forum Your Personal Venting Space 3: Tokyo Drift

Started June 28, 2020 by @The-N-U-T-Cracker

tune

Huh, I haven't been into the Rudeness chat in ages.

Rn we're talking about rabbits.

pog

Anger

mood

happy vent: i forgot that a few of my teachers at my school nominated me for Student Of The Month for creativity and that i was actually selected but i just got my prize for being selected (it's a $10 amazon gift card) and i'm just so friggin happy oml nsbndbsnbnss

Congrats!!

ty!! tbh i didn't expect my teachers to actually nominate me for this and i remember hearing my name over the PA system and being like 'wait am i in trouble" and i went down to the office and asked the lady at the front desk what that was about and then she told me the news and i was just like 'WASAHSHASHASHAHSASAA???? WHA????" and i went back to english class with a huge grin on my face and it was just so nice to hear that my teachers actually took their time to nominate me and this is sounding like a thank-you speech i'm gonna shut up now

Awww that’s great!!

mmmmmmmmmmm
we're doing course choices and I'm so anxiety rn

small vent: i don't know what classes to choose for next year and it's causing so much anxiety because like aaaaaa because i have an entire extra two semesters so i could take basically any class i wanted but i don't know which one to choose and i know i have to make the decision eventually buy mmMMmMm and it's junior year too which is just another thing on the pile of things and i don't know and it's such a small thing but I'm still??
like i'm taking english 3 and precalc and AP bio and APUSH and an engineering course and AP psych and sociology but i still have an extra slot and i just
help
part of me kinda wants to take a fine arts again cuz it could be fun and i'm running out of time for it because junior frickin year and just
yea
could also do like journalism or debate or like something to see what it's like but then if I dislike it and am stuck with that for the year it'd just be >:(

Do debate
it's easy

me: small vent :(
writes a whole paragraph on something that could've been like 3 sentences

ahaaa
I did my course choosing already and found out I only have to take two classes, but also I'm moving in june/july so I'm going to have to do it again at the new school and I hate it

me: small vent :(
writes a whole paragraph on something that could've been like 3 sentences

Opposite for me. I can be v consice naturally so some assignments were really annoying bc they wanted two pages or smth.

God I'm so fucking sad and tired. And I feel terrible for probably crying more than anyone else about all this. Yknow, just being the sensitive little baby everyone already thinks I am.
I'm exhausted, my eyes hurt, my head hurts, but I probably won't be able to sleep.

Being sensitive sucks. But there’s probably nothing wrong with it.

I'm so exhausted. I woke up at 6 bc I had in person school today, got home at 1, then I had to go back to school at 3 for art. I speedran my painting project and finished the face all today. I got home at 6 and then I had to help my mom around the house. Then I took a 30 min nap but actually ended up sleeping till 10 and I still have so much hw and two quizzes tomorrow in both the classes im failing.

ok so
vent story time wooo
cw: death threats, homophobia, mention of vomit

but yeah there's that. hopefully i'll get it resolved soon but for now, my anxiety about the whole situation has spiked

Mmmmm
cried for an hour this morning becuase I hate my body pog

Me, in literal tears: Can I take a mental health day, I'll go to online school?
My Ma: No. You're going to school.

holy fuck everyone in my english class is screaming and i forgot loud noises and yelling are triggers for me and just SNSVHshjdbjkhbjSJJBSNBJMSMNs my brain feels like it's overheating wtf is hAppening

aha
once again my father is back on his bullshit of 'I'll be better' then immediately drop us into a 'discussion' where I'm not allowed to address the literal bullshit he's spewing or the fact that I do have reasons for not doing what he wanted me to do for my class, specifically THE TEACHER TOLD ME WHAT TO DO IN THIS SITUATION and he doesn't like the fact that I didn't ask for help his way and that I'm not over the crippling fear and anxiety emailing teachers for help gives me even though literally the last time he forced me to I broke down sobbing and couldn't physically move
God I wish I was still in counseling so my therapist could look him in the eye and confirm that what he is doing is bullshit and hurting me like she had several times before
but as soon as my insurance wasn't being accepted there anymore he refuses to get me to a therapist who does because the other option 'is a welfare mine' and doesn't actually help people, when I know for a fact it does
He just doesn't understand how it can take more than a year to work through trauma and has told me 'that's a load of shit' when I said that the things he's done to me still affect me to this day
I very much still start to panic when anyone touches my art supplies, or brings up certain subjects
God I want to move out but also I know I'm going to have a hell of a time finding a job I can hold down with my mental health issues and I can't go on disability because oop- it was never officially signed off on that I have these things so in the eye of the law I'm a Perfectly Healthy and Capable person

I um….I have my first joint therapy session with my dad and I’m really nervous. Like I’ve felt like shit all morning. I doubt I’ll talk the entire session.

I swear to fucking christ, the class next to us is literally screaming, a grown man, screaming, like a child. I swear, I hate humanity.

My mom can't be on time to save her fucking life and I'm so sick of it because she makes me late all the time and I can't do anything about it. Everyone looks at me funny when I walk into class late and I'm just like y'all, I don't drive myself, what do you want from me.

Have you tried telling her stuff starts maybe 10-15 minutes before it actually does? That works for me

Well I can't now, I do that with most stuff cuz I've learned, but as far as school goes, she already knows what time it starts.

Damn :/

Can you drive? Or maybe ask someone else to take you?

Nope. I haven't even got my permit yet (and I'm 16, this shit is rigged-) and my mom definitely wouldn't let anyone else take me. My home situation is- complicated, so that's not an option unfortunately. Plus we live like 20 mins away from my school and she works in the same city I go to school in, so it just wouldn't make sense..

I have an insane ✨headache✨ and I'm scared of the ✨future✨