forum Big Brother: Gay Edition (MATURE, Enter at own risk!)

Started May 16, 2020 by @ElderGodSwimwithGamers group

tune

Halm moved to lightly rub Nix's jawline and neck.
"That was before. Now, though… It's dangerous to redo it. That means, if it decided to, it could cause a lot of problems…"

Cas nodded a bit. "When will you be able to do it again?" He asked softly. Nix melted into Halm's touch, purring loudly.

"It'll be a while," Halm admitted. "Until then we'll have to be careful." He looked down at Nix, glad he at least was enjoying himself.

"Makes sense…" Nix dragged himself into Halm's lap and huddled close to him, his ears twitching a bit.

"These are just precautions, of course. You'll most likely be perfectly fine." Halm wrapped one arm around Nix lazily, scratching his chin with that hand while rubbing his head with the other.

Nix was smiling, still purring loudly and clearly enjoying himself immensely. "I hope you're right, Halm…" Cas sighed softly.

Halm took one hand away from Nix to put on Cas's shoulder lightly.
"Everything will be fine." He was glad he was making Nix happy, eventually pulling his hand away to continue pouring attention and love on Nix.

Cas nodded a bit and lay down, staring at the ceiling. Nix meowed softly amongst his purring, still nuzzling against Halm affectionately.

Halm laid down as well, bringing Nix with him.
"Will you try to sleep?" He asked, "Or perhaps we could keep talking?" He scratched Nix's head, holding him close.

"I dunno… I'm not really tired right now." Nix clung to Halm, still nuzzling against him and purring.

Halm pulled Nix a bit closer, giving him tons of pets and love. He was enjoying this a lot. It was something to do while he talked out Cas, but he was also doing it because he enjoyed making Nix happy.
"Well, it's up to you either way."

"Mm… what would happen if I died again? Would it be permanent?" He asked. "Since my soul is all… I dunno… right now." Nix seemed unable to hear the conversation over his purring and exhaustion.

Halm was a bit glad Nix wasn't paying attention. He hesitated before answering.
"…Yes. It would be permanent. You'd either need a new body made, or… Be reborn. With it without memories."

Cas nodded a bit. "Is that just like… a right now thing? Like, say… if I'm here a month and heal up and die again. Would it still be permanent?"

Halm nodded.
"It would be very dangerous to try to put you back into your body again. It could cause permanent damage to your soul." He reached out with one hand, setting it lightly on Cas's shoulder.

Cas sighed softly. "What kind of damage? Isn't my soul pretty damaged anyway? It hates me. It wants me dead."

"Damage like… Destruction." Halm spoke quietly. He knew Cas's soul was already messed up, but destruction… That was a no go.

Cas nodded a bit. "That's what it wants, isn't it? It wants to destroy itself. That's why it wants to kill me."

"And I won't let that happen." Halm moved his hand to cup Cas's cheek.

Cas sighed softly. "What's wrong with me? Why does my soul hate me?"

"It happens sometimes," Halm said softly. "When you've been told you don't matter enough, or that you shouldn't exist, your soul will start to believe that." He held Nix close with one arm, cupping Cas's face with the other.

Nix had fallen asleep in Halm's lap at this point, still purring weakly. Cas leaned into Halm's hand and closed his eyes, sighing a bit. "It's becoming rather problematic…"

"I know," Halm said gently. "But with time, it can be fixed." Halm shifted a bit, moving Nix a bit to be more comfortable.
"We're going to help you."

Cas nodded, huddling closer to Halm. "I-I'm just… um… scared… sometimes I'll get these troubling thoughts… I guess they're probably from my soul."

Halm gently lifted both hands to Cas's face now, gently holding him.
"Your probably right. And it'll take time to heal, for those to go away. But Nix and I are here to help you."

"Thanks…" Cas sighed softly, keeping his eyes closed. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess…"

"It's alright," Halm said gently. "It's not your fault." He gently rubbed Cas's cheek, so concerned for him.

"I-I just… why does everyone hate m-me?" Cas looked up at Halm, his eyes stinging with tears. "M-My own soul hates me…"

"I don't hate you," he said gently, trying to remain calm. "Nix definitely doesn't hate you. What about Kora, and her brother? Everyone here cares about you." Halm tilted his head towards Cas, holding him close.