Lewis choked back tears. He leaned into Sienne, trying not to let his fear and anxiety show, but failing. Why am I falling apart like this? He wondered frantically, almost more bothered by the idea of showing his emotions surrounding his deep-running insecurity than the insecurity itself. He wondered if he should share. Lewis trusted Sienne, but he didn't know that he wanted to place the weight of his problems on her shoulders, or that he wanted anyone, for that matter to understand his most closely held fear.
Sienne pulled Lewis tighter and patted his back again, hoping she could help him somehow. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but knew he needed the comfort she was giving him with her hugging him at that moment.
"I'm sorry… I'm so, so sorry…" he murmured, "I shouldn't even be going on a quest, and I don't know why anyone trusts- oh…" He realized he was just talking, and since they were hugging, he didn't face her, and Sienne couldn't lipread like that. He stopped talking and just stayed in her embrace. It wasn't much, but it was comforting.
Sienne sat there to comfort Lewis, she couldn't do much else. She stayed there for Lewis, not letting go until he did. She felt he needed her there.
Lewis pulled away a little bit, now filled with rage more than anything. How dare a goddess who was supposed to represent mercy, of all things, be the one to bring him to his knees. He signed, "Give me a moment." Then, Lewis got up and looped around the tree. He was screaming curses at Eleos for doing this to him, for reminding him of his pain and fear right as he was being asked to be strong. He turned around and punched the tree. The bark was rough and bloodied his hand, but he was hurting in other places far worse. He punched it again and again until his hands were numb with pain. The frustration he felt was enough to drive him insane.
Sienne nodded at Lewis before he left. She waited for him to come back and thought of what could possibly break him like that. She knew no one could be strong all the time, but she knew Lewis was one of the strongest people she knew.
Lewis slumped to the ground behind the tree and just sat there, tucking his injured hands close to his body. He was sobbing. He hadn't cried in a long time- not since he'd been claimed three years before, and before then, not since he got the news that Raven had been killed.
Sienne sat and waited. She started to think maybe she had upset Lewis or made him mad or something. She hoped he'd come back soon and tell her what was wrong, but she wouldn't push him.
Lewis then felt like he couldn't go back to Sienne. He couldn't face her and let her see that he'd hurt himself in a rage, but he couldn't just leave her, either. Still crying, he pressed his head between his knees, and in the fetal position, he let himself just tear apart. He was in such deep emotional pain that he didn't know what to do besides physically try to let it go through painful, racking sobs. He had never felt this intensely before, and it was scaring him.
Sienne sat and was starting to feel worried. She wanted to check on him, but didn't want to invade his privacy. She stayed there and decided he'd come back when he was ready.
(Anyway, I haven't been on in a while, so much has happened. What's going on?)
\ sorry who were you again? XD \
Lewis had cried for a while, and his eyes finally started to dry up, and his breathing began to even out, but his hands were still bleeding. He shoved them in his jacket pockets, collected himself, and stood up. He started to walk back, feeling incredibly empty inside.
Sienne saw Lewis walking back and smiled, "Are you feeling better now?" she signed.
Out of the Zeus cabin window, Viva could see Sienne and Lewis. She hoped they were ok. Viva waved out the window as she waited for Perth to answer her. No rush though, Perth was probably still gathering her thoughts.
Viva continued to move towards Perth. She didn't want to quiz the poor thing out, but what if her memory loss was related to their quest somehow! "Perth… do you have any memories?"
"Memories?" Perth asked, trying to think of any memories she could still remember. "No memories. But I can remember… facts. Like things you learn at school. Facts. I don't know why."
Viva continued to move towards Perth. She didn't want to quiz the poor thing out, but what if her memory loss was related to their quest somehow! "Perth… do you have any memories?"
"Memories?" Perth asked, trying to think of any memories she could still remember. "No memories. But I can remember… facts. Like things you learn at school. Facts. I don't know why."
Viva felt guilty for continuing to pry, but she asked, "so you remember stuff about the Gods and that, but you don't remember us?" She gestured toward herself and Ari.
"Um… no. Facts as in facts about math. And I can remember stuff about history."
Lewis nodded solemnly. Of course he was lying. He didn't remove his hands from his pockets, and he was pretty sure there was some evidence of the tears he had shed.
"Um… no. Facts as in facts about math. And I can remember stuff about history."
Viva winced. "Sorry." she said, but continued to ask anyway, "Perth, do you still believe in the gods though?"
Viva was trying to ascertain whether someone on their side, or someone not on their side had taken Perth's memory.
Sienne frowned, "Are you sure, Lewis?" Sienne asked. She quickly added, "Of course, if you don't want to talk about it, I won't force you."
Lewis was about to sign something back, but then he realized he had just accidentally shown Sienne his ruined hands. He stood there, mortified.
"Um… no. Facts as in facts about math. And I can remember stuff about history."
Viva winced. "Sorry." she said, but continued to ask anyway, "Perth, do you still believe in the gods though?"
Viva was trying to ascertain whether someone on their side, or someone not on their side had taken Perth's memory.
"Believe in gods? Well, maybe. I mean, Ari can do the water shpere thingy."
Sienne clasped her hands over her mouth. She started for his hands but pulled back, thinking she'd probably only make them hurt more. She looked up at him with worried eyes, "What happened? Do you want me to get you something to wrap them in? I can grab something if you'd like," her hands frantically flew in the air.
He was about to sign back, but his hands stung, and he winced in pain. He didn't want to tell her that he had been the one to hurt himself. Lewis nodded. He feebly asked,"Could you get me some bandages, please?" He made sure that the words were mouthed really clearly.
Sienne nodded, "I'll get nectar too," she signed before she ran off to find some bandages and nectar for Lewis. She first headed to the Apollo Cabin and knocked on the door. A girl she knew answered. She pointed at a pen in the girl's pocket and she handed it to her. She scribbled on her hand, Do you have bandages and nectar I can have? The girl nodded and left for a bit before returning with the supplies she needed. She ran back to the place she and Lewis had been meeting and set the supplies on the bench and signed, "Give me your hands."
Lewis turned his hands over so that the backs were facing upwards. He saw the nectar and felt guilty. Surely someone else needed it more than he did, and surely that someone else hadn't done something so stupid.
Sienne took the nectar and poured just a little onto Lewis's hands. After doing that, she set it back down and grabbed the bandages. She wrapped them around his hands and set the excess next to the extra nectar, "Is it better?" she asked.
Ari sat down on the ground and sighed deeply. Her head was abuzz with trying to sort out information and trying to organize thoughts. She traced something on the floor of the cabin with her finger silently, trying to get the word out of her head. Hopeless. Hopeless. Hopeless. Hopeless. Hop……..
The nectar burned a little, but he knew it would speed up the healing. He nodded in agreement, debating on whether or not to tell her.
Sienne nodded, "Ok, if anything is bothering you, you can tell me, unless, of course, you don't want to. But if you need anything, I'll help you as best as I can."
.jpg)
