Elle’s POV:
I stood outside the classroom door for a while, unable to make myself enter. My feet had grown roots, anchoring me to the ground, preventing me from taking a single step forwards and towards the source of my pain.
Colton.
Colton was in there. I didn’t know whether to be happy, or run in the opposite direction. But eventually, I forced my limbs to move, forces my fingers to wrap around the handle and push open the door.
I looked up the second the door opened and Elle stepped in, her eyes meeting mine. As cheesy as it sounded, I felt my heart stop the second we made eye contact. Everything around me slowed until the only thing I was aware of her.
I wished I didn’t have this curse. I desired to hold her in my arms again, to kiss her till her lips became pink and swollen. I yearned to hear my name slip from her mouth in affection. I could not have any of it because of the monster inside of me.
And as much as it broke me, I turned my head away just as her roommates followed in behind her, taking in a shaky breath and releasing it. I forced a blanket of my usual cold expression on my face. I willed my heart to still—to stop its constant breaking. How was it possible to crumble more than I already had?
I wanted this. I made this happen. I wouldn’t regret my decision. I did this for her and I would see it through.
But despite my resolve, the longing to bask in her warmth was too much to take.
How long must I suffer like this?
The beginning of class was a nightmare. Every second of my time was devoted to absolute concentration, to holding back to flood of water that threatened to burst from the walls in response to my turmoil of emotions. The one time my eyes found Colton's, creaks and groans erupted around us, causing the whole class to jump in surprise. Meanwhile, I was an absolute mess, fighting back tears, fervently battling the urge to grab Colton by the front of the shirt and crush my mouth against his.
Please, Cole, I'm begging you, I thought over and over again, my knuckles whitening from the force with which I was gripping the sides of my chair. I was writing letters to him in my head now, spinning an imaginary web of words around myself in the useless hope that things would change. That he would see how badly he was damaging the both of us everything.
I don't know how much longer I can last…..
I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the creaks and groans of pipes in the walls. Elle. Of course it was Elle—who could it be? I knew what she wanted me to do. I knew what she desired—but I couldn’t offer it to her. Not if I wanted her to live. Not if I wanted to protect her.
I wish she would realize how much it was killing me, too, to be so close to her, yet achingly far away. The distance between us was increasing— but I hoped she wouldn’t let it consume her.
“Your Highness,” I looked at the teacher, careful to keep my mask from crumbling. “You’re familiar with mediums, aren’t you?”
I nodded, maintaining eye contact.
“What about the others? Have you had the chance to teach the others?”
“No,” I answered in a rather dull tone in constraint to his sweet voice. “Only Elliot—“ that’s not her name “—but no one else.”
Altair hummed thoughtfully before he nodded.
“All right. Then I will explain,” he walked over to the front of the class, looking at everyone, his careful, sharp eyes looking at each and every student. “A medium is any object that you can infuse your magic with. It can be a stone, a piece of jewelry—it can even be a stationary. A medium, however, cannot be a weapon. Mainly, they are used to store energy until they’re needed again, which you can either directly use, or absorb it back.”
He paused, quirked an eyebrow before he began again.
“Your medium can only be controlled by you. For Healers, when they heal, they transfer their energy into their patients’—but during the transfer, their energy is broken down to mimic the patient’s. Mediums, however, do not break down your energy into simple flowing energy. It keeps its form, which is why the only person it can be controlled by is the owner,” students took notes, carefully writing down what Altair was saying. The Elite slowly walked towards me again and set a white stone on my desk. I quirked an eyebrow, pretending I found his actions amusing. “Prince Colton, since you have the most talent amongst students in here, could you demonstrate?”
I made sure not to make my mask crumble. My energy was dark, unlike theirs. If I turned this stone into a medium… it would turn black.
My whole body went rigid. No, I thought desperately, He can't do that. His magic's gone dark—they'll find out. But what could I do? I was barely able to look at him without crumbling to pieces, much less defend him. There was nothing to do but wait…… and hope he had some kind of plan.
I picked up the stone, twirling it around my fingers. What could I do to hide the fact that I’ve been corrupted? He was a teacher—he was bound to know the difference between normal energy and dark matter.
I thought of suggesting another student. I already knew how to do it, so there wasn’t any point, right? But I was the prince. As a student, the spotlight falls on me first. It always does.
So I carefully broke my energy down, converting it to a black flame. No matter which flame I conjured, the energy would always be black. After all, it was energy. This time, the only difference was that I already had a flame that could resemble the dark color of my energy.
I slowly pushed it in, watching the white stone change colors until it was dark as the night sky, resembling a coal. It felt hot—I filled it to the core. Altair blinked at me, as if surprised.
“Why is the energy black, Your Highness?” He questioned curiously, reaching out to take my medium. He observed it, furrowing his eyebrows.
“Black flames,” I responded, resting my cheek on the palm of my hands. “I converted my energy to a black flame before I transferred it.” I reached out for the stone again, tapping it and watching it burst into flames, the dark color pouring off of it like smoke, tickling my hand. “Is that not what you wanted me to show, Professor? How mere objects can be turned into weapons?”
Altair smiled and nodded.
“That’s correct,” he replied, turning his back on me and walking to the front. “Each of you have a similar stone on your desk. A stone is the easiest object to turn into a medium. Elliot, the prince mentioned you know of mediums. How do you know you’ve filled their capacity?”
My shoulders sagged in relief—of course he'd been able to think of a way around his problem. He was Colton—making convincing stories up on the spot while acting completely nonchalant was what he did best.
Well. There was something else he did better…. But I refused to think about it. The memory of his warm, soft lips brushing against mine was much too painful to relive.
When the new teacher came to a stop in front of me, I barely managed to hear and comprehend his question through the combined force of my intense concentration and the blood roaring in my ears. Willing my voice not to shake, I delivered my answer in the steadiest way possible. "They heat up, sir. When they're at their hottest, it means you're done."
Altair nodded in approval. I, too, felt satisfied. Elle never forgot whatever she learned. She was too smart. She knew too much and she still yearned to know more. I hoped that aspect of her never changed. I wanted her to be herself, even if it meant I wouldn’t be there to see it.
“Now, each of you will take the stone,” the teacher instructed. “Turn it into a medium. Once you’re done, bring it up to my desk. Remember—focus is essential. Hot means you’ve reached its limit. Go further than that, and there might be dangerous consequences. You have the rest of the class for this. You may start.”
I rubbed my thumb over the white pebble in front of me, sighing deeply. After a moment, I recalled what Colton had taught me when I'd transferred Scylla's energy into the ring—the one I hadn't been able to take off once Colton had left me—but this time, I removed Colton from the mental scene entirely, replacing him with a teacher. It was much easier that way, considering the fact that the mere thought of him sent bile up my throat.
My magic flowed through my hand and into the stone like a warm stream. Slowly, the stone began to heat up and shift colours until it was a beautiful shade of turquoise. I cut off the energy supply once I felt it burn, searing a faint mark into my hand, but the pain sharpened my focus rather than fractured it, which left me with a rather nice-looking medium and a (hopefully) pleased teacher.
I couldn’t take my eyes off of Elle. To others, it might seem like I was merely observing her. To them, I was her teacher. Somewhat. When she was done, she walked over to the teacher and showed off her medium.
Altair looked proud.
“Well done,” he said, nodding in satisfaction as he held up the medium. “Look at the perfectly glowing stone. This is what a medium should look like. Not too dim, and not too bright. And it’s perfectly warm, too. I didn’t expect any less from you, Elliot.”
"Thank you, sir," I answered politely and without emotion, too exhausted from trying to stitch my broken pieces together to force a drop of false pride into my voice.
Once class was over, I was ready to leave quickly. Key was waiting for me in the field. We were meant to practice together. Walking past Elle and her roommates—as well as trying hard not to look at her and her soft mouth, I exited the classroom, keeping up the cool atmosphere despite the raging storm inside of me.
Andreas's grip on my arm tightened significantly as Colton passed by, but I was quickly pushing him away. "I—I'll be right back," I told him and Kaden unsteadily, turning and running after Colton before they could stop me. "Wait—Cole!"
I immediately froze the second I heard her call my name. It still felt magical. How was it that someone could hold such power, and through a name no less?
I didn’t want to talk to her. I didn’t want to see her. I knew I would crumble if I did. I would want to kiss her, devour her until she melted in my arms.
“Elle,” I said her name softly, as if it was a nickname. Where were her roommates? “You shouldn’t be here.”
Why couldn't he open his eyes and see that we were better off together? That he was endangering so many lives by forcing distance between us?
"I'm here anyways," I whispered, reaching out a tentative hand to tug on his sleeve. "Talking to the boy who's breaking me apart."
I snatched her hand in mine, eyes narrowing. Her words scratched my heart like nails on a back, the desperation in her voice nearly making me give up.
“You know why I’m doing this,” I said to her, loosening my hold. Her hand felt small in my hold. It was too soft. I loved holding it, but I knew I couldn’t. “And we can’t talk here, but I’m not taking you anywhere else.”
The simple touch sent the whole world spinning out of my control. Heart pounding, I barely managed to stitch together a coherent reply.
"I do know why you're doing this. But I also know that if I hadn't been there this morning, you would have become corrupted again. By forcing us apart, your endangering both yourself and everyone around you."
And you're breaking my heart. Please, Colton, listen to me.
“I don’t care,” I sighed, trying to force myself to let go of her hand. “I don’t care if the world was in flames, if I let everyone around me burn into nothing. As long as you’re safe amongst the fire, nothing else matters to me. I cannot and will not let you stay even an inch near me. There’s no way am I going to let him touch you again.”
I only tightened my grip on his rest, forcing my powers into submission. Windsong rose like bile to the back of my throat, but I swallowed it back down, determined to keep control. "He's going to touch me if he comes back, and you can't stop him. You're hurting me in more ways than one while trying to keep me safe."
When she tightened her grip on my hand, I swallowed. I only hoped she didn’t see it—didn’t see how much effort I had to put in to keep myself together. My eyes darted around, sighing when I realized she wasn’t going to stop. We couldn’t talk here—not when there were ears on the walls.
I pulled her along to where I knew we wouldn’t be followed. I should have paid more attention.
Once we were truly alone, I pressed her against the wall.
“I think that’s better than having you wounded, or dead,” I replied to what she had said earlier thickly. “I’ll stop him, or I’ll die trying. I don’t want to hurt you, Elle. I don’t want to be the reason you have bruises on you. I certainly don’t want you ending up in the same situation as I am in, and I will not have you close to a monster where getting hurt may as well be inevitable.”
For a moment, all I could feel were Colton's hands, pressing me to the wall. My breath caught in my throat as the illusion of control I'd managed to maintain began to crumble, taking my limited control on my powers with it.
"You don't understand, do you?" I whispered, struggling to keep the tremors from my voice.
Kaden’s POV:
Andreas and I followed after them as Colton dragged Elliot away, careful not to make our presence known.
“I don’t want to hurt you—“ Colton started and Andreas almost lost it, getting out of our hiding spot before I stopped him right as the prince continued. “—El. I don’t want to be the reason you have bruises on you. I certainly don’t want you to be in the same situation as I am in—“
I blinked. What were they talking about? What situation was he in? Was he seriously being like this? I motioned to Andreas. If he raised a hand against Elliot, we’d jump in. I wanted to know what his business was once and for all.
Colton’s POV:
“No, Elle, it’s you who doesn’t understand,” I gently cupped her cheeks, not being able to resist myself as I pressed our foreheads together. “I’m doing this to protect you, even if you don’t see why. You won’t make this decision for yourself, so I have to be the one to do it. The pain would be considerably less as compared to what you’d go through if you stayed with me. Do you know how much just the thought of him having his hands on you infuriated me? Just how much I want to tear myself to shreds just so I can protect you? Elle, I would destroy the world if it meant you’d be safe. I would kill and kill and never stopped if the universe promised to keep you safe. I love you more than life itself and that’s why I can’t keep you close. That’s why you have to leave, and if I have to make your roommates believe I’m the one abusing you to make them despise me, I will do it. If it means they’ll keep you away from me, I’ll do it.” I couldn’t help but gently press our lips together for a second or two, desperation coursing through me. “You got hurt because you were with me this morning. Had you not been there, he wouldn’t have raised a hand against you. He wouldn’t have been agitated. But because you forced him away, he wants you dead, and I know one single command from that bitch is all it would take for him to do it and I don’t want that. At least if you’re away from me, I can focus on the thought of protecting you, and it’ll keep him away. So please, love, understand. Understand why I can’t let you be close to me. Understand why I’m so desperate to keep us apart.”
Andreas's POV:
The more I listened, the more confused I became. And the more confused I became, the more I feared the man on the other side of the wall I had my ear pressed against. No, that wasn't quite right—it was a horribly conflicting mixture of fearing him and fearing for him. At first, I was enraged, assuming that the whole story was an abuser's lie, one fabricated to keep Elliot close. But no—that didn't make sense. Colton wasn't trying to reel my best friend in, he was trying to push him away. Furthermore, he was playing the part of the abuser in front of Kaden and I in order to….. protect his lover?
And the way he talked to him…… There was no way in hell he was that could at acting. Nobody could fabricate the love and care with which I had just witnessed the Prince using towards my best friend. It wasn't possible.
But now, there was the issue of what was actually happening. Colton kept referring to a 'bitch' and 'him', usually in the same sentence that he spoke about himself. Suddenly, I recalled what Elliot had claimed earlier; that it wasn't Colton who was hurting him, but someone else….. in his body.
I turned my eyes to Kaden, searching his face for a reaction.
Elle's POV:
"Colton—" I buried my face in his chest, an ocean of tears blurring my vision. The fact that he was trying to protect me by doing the very thing that would hurt me the most made the whole situation infinitely worse. But the only thing I could bring myself to say in response was a weak argument, a last resort. "You—You're trying not to hurt me by doing the one thing that would tear me apart."
Kaden’s POV:
I didn’t understand. If this was truly a play… what was the Prince trying accomplish by fabricating such a lie? I couldn’t—even I felt myself believing what he was saying. He was pushing Elliot away. Why? Because he was afraid someone would hurt Elliot? Because of him?
I shook my head. Maybe I heard wrong. After all, what would the Prince want from Elliot? There wasn’t anything Elliot could offer him—unless it was his powers he was searching for? Unless he wanted to use Elliot because he was like him? Still… the way he was talking to my best friend… the way his voice turned desperate and gentle and full of love. And he way he spoke about keeping him safe…
Then I remembered. Elliot said it wasn’t Prince Colton who had hurt her. If that was the case, then…
My eyes widened. No.
“Dark magic…” I found myself mouthing.
Colton’s POV:
I wrapped my arms around her just as tightly, kissing the top of her head as if it was the last.
“You will get better,” I promised her gently. “I promise. I love you so goddamn much, Elle, and it’s hard for me to let you go, too, but understand. I don’t want to wake up one day and find you dead because I couldn’t keep him away. That’s my worst nightmare. I’ll go away—I’ll keep myself as far apart from you as possible… and when I’m king… maybe if you’ll still want me, Elle, I’ll make you my queen. But till then… I want you to be happy and you can be happy without a monster like me.”
Andreas’s POV:
The two, earth-shattering words that Kaden mouthed in my direction shook me to the core, but their impact was nothing compared to the shock and alarm that shot through me the moment that Colton referred to Elliot as his queen. My eyes flew open.
What???
Elle’s POV:
My whole body shook from the force of my barely suppressed sobs. I clung to Cole as if my life depended on him, as if I would disappear the moment I let go.
“I will always want you,” I promised in a tiny, trembling voice. “And I want you now. I—I refuse to believe that you’re a monster—I will never believe that. And I also don’t believe that I can be nearly as happy without you. I’ve never said it to you before, Colton, but I love you. More than you could possibly imagine. You can’t just—You can’t give me a taste of paradise, then rip it away after you swore that you would stay.”
Kaden’s POV:
I felt like someone had slapped me in my sleep and then doused me in cold water, but it was a hundred times more shocking than the actual thing.
Queen. The prince just referred to Elliot as his queen. Did that mean what I think it means…?
Shit. No wonder he refused to shower with us, or change his bandages or even take off his bloody shirt. Because he was a girl all along.
Colton’s POV:
I froze the second those words left her mouth. I love you. Did I hear that right? Did this perfect being before me, this woman in my arms just tell me she loved me?
“Elle…” I broke off, her sobs tearing me apart. I held her tighter, resting my chin on her head. “I’m sorry. Please understand… I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to be the reason why you get hurt. There’s not even a single part of me that doesn’t want to keep holding you like this—you are the first girl I’ve loved and you will always, always be in my heart but what good is my love if I can’t even keep you safe? If being with me can guarantee nothing but heartbreak and pain, what good am I? I swore, yes, but I never believed the next day my hand would be around your throat, and the thought of it terrifies me. I may not be a monster to you right now, but I can’t just wait around for the day I’ll become one in your eyes.”
Elle’s POV:
I beat my fist weakly against his chest, frustration, panic, and desperation filling me to the rim until I was overflowing with tears and pathetic pleas. “You are hurting me!” I finally blurted, taking him by the front of his shirt. “By leaving, you’re hurting me more than you ever could if you stayed. The healers can make bruises disappear in a matter of seconds, but they can do nothing to fix emotion damage. You can die of a broken heart—did you know that? The sinews holding the muscle together can snap under intense hormonal releases. You’re not going to find me dead because you are strong enough to push him back before he does something like that. And besides that—whoever’s controlling you needs me. The farther you are form me, the more desperate they’ll get, and the harder they’ll push. More people will get hurt, including me. You’re telling me that you don’t want to hurt me in the same breath that you take the heart I trusted you with and smash it into tiny, unrecognizable pieces.”
My voice shook almost as violently as my hands did, and it only grew worse as I finished off the charged speech. “Please, Colton, if you value me at all—you’ll stay. If you don’t care…”
Andreas’s POV:
I felt like I was suffocating.
The ‘scars’ that Elliot claimed to have on his chest and body. His first fight with Colton. His refusal to shower alongside the rest of the boys.
‘His’——I kept referring to him—to her—as a boy. But Elliot wasn’t that. My own best friend, and I hadn’t even known their gender until now.
Colton’s POV:
I responded by slamming our lips together, squeezing my eyes shut and holding her face gently despite the rough kiss I just pushed her into. All of my self-control shattered. I couldn’t refuse her—not anymore. Was it possible for someone to hold such power over me? I was the prince. There was only one person who could command me without controlling me, and that was the King. Yet this female… this female made me want to kneel before her. She made me want to wrap my arms around her, kiss her senseless, and it was absolutely my own desires. I desired her. I wanted her and there was no one who could force me otherwise.
I kissed her harshly, devouring her mouth, showing off every single desperation I had felt. I pushed all of my emotions in that kiss—I didn’t want to let her go. She was my lifeline and without her, I was lost. Without her, I was good as dead.
“If I lose you, it will be like death for me,” I whispered harshly against her mouth. “So I swear, Elle… if I ever lose control… if you ever get hurt because of me… I will not look back. I will walk away from your life because all I am good for is destruction and your life is more important to me than anything else in the world. I don’t care about anything else as long as your life is protected.”
I belonged to this woman—I was subjected to her and only her and to hell with this curse of mine. To hell with the dark magic. She would be the only one, I, Prince Colton Miller, would respond to.
And if she gets hurts, I will remove myself from her life, because she deserves one that can give her happiness.
My body went completely slack beneath his, giving way as a soft cry of relief escaped from my mouth. He was listening. He was staying. My Colton was coming back to me and drawing me into the one place I would always belong; his arms.
My head spun from the sheer force and desperation behind the kiss. My thundering heart, whipped into a frenzy by the feeling of his lips all over mine, only served to fuel the turmoil of emotions that reared up within me.
Colton.
My mind filled with static as I went weak in his arms, parting my lips in a silent invitation. I needed him, needed him to kiss me until I passed out in his arms. Until my heart burst. Until the day I died. After a few short hours, I’d been reduced to this. To an absolute wreck.
And I couldn’t care less.
I kissed her as if my life depended on it—which it did. I didn’t know when I would turn. I didn’t know how long it would take to come back. I didn’t know how strong I would be—if I would be able to fight it.
But right now, with her wrapped around me, her mouth claiming mine, her actions screaming with need, I had a feeling I would be strong enough to hold on. The touch of her lips on mine, her skin against mine, the way her mouth moved desperately against mine and her lips pulsed and prodded mine—if I remembered the feelings these simple actions gave me, I had no doubt I would survive.
When she opened her mouth for me, I complied, exploring her mouth. I could not, for the life of me, get used to tasting her. Kissing her was like taking a drug. She was supersonic. Her kiss was cosmic. She was magnetizing. The more I pushed her away, the harder she pulled me back. She was from a whole another world and she was special and she was mine.
I desired to pledge myself to her—a promise from a king to his queen. Or in this case, a promise from a prince to his lover. I pulled away from her slowly, desperate to have her mouth on me again, her tongue fighting for dominance, her hands around my body. I slowly knelt down to one knee, my head bowed, a fist over my heart.
“I, Prince Colton, future king of Alsmeria, pledge my utmost loyalty, devotion and love to you. I subject myself to you—I will protect you with my dying breath. I will love you, care for you, fight for you by your side,” I pledged to her, before adding an extra verse. “And if I bring danger upon you, I will walk away from your life until I repent for my sins. This is my King’s vow to you, Elle Amberly.”