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"And we won't," Halm said gently. He held Nix, gently kissing his head. "Everyone is going to make sure he's safe right now."
"And we won't," Halm said gently. He held Nix, gently kissing his head. "Everyone is going to make sure he's safe right now."
"But Zachary can't now… we fucked him up too, and that's going to fuck Cas up even more. He needs Zachary."
"Zachary will still be able to be here for Cas. Even if he can't do the same things as before for now, he can still keep Cas safe. We couldn't stop him if we tried. We just… We just have to help them both." Halm closed his eyes, then opened them to look at Zachary and Cas.
Nix sighed shakily. "Is he going to have any memory damage? What if he doesn't remember Cas?" He asked, his voice seeped in worry.
"He doesn't, I promise. I… I had to put the the memories I had taken back, though. But he won't tell Cas, I'm sure. He knows his memory was messed with, and will know that the same happened to Cas. He wouldn't… Wouldn't dare shatter Cas too." He better not, or Halm would kill Zachary himself.
Nix nodded a bit. "Right… it would be really, really bad if Cas shattered… he wouldn't handle it as well as I expect Zachary to, which probably won't be great either."
"It won't," Halm admitted. "He's… He's really messed up. I'm so sorry…"
Nix buried his face in Halm's chest with a soft groan. "What are we going to do?" He asked weakly.
"I… We have to focus to helping Zachary." Halm looked back at Nix, kissing the top of his head.
"But we still need to keep a close eye on Cas, too. We need to take care of them both."
Nix nodded a bit, gripping the fabric of Halm's shirt tightly. "I don't want Cas to hurt himself again because of this… he's been doing so well."
"We'll make sure he's okay. We'll… He has his replacements. We'll make sure he has a better way to let those feelings out." Halm wrapped his arms more tightly around Nix, rubbing his back and head.
"I'm worried that his replacements won't be enough for him… he's going to be under a lot of emotional distress, Halm. He's not going to handle this well at all."
"I'll know whenever he… Whenever he doesn't use his replacements. We can help him." Halm was still worried. He knew Zachary would need a lot of rest to recuperate from this.
Nix nodded weakly, keeping his face hidden. "I wish we could just… fix him, you know? Fix his mind… he's been broken by so many people."
"We can't," Halm said gently. "For me to do that, I would have to take away all of his memories. He wouldn't be Cas anymore…" Halm let out a small, defeated sigh.
Nix sighed again. "What about when he dies? Do you think it would be better for him to have a fresh start, even if he wouldn't really be Cas anymore?"
"I… I think it would be. He… He'd be so much better off…" Halm rubbed his face a little, eyes closed.
"Then I would be able to patch him back together. To fix him. I could do it with him keeping his memories, but… He'd be as fragile as glass. He would need constant monitoring while he continued to heal."
"Yeah… He could keep his name, and maybe his appearance as well. We can raise him up the way he should have been. I… hopefully he'll be happier…"
Halm nodded.
"He can have the life he deserved." Halm gently kissed Nix's head.
"Mhmm… he deserves so much better than what he's gotten. We can't let anything hurt him again if we can help it."
"And we'll be able to. He'll be here, with us. He'll be safe…" Halm looked at Cas again as he slept.
"He'll be safe," he said again, softer now.
Nix nodded a bit. "Should we have him reincarnated as like… a baby? I'm not sure if either of us know how to take care of a baby…"
"It might be best for him. We can study. Get help. Well make it work, it'll be worth it for him." Halm gently kissed Nix's head again.
"Mhmm… do you know anyone who's raised children before? Maybe we could ask somebody…?" Nix suggested.
"I know one of the other gods who had, yes," Halm confirmed. "We can ask her."
"When should we do that? We wouldn't necessarily have to do it soon… hopefully Cas will live for many more years."
"We don't have to for a long time. We'll go to her just before he gets reborn, okay? She'll help us while he's a baby too." Halm gently rubbed Nix's head.
Nix nodded and leaned into Halm's hand. "Alright… what's her name?" He asked. "Can… can we trust her?"
"Her name is Serna. And yes, we can trust her. She is a good person, I promise." Halm held Nix close, sratching behind his ears.
"Alright… if you trust her, then I'll trust your judgement. I'd like to meet her at some point, though. Preferably soon, even if we're not talking about child stuff."
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