forum The LGBTQ+ Community Chat :)

Started April 21, 2018 by @Tylerrr-M-P

tune

I can't wait to read that one!!

Not in like a "it's not meaningful to me because I'm not in middle school" way, in a "I needed that book earlier before I made a bunch of questionable choices and had some toxic relationships" way

sO "tHey saiD soMethinG tO tHey"?

I don't get why some people make such a big deal about using they/them pronouns to refer to someone, it's not that hard? Like, saying "they want to come over today" instead of "he wants to come over today" is a super fucking easy shift
Also uh just know some basic grammar, bud, literal elementary schoolers know that it's him/her/them and not him/her/they, it's basic conjugation. Sorry you forgot 12 years of education just to be a dick to nonbinary people :/

It's also.. already a thing. Like. We say it anyway

Yeah, you don't go "the mailman drove HIS OR HER car over to HIS OR HER house"

the “his or her” thing annoys the crap out of me
just say their
even if you think trans people are evil and sinful for whatever reason, saying “they” isn’t supporting them, it’s just using basic grammar
by switching it you’re going out of your way to be a dick

Mmmhmm
I don't get why you'd go out of your way to be a dick to trans people, do you really hate them that much?? Also it just makes you look kinda dumb when you purposely misuse grammar to dehumanize them

I wanna shout out my mom, who didn't get it at first while watching project runway (they had a nonbinary model) but after that episode she got it right for the rest of the season and referred to them correctly. If my boomer parents can learn it so can everyone else >.>

p r e a c h

I want some opinions from the trans/NBs in the chat.
Do you have to have body dysphoria in order to be trans/NB? Do you have to have social dysphoria to be trans/NB? Both? Neither? In order for someone to be considered trans/NB, should the criteria be about what makes them dysphoric or what makes them euphoric?

I believe the “criteria” officially is if you experience gender dysphoria either social or physical.
However I get the whole thing with euphoria. I don’t believe you’d be fully trans then, but that doesn’t mean you’re not somewhere on the spectrum.
But idk man, I don’t want to say too much because everyone has their own experience with gender and I don’t want to gatekeep

Makes sense, makes sense

Does anyone know any cool subtle lgbt/bi symbols that I could use as like a jacket patch or something? I’m embroidering patches but I’m not out at home and I’m not putting a whole bi flag on there yet.

Ok I know I'm really late to this BUT there is a neat Instagram shop that sells both prideful and subtle pride pins. Its called The Pin Prick and the Instagram @pinprick.shop

Ohhh thats rad. A lot of it is still directly flag patterns, but i don't mind less subtle stuff in pins i can remove. You see, I'm in that fun little purgatory that is being out at school but not at home.

I did make some more patches btw. They're not pride stuff, but they're cute! It's basically a random snail, the ghost type Pokémon logo, and a fire emblem crest.

D: snails!!

I have like a billion snails lmao
It only felt right to make a cute snail patch to honor them

Y’all this dude on my discord server keeps trying to mock me by saying my name in a really nasally tone while drawing it out, but it just makes me happy that he’s not using my dead name

Hey, So I'm happy that I get to go back to school, but sad part is…all my good friends are going on days I have to be at home. Plus….I feel like I can say this…but I think I'm poly…

HA yes.

I love that

Ahem
I have a dear friend who suffers from physical dysphoria. I'm the type of person who feels quite unattached to my flesh vessel, but my friend is the opposite. What should I say to soothe them? The pain they're in breaks my heart and I have no idea how to console them. I tried suggesting they wear more gender confirming things, but they said it just reminds them of how their body isn't the way they want. If there's anyone who has physical dysphoria/body image issues here, what would you want to hear when the feelings are intense? Anyone can give input though.

right here bb, speaking from experience with a friend's dysphoria and my own body issues. honestly? there's not much you can say/do besides listen. make sure to use the friend's proper pronouns, gender, and name at every opportunity, but it's not something you can persuade or comfort a person out of. dysphoria hurts, and there's no way to catch a break from it. instead, try and distract them in person if you can– go for a walk, cook something, go to the library (wear masks tho, lmao). and probably stay away from mirrors :p

Thanks Velocipede. I definitely try my best in using preferred descriptors, compliments, and pronouns. Unfortunately we haven't been able to see each other since COVID. School's approaching, so I hope we get to do more distracting/uplifting friend outings and stuff. It sucks watching them having been dealt this hand and not truly being able to ease that pain 😞

yes, it's awful. but i'm sure it means a lot to them to have you trying your best to help.

If y’all want some cute rpgs that have lgbtq main characters, may I recommend the studio npckc

i need more poly friends children-

I think I may have a crush on a guy? It's definitely at least a squish, but yeah, that's a new thing
We're pretty good friends, and I do know he's bisexual, but I doubt he reciprocates the feeling
Either way, he's chill
I ain't gonna tell him my feelings though, since I'm not sure of them myself, so instead I'm just gonna say my maybe feelings here