forum Incorrect Quotes 2: Electric Boogaloo

Started July 17, 2020 by @evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

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Ren: Oh, you can drive? When did you get your driver's license?
Chan, starting the car: I didn't!

Meg: What?! The guy had a gun. It was clearly self-defense.
Jay: The guy did not have a gun.
Meg, sighing: Okay, so it was murder. Who cares?

Zephyr: So, are you in a ‘I just need to rest’ kind of bad mood, or are you in a ‘I’m about to smash stuff with a bat’ kind of bad mood?
Ren: [Laying on the floor with a baseball bat clutched on chest] I haven’t decided yet.

Chan, at the doorway of Ren's room: How about this: An inchworm that makes an accordion noise when it moves.
Ren: Chan, go back to bed.

Chan: Wouldn't it be messed up if food could feel things when we ate it?
Lucas: Chan, repeat after me.
Lucas:
Chan:
Lucas:
Chan: But you aren't saying anything?
Lucas: Exactly

Lucas: Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji?
Ren: Huh?
Lucas: To show that I'm unhappy but still cool

Lucas: Is no an emotion? Because I feel it

Ren: This friendship's over. You think everything's a joke
Chan: Knock knock
Ren, sighing: Who's there?
Chan, about to cry: Regret

Elyas: Do you think before you speak?
Chan: Yeah, I think "haha that's funny", and then I say it

Chan: Elyas, I need you to swear-
Elyas: FUCK
Chan:
Chan: Swear as in promise

Jay: It doesn't matter if the glass is half full or half empty. All that matters is if that glass has wine

Peregrine: Officer, I swear, I dropkicked that child in self defense.

Peregrine: When God sends me to Hell, I want him to hesitate.

Alice: Sydney, what are you doing down here in Hell?
Sydney: Because I–
Daisy: Because she fell for me, obviously.

Frost, walking into Alune's lab: How about this: An inchworm that makes an accordion noise when it moves.
Alune: Frost, go back to bed.

Frost: Wouldn't it be messed up if food could feel things when we ate it?
Leaoni: Frost, repeat after me.
Leaoni:
Frost:
Leaoni:
Frost: But you aren't saying anything?
Leaoni: Exactly.

Varian: Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji?
Leaoni: Huh?
Varian: To show that I'm unhappy but still cool.

Takeo: This friendship's over. You think everything's a joke.
Frost: Knock knock.
Takeo, sighing: Who's there?
Frost, about to cry: Regret.

Graham: It doesn't matter if the glass is half full or half empty. All that matters is if that glass has alcohol.

Lynn: I can't believe how drunk you are.
Graham, still holding a bottle of vodka: I am not drunk.
Lynn: Yes you are.
Graham: I am not fucking drunk.
Lynn: Can you tell the time?
Graham: Yes.
Graham: [turns to face the clock on the wall] I am not fucking drunk.

Varian: Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji?
Leaoni: Huh?
Varian: To show that I'm unhappy but still cool.

(Yeeee Varian would like this)

Anthony: Do you ever think before you speak?
Dally: Yeah, I think "haha, that's funny", and then I say it.

Perry: Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji?
Elias: Huh?
Perry: To show that I'm unhappy, but still cool.

Cyrus: When God inevitably sends me to Hell, I want Her to hesitate.

Varian: Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji?
Leaoni: Huh?
Varian: To show that I'm unhappy but still cool.

(Yeeee Varian would like this)

Omg there actually is one. Sad sunglasses emoji is Varian summed up tbh.

Elijah: I unfortunately found out that Aaron saw my secret, so I took the easy step of putting him in jail
Elijah, poking a dog cage Aaron is in: Are you sorry for your crimes

Jax: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Mavis: I never had one.
Jax: An imagination or a childhood?

Skylar: (dials 911)
Skylar: hey I hate to be a Karen but I glued myself to the ceiling again

Charlie: You read my diary?!
Terry: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Blevin: I relate to Belle because she loves books and likes people for who they are!
Lucas: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies

Emma: You're smiling, did something good happen?
Dawn: I can't smile just because I feel like it?
Kelly: Elijah tripped and fell in the parking lot.

Jax, bad at flirting: I like your name
Sophie, equally as bad: Thanks, I got it for my birthday

Sophie: I like your shirt!
Matthew: Thanks (remembers people like bad boys) I stole it (remembers people also like nice guys) from an old man I was helping walk across the street

Jaelynn: If you tear more holes in a net, it would end up having fewer.
Chrystal: STOP

Charlie: (sharpens knife )We've got ways of making people talk.
Colton: (cuts piece of cake)
Terry: …can I have some?
Colton: Cake is for talkers.

Hunter: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Parsley: I never had one.
Hunter: An imagination or a childhood?

Emily: dials 911
Emily: hey I hate to be a Karen but I glued myself to the ceiling again

Hunter: You read my diary?!
Parsley: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Emily: If you tear more holes in a net, it would end up having fewer.
Mara: STOP

Marian: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Beatrice: I never had one.
Marian: An imagination or a childhood?

Ozzie: You read my diary?!
Freddy: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Varian: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Zatian: I never had one.
Varian: An imagination or a childhood?

Alune: You read my diary?
Leaoni: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Sana: I relate to Belle because she loves books and likes people for who they are!
Varian: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies.

Lynn, bad at flirting: I like your name.
Graham, equally as bad: Thanks, I got it for my birthday.

Fenris: I relate to Belle because she loves books and loves people for their souls.
Mark: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies.
Gavin: I relate to Scar, because I'm surrounded by idiots.
Winter: I relate to Kristoff because I too would go on an adventure with someone i barely know and proceed to critique their unhealthy relationship.

Syrus: So I hired an intern for you, hope that's alright with you.
Gavin: Wait, you did wh–
Syrus: Anyways, meet your new nuisance—er, I mean, your new assistance, Francis….uh….Duncan.
Francis: You must be the mind behind it all! I'm Francis Duncan, and you are….?
Gavin: Being punished for something, apparently.

Winter: (sharpens knife) We've got ways of making people talk.
Lena: (cuts piece of cake)
Hayden: …can I have some?
Lena: Cake is for talkers.

Hayden: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Ben: I never had one.
Hayden: An imagination or a childhood?

Lucas: I unfortunately found out that Chan saw my secret, so I took the easy step of putting him in jail
Lucas, poking a dog cage Chan is in: Are you sorry for your crimes

Elyas: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Lucas: I never had one.
Elyas: An imagination or a childhood?

Chan: (dials 911)
Chan: hey I hate to be a Karen but I glued myself to the ceiling again

Elyas: I relate to Belle because she loves books and likes people for who they are!
Chan: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies

Zephyr: You're smiling, did something good happen?
Lucas: I can't smile just because I feel like it?
Ren: Chan tripped and fell in the parking lot.

Abraham: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Dante: I never had one.
Abraham: An imagination or a childhood?

Fantasia: You're smiling, did something good happen?
Kalif: I can't smile just because I feel like it?
Lyra: Nolan tripped and fell in the parking lot.

Bristol: Where are you going?
Cecilia: For cream puffs or to commit a felony, Lyra will decide for me in the car.

Nolan: So I hired an intern for you, hope that's alright with you.
Xavier: Wait, you did wh–
Nolan: Anyways, meet your new nuisance—er, I mean, your new assistance, Kalif….uh….Duncan.
Kalif: You must be the mind behind it all! I'm Kalif Duncan, and you are….?
Xavier: Being punished for something, apparently.

Dante: You read my diary?!
Kalif: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Wes: What?! The guy had a gun. It was clearly self-defense.
Xavier: The guy did not have a gun.
Wes, sighing: Okay, so it was murder. Who cares?

Jackson: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Victor: I never had one.
Geneva: An imagination or a childhood?

Trix: Where are you going?
Ness: For cream puffs or to commit a felony, Lyra will decide for me in the car.
Lyra: Nods enthusiastically

Juniper: So I hired an intern for you, hope that's alright with you.
Titania: Wait, you did wh–
Juniper: Anyways, meet your new nuisance—er, I mean, your new assistance, uh, Clove.
Clove: You must be the mind behind it all! I'm Clove, and you are?
Titania: Being punished for something, apparently.

Oberon: You read my diary?
Titania: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.

Talia: What?! The guy had a gun. It was clearly self-defense.
Portia: The guy did not have a gun.
Talia: Okay, so it was murder. Who cares?

Ava describing Sophie: Your very posture tells me "Here is a woman of true greatness." Either that or "Here are my genitals, please kick them."

Emma: Well, if there is a higher power then why didn't he get you a new coat
Dawn: He's too busy looking for your brain

Jaq: Officer, I swear, I dropkicked that child in self defense.

Uzula: When God sends me to Hell, I want him to hesitate.

Lucas: Is no an emotion? Because I feel it

Morsea: Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey!
Lilac: But I'm a vegan-
Morsea: Wakey wakey, vegetables and sadness.

Jaq: What?! The guy had a gun. It was clearly self-defense.
A guard: The guy did not have a gun.
Jaq, sighing: Okay, so it was murder. Who cares?

Quill: I relate to Belle because she loves books and likes people for who they are!
Azazel: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies.

Drinn: Do you miss the imagination of childhood?
Vio: I never had one.
Drinn: An imagination or a childhood?

(this is basically just the exposition of my story lmao)
Cyrus: Hey, Kane, I hired a new intern! I hope that's alright with you.
Anthony: Wait, you did wh–
Cyrus: Anyways, meet your new nuisance—er, I mean, your new assistance, uh, Quill.
Quill: You must be the mind behind it all! I'm Quill Twycross, and you are….?
Anthony: Being punished for something, apparently.

Tetra: You're smiling, did something good happen?
Zephyr: I can't smile just because I feel like it?
Poli: Vio tripped and fell in the parking lot.

Tamaki: What did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe?
Dollie: Mitosis
Luca: I want to die.
Dollie: This is the joke that will bring back Jesus Christ

Tamaki: I JUST SWALLOWED THE WIRE FROM MY BRACE
Tamaki: PLEASE HELP-
Dollie: I was gonna say 'brace yourself' but it looks like you've already swallowed that pun.
Tamaki: DO NOT-

Amber: Who needs ghosts? Haunt your own house. Wander around your own living room wailing and crying
Dollie: I already do- Ghosts hate me because I do their job for them.
Sanri: Millennials killing the haunting industry.

Dollie:
Luca: Um, Dollie, could you maybe not?
Dollie:
Dollie: Jokes on you, dickhead, I didn't say anything.

Martha: What did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe?
Jackson: Mitosis
Victor: I want to die.
Martha: This is the joke that will bring back Jesus Christ!

Vivian: Who needs ghosts? Haunt your own house. Wander around your own living room wailing and crying
Lavinia: I already do. Ghosts hate me because I do their job for them.
Lucas: Mortals killing the haunting industry.

Camille, at her funeral: Before we continue this funeral, I'd like to thank our sponsor Raid Shadow Legends

Sophie: Yes
Micheal: No

Valerie: a positive and negative charge convined is neutral, if someone is negative to you CHOP THEM IN THE THROAT THIS AIN´T PHYSICS

Flashback!Colton: Elijah has 19 bottles of soap and he gives-
Child!Charlie: wait, why does Elijah have so many bottle of soap?
Child!Elijah: MIND YOUR OWN BUSSINESS CHARLIE!

Claire: I´ll saw you hanging out with Charlie!
Darnell: Claire, is not what it seems!
Claire, pulling out a gun. I WONT HESITATE BITCH

Lucas: So for all the new viewers who came here there, there's a ghost in the house
Camille: (bumps into something)
Lucas: O_o

Skylar to a random employee: My email is [email protected]

All of these are from Shit People Have Said On Discord™

Azazel: I think we should all get to know each other better. What’s everyone’s favorite drug?
Quill: Melatonin.

Cyrus: I don’t know about you guys, but I’m headed either straight to Hell or Valhalla.

Cyrus: Why am I depressed? I did not consent to this emotion like what the fuck???

Vio: How do I turn down my emotions?
Drinn: Okay, so first go to settings.
Vio: And then?
Drinn: Flip every switch you can find and hope for the best. I don’t know, man, nothing’s labeled in there.

Dally: If my funeral doesn’t have Mad World playing, I won’t be attending.
Cyrus: Imagine attending your own funeral. Cringe.
Jack, who’s immortal: Y’all having funerals?

Quill: I would honestly be happy just lying in a pile of paper shreds.

Anthony: Do you like cilantro? Some people can’t taste it properly.
Cyrus, taking a piece of cilantro: Pfff, imagine being a nerd who can’t taste cilantro properly.
Cyrus: Puts it in her mouth and immediately spits it out in disgust

Elias: Cool new game show idea: Are You Smarter Than Five Gay Rats?
Perry: Probably not.
Perry: Wait, no, I am a gay rat.

Geneva: I think we should all get to know each other better. What’s everyone’s favorite drug?
Victor: Melatonin.

Della: Why am I depressed? I did not consent to this emotion like what the fuck???

Addie: I would honestly be happy just lying in a pile of paper shreds.

Marisol: Do you like cilantro? Some people can’t taste it properly.
Harper, taking a piece of cilantro: Pfft, imagine being a nerd who can’t taste cilantro properly.
Harper: Puts it in her mouth and immediately spits it out in disgust

Douglas: Cool new game show idea: Are You Smarter Than Five Gay Rats?
Oscar: Probably not.
Oscar: Wait, no, I am a gay rat.

Takeo: I don't eat them because they're shaped like dinosaurs. I eat them because they're fucking chicken nuggets!

Frost, after upsetting Sana: I didn't mean to do that.
Sana: No, it's fine, don't worry about it.
Leaoni, bursting into the room: No! It's not fine, what the fu-

Takeo: Oh god, you're bleeding a lot, what do i do?
Frost: Apply pressure.
Takeo: Ah, okay, uh - listen here you dumb bitch, if you don't stop bleeding right now you're gonna fucking die.
Frost: Wrong kind of pressure!

Madam Margo: Marcello, you better clean up this mess right now!
Marcello:…what mess?
Madam Margo: What mess?
Madam Margo: [points at Varian] You see that right there?!?!

Wren: So, what are you doing for Valentine's day?
Leaoni: Sleeping. Sleeping the whole day.

Takeo, staring at a wasp that got inside: Listen, i don't want any trouble.
Wasp: [flies in his direction]
Takeo: [screams and flings himself out the window]

Graham: Aren't you wanted by the state?
Varian: I'm wanted by a lot of people, okay? That's the price of being pretty.

Frost: [sneezes]
Leaoni: Oh my god, shut the hell up.

Lynn: Come on Gray, we have to go!
Graham, lying on the floor with sunglass on, listening to Elvis songs: Leave me alone to die.

Leaoni: If the human body doesn't get water, it will die.
Alune, taking the bottle of vodka away: I hate to break it to you but this is is not water.
Leaoni: No, but it's a liquid.

Samuel: How did you get in? The door's locked!
Nich, shrugging: Back door's not.

Teagan: I don't eat them because they're shaped like dinosaurs. I eat them because they're fucking chicken nuggets!

Kay: Oh gods, you're bleeding a lot, what do I do?
Eliot: Apply pressure.
Kay: Ah, okay, uh - listen here you dumbass, if you don't stop bleeding right now you're gonna fucking die.
Eliot: Wrong kind of pressure!

Harper: So, what are you doing for Valentine's Day?
Beck: Sleeping. Sleeping the whole day.

Samuel: Aren't you wanted by their government?
Nich: I'm wanted by a lot of people, okay? That's the price of being pretty. And also the price of crime.