forum Your Personal Venting Space 3: Tokyo Drift

Started June 28, 2020 by @The-N-U-T-Cracker

tune

On the subject of not being able to read gay books I was really excited to read Red, White, and ROyal Blue when I moved out but now I have to be home this semester cause of freaking covid

I love my friend because one second we're having a heated debate about One Piece and the next I'm showing him a meme that he'll understand and I don't
Then we start arguing about puns

On the subject of not being able to read gay books I was really excited to read Red, White, and ROyal Blue when I moved out but now I have to be home this semester cause of freaking covid

MOOD
I'm so excited for that one but I'll have to wait until the library reopens to get it, and idk when they will

my pastor is talking about the yiffy wiffy today and i just
:{
y u c k
(He's also high key being sexist)

ooooooof

Literally my pastor pretty much word for word: celibacy is a gift, if you don't have it and try to be celibate it can cause scandals and ruin your life. Cornthians says to take a spouse if you need someone. "Better to marry than to burn with passion". Don't force people to be celibate, it's a gift. Don't EVER apologize for wanting a husband or a wife- God gave you that desire. If that's who you are, if you don't have the gift of celibacy, don't apologize. It's ok that you have a desire and want a relationship.

Gay people: exist

Most conservative churches: not you

how's that sexist?

Not that, he said too much sexist stuff for me to put here. That's just something I thought of

On the subject of not being able to read gay books I was really excited to read Red, White, and ROyal Blue when I moved out but now I have to be home this semester cause of freaking covid

MOOD
I'm so excited for that one but I'll have to wait until the library reopens to get it, and idk when they will

Ooh I loved that book! But I had to be so so careful so I didn't get get caught

twitter is really starting to PISS me off….

Jusr now?

it always does but this time is different

Twitter doesn't deserve rights <3

I feel so useless. Everyone my age is already so accomplished and skilled and any improvement seems so far away.

Big same
But dude you're really good at art and you're also cool and with the last one alone you've beat out half the people your age

I am in a highly destructive self-improvement kind of mood
like I just want to throw stuff, shatter things, injure myself, out every messed up thing about me to everyone I love, and make my life into an empty living hell so I can toughen up enough to snap out of all this, finally be normal again
I just hate who I am now. I hate her so much. She isn’t really me and it’s obvious, yet I can’t make her go away. No one wants to talk to me anymore, I can feel it in people’s tones, they want the old ella back, but I can’t find her. I’m nothing.

I feel so useless. Everyone my age is already so accomplished and skilled and any improvement seems so far away.

Dude I’m 20 and still wondering if I’ve ever accomplished anything worthwhile. I think it’s safe to say that you’ll be alright.

Nah, Nutella, that ain’t the way to do it. I love you as you are, though I won’t deny that you can and should improve as a person. But so can everyone.

Hhhhhhh I went to the library and got books and my dad went through my bag and took the two gay ones. I managed to cover my ass (I think) and I'm not getting in trouble but I'm still shaky and it feels like there's a fist gripping my heart and squeezing and I'm terrified that I'm going to get in trouble somehow and I feel like I'm gonna cry and…and this is probably too much and I don't know. I just don't know.

Not gonna lie, I hate your parents a little bit.

Yeah me too. I'm still shaky and it's been like five minutes and my heart feels funky and is this anxiety??? I really hate this someone make it stop

Although I did get away with keeping an Adam Silvera one, so I'm happy. Also the third book of ADSOM

Although I did get away with keeping an Adam Silvera one

Ooh, which?

Although I did get away with keeping an Adam Silvera one

Ooh, which?

More Happy Than Not

That is super scary, I'm super sorry bb :(
I can be your dad now, you want me to be your dad? Or even just like your encouraging older sister who slips you gay books

Yeah but I know that exact feeling you described. Its really scary, I'm sorry.

Although I did get away with keeping an Adam Silvera one

Ooh, which?

More Happy Than Not

Noice

That is super scary, I'm super sorry bb :(
I can be your dad now, you want me to be your dad? Or even just like your encouraging older sister who slips you gay books

Yeah but I know that exact feeling you described. Its really scary, I'm sorry.

:( Thank you
Yes thank you, perfect. You can adopt me :P

Yeah. It's getting a little bit better but like…I still feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop? And I don't know what to do?

Although I did get away with keeping an Adam Silvera one

Ooh, which?

More Happy Than Not

Noice

Yeah. I read Infinity Son and They Both Die at the End already (They Both Die at the End made me so sad!! I cried so damn hard it was really good) so I'm hopeful that I'll like this one. It's also the only gay-ish one to survive The Purge^TM so there's that

That is super scary, I'm super sorry bb :(
I can be your dad now, you want me to be your dad? Or even just like your encouraging older sister who slips you gay books

Yeah but I know that exact feeling you described. Its really scary, I'm sorry.

:( Thank you
Yes thank you, perfect. You can adopt me :P

Yeah. It's getting a little bit better but like…I still feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop? And I don't know what to do?

It is done

There's nothing you can do except make sure you don't have anything incriminating on your phone or other devices and just try and relax. The feeling will pass and until it does there's nothing you can really do. If you can't relax on your own try and do something distracting

That is super scary, I'm super sorry bb :(
I can be your dad now, you want me to be your dad? Or even just like your encouraging older sister who slips you gay books

Yeah but I know that exact feeling you described. Its really scary, I'm sorry.

:( Thank you
Yes thank you, perfect. You can adopt me :P

Yeah. It's getting a little bit better but like…I still feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop? And I don't know what to do?

It is done

There's nothing you can do except make sure you don't have anything incriminating on your phone or other devices and just try and relax. The feeling will pass and until it does there's nothing you can really do. If you can't relax on your own try and do something distracting

:D

Yeah. I'm already super careful about my phone (I use private browsing for Notebook) and I unfriended my mom on Goodreads so she can no longer see my reviews, where I use curse words and talk about LGBTQ stuff, so…I don't think there's anything else I can do. And I don't get downtime to calm down because we're going somewhere, which makes me anxious anyways, and ugh

What other books didn't make it?