confident to a disgusting degree, almost on the verge of a god complex, thinking he can do whatever he wants without consequences. His cocky attitude, however, is simply a front as he has walls built up for a reason, his what he believes to be "fake personality" not only a way of protecting himself but also mostly to be seen as insufferable than pathetic for letting his emotions get the better of him. Sometimes his bold personality blends in with the sadness, making this weird concoction of Jake trying to reach out for help only to back out at the last second.

Jake is mostly a friendly face although very chaotic, loving to push people's buttons. Maybe he's got a bit of suicidal tendencies, rushing into danger for the smallest things even when it's not prompted, but that's how he's always been, and it's quite literally a miracle he's still alive.
There are rare occasions where he'll seem a little more dejected than usual, looking really dull and tired unless something really interests him. Jake is also a little touchy with certain subjects, so if you bring up the wrong thing, he'll definitely snap at you if you keep trying to push him to tell you more when he's stated he won't.

Jake isn't difficult to befriend, but sometimes he just seems like a spiky character due to the way he carries himself, looking straight-up murderous more than half the time when he's not being an idiot and bothering someone, but on the contrary, he’s a very caring individual and will panic if someone he loves is hurt. He's very attentive to those who have faced similar struggles as he has even if he struggles to form connections that aren't just surface level.

Background: Jake comes from an Italian family whose grandparents made the move to America, Jake's parents already knowing the ins and outs of the country by the time he was born. And while his parents hadn't been especially terrible to their first child in the beginning, the Satori kids weren't exactly raised in a good household.

After it was discovered that Jake's mother had been infidel to her husband, things completely went downhill for the family.
Jake's mother, Sienna, leaving (although fleeing would be the more accurate description given the circumstances) when her youngest child turned six and the truth about who the father was came to light. Jake's father didn’t take the news well at all and ended up spiraling at the time, taking his frustrations out on his children. Unfortunately, things were never the same, and abuse on their father's end didn't stop even as Jake hit high school.
As a kid, Jake had it bad, but his brother had it worse as he took on the brunt of the abuse. That didn't mean that it was any easier for Jake, and since there wasn't a whole lot Jake could do as a kid, dealing with his father and then brother who grew to hate and resent him, he left.
His little sister’s death at the hands of his father serving a warning for Jake who knew he would have a similar fate if he allowed himself to remain with the man who cared for no one but his wife that had left.

So at age sixteen, he found himself running away and taking refuge with a guy who worked with prostitutes, giving Jake a job as a male escort and taking care of him after having found him on his deathbed. Those few years weren't the best, in fact, they weren't much better than his home life, but after a while, he grew accustomed to it, taking on the job as a full time per the request of the person who had helped him. There weren’t a lot of options left anyway so Jake took what he got and made a name for himself in the city he lived in at the time.
From then to now, Jake got involved a lot with the wrong people, criminals, toxic and abusive individuals, gangs, all of it.
Still, some good came out of it surprisingly, meeting a person from one of those gangs who he eventually was able to call his boyfriend. And although it didn’t last long, not by fault of either, Jake still called those three years the best ones of his life before he succumbed to the pain and grief of losing yet another person who he had loved more than life itself.

Other: https://pin.it/7bInmo6

 
Character chevron_right Friends link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Step-Sibling(s) link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Enemies link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Half-Sibling(s) link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Best friends link linked Jake Grey Satori


Group chevron_right Members link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Children link linked Jake Grey Satori


Scene chevron_right Characters in scene link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Spouse(s)/Partner(s) link mentioned Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Love interest(s) link mentioned Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Relationship Status(s) link mentioned Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Siblings link linked Jake Grey Satori


Character chevron_right Love interests link linked Jake Grey Satori


This character was created by Daiz Tadhg on Notebook.ai.

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