My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

You see, the way it works is the train moves, not the station!

Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent!

You third son of a second wife!

I’m jealous of people that don’t know you!

You known, smarter people than you have been accepted to college. Not many dumber, though.

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.

You keep saying you're intelligent. I don't think that word means what you think it means/

You, sir, are an oxygen thief!

yOU FOUL LOATHSOME EVIL LITTLE COCKROACH

HERMIONE

S.P.E.W.

I don't have the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.

you smelly doo doo head

You're so clumsy you tripped on the cordless phone

Don’t talk out loud, you lower the IQ of the whole street.

Don’t talk out loud, you lower the IQ of the whole street.

That's from Sherlock, right?

Yup ☺️

Ah yes, the actor who plays the character that was directed at was in Rogue One as a pretentious and snobby senator and so he gets that quote applied a lot.

You would struggle to pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel

Actually, not mine, but from Doctor Who:
Person Who I Forgot The Name Of: No, I can't go, there's nothing left for me back on Earth.
The (6th) Doctor: That I can believe.

You keep saying you're intelligent. I don't think that word means what you think it means/

Princess Bride!!!!!

Also, how about this?
"I've been thinking-"
"You've been thinking!? Who are you and what have you done to [Insert the person's name here]!?"

No conversations please and
I mean that wasn't really a insult but ok I guess

They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.

Erm… the last 34 people I said it to counted it as an insult so…. erm…. I guess whatever you say goes but I dunno.

But It was more like a battle cry
but whatever

'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ. Oh, wait, I looked down and couldn't see your IQ. So I guess I'm just jumping down.

If your gonna be two faced, honey at least make one of them pretty.

If you were a book character, you'd be the minor villain that dies a gruesome death.

Shut up, you'll never be the man that your mother is.
(Say this to a woman implies that their mother is masculine, say it to a man implies that the man is not, as it were, manly.)

Talking to you make me want to take a shower

you useless paperclip!