Finn bit his lip and started making the sandwiches. "It's- I understand. I'm really sorry. None of this is fair for you. I can-we can be friends in school if you want. I wasn't planning on ignoring you. I'm just…scared. I always wanted to meet my soulmate but I wasn't expecting it to happen so soon," He said his eyes watering slightly but he finished off the first sandwich.
"It's not your fault, Finn. I just…I sort of had a dream that my soulmate would be somebody who would sweep me off my feet and protect me. And I realize you can't do that because of your aunt, and it isn't your fault." He took a deep breath, steadying himself. "Being friends would be…I don't know. I want to be, but I don't know if I can because I'll just get my hopes up over and over and over, and I don't want to do that to myself."
(Gtg to bed now. Good night!)
(Good night!)
Finn turned around placing the plated grilled cheese on the counter. He looked down at jay. "I still want to protect you. I'm really trying to figure something out so you don't- I really don't want to see you get hurt."
Jay nodded a little. "I know you are. Like I said, it isn't your fault." He gave a tiny, rueful smile. "I just…I might need some time to separate what I wanted from reality. And…please don't take this the wrong way. It isn't your fault, and I'm not blaming you or anything. I just…might need some time and space."
Finn nodded. “Ok I can make that happen. You can still stay here as long as you need and I’ll make sure the guest rooms free for you,” He said finishing the second grilled cheese. He didn’t let any tears fall from his eyes as he sat down at the counter.
Jay bit his lip. He got up and gave Finn a quick hug. "I'm sorry if I hurt you." he said quietly.
Fun hugged him back. “It’s ok I’m fine. Why don’t we eat?” He asked. Letting go of Jay.
Jay stepped back, and nodded, sitting down again.
Finn placed one of the plates in front of him and the other In front of himself. He wasn’t very hungry anymore. He glanced at Jay.
Jay bit his lip again. I don't know what to say. "I'm sorry." he said softly.
“I already said it’s fine. It’s not your fault anyway,” Finn said finally taking a bite of his sandwich looking away from Jay.
"But i hurt you anyway, didn't I." Jay replied softly. "Or is there a different reason you won't look at me?"
"You didn't hurt me the situation we're in is just messed up but the majority f that is my fault," Finn admits his gingers tapping on the counter. He looked back at Jay.
"No it's not. Not your fault, I mean." Jay replied. "I put…too many hopes on this." His fingers traced the mark on his cheek. "And it wasn't fair of me to expect you to just be able to drop everything else for me. It's my fault for putting too many expectations on that."
The cream's effect was starting to waver. He could see Jay's mark glow and if he looked down he'd see his as well. Finn bit his lip. "I'm the one who crushed your hopes. I shouldn't have expected you to have been fine with essentially ignoring it."
"I raised them too high in the first place." Jay replied with a shrug. "I guess I just…my parents aren't soulmates, and I've seen their relationship and what it's like…and I don't ever want that." He shook his head a little.
Finn's hands clenched slightly. "I-you won't have to. I can promise that," Finn said still looking right at Jay.
Jay nodded a little. "Okay." He sighed softly. "I'm sorry, I've made everything awkward and weird now, haven't I?"
Finn shook his head. "It's good to talk about these things. It would have grown more awkward if we didn't."
He shrugged. "Yeah…but I didn't give you any warning. Sorry."
"You told me you wanted to talk. I assumed it would be about something like this," Finn said unclenching his fist.
"Oh." Jay took a small bite of the sandwich. He had noticed the clenched fist, but hadn't said a word.
Finn ate his sandwich. Quickly finishing it and bringing his dish to the sink. He stayed silent, not sure what to say.
Jay ate his sandwich. He crossed his ankles under the chair.
Finn washed his dish not really wanting to leave the room.
Jay finished eating, and brought his plate over to Finn. "Here." he said.
"Thank you," Finn said taking the plate. His hand brushed against Jays. He set his washed dish on the drying rack.
Jay nodded, and bit his lip at the touch. Part of him ached to reach out and take Finn's hand, but another part knew it would only cause trouble.
Finn's hand was glowing brightly. He wanted things to just be normal. So he could hold his soulmate hand and he and Jay could be happy. He finished up the dishes avoiding looking at Jay.
Jay swallowed, and stepped back to try and control his urge to take Finn's hand.