"Don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about. So what if I want you to be my pillow? You got a problem with that shorty?" He huffed. "Since you're such a big cat, you're all fluffy and cuddly. This is going to be great." He grinned. He looked at all the steps when they exited the building and sighed heavily. While glaring at it, he saw a flash of something. He was wearing his uniform, and Jas pulled his tie, whispering that he seems him later. That made him shiver, and his ears grew red. "Jas…have we ever been here together at one point in our lives? I don't know, and I just got some freaky flash of you whispering his my ear. I couldn't tell if it was a memory or a fantasy." He covered his ear. Why did that have to come out now? His whole body felt hot just thinking about Jas whispering to him.
Jas rolled his eyes, though he’d be lying if he said he didn’t absolutely love the idea of cuddling up with Connor again, even if it was in his cat form for now. “you love me, don't deny it." Jas teased as they started back down the rediculous amount of stairs the institute had. He glanced up at Connor and tilted his head, brows knitting together when he recognized what Connor was saying. "Y-yeah, we did actually. In the last life. We got together after I was let out of here. I let you arrest me, I stayed for a few weeks before Suni convinced your higher ups to let me go. In that time we sort of stopped being enemies and got close. We went to your place after everything was settled." Jas explained carefully, making sure to leave out the fact that they had been closer then friends in the time they had spent together in the institute, already seeing how uncomfortable the smallest memory of them lovingly teasing each other made Connor now. "It seems like a fantasy." Jas agreed whistfully. "But It was defiantely real." He offered a small smile and gently tapped Connor's hand. "If it's any consolation I wouldnt be able to whisper in your ear now unless you bent down to my height do I don't think you have to worry about that anymore."
"I didn't mean it like that. I'm not worried about you doing anything to me because, in all honesty, it feels natural to do things like that with you. Not saying you should, but you know what I mean." He started to walk down the stairs pulling Jas next to him gently. "The memory got me flustered because my ear is very sensitive, always has been, and always will be. So feeling your breath on my ear was a bit of a surprise, even if it was just a memory." Connor laughed and shook his head. "Even though you are shorter than me, you still have the skills to get me all flustered, and you know it. Don't act like you find a way. That's not that Jas I know and love." He grinned as they reached the end of the steps. "Now, let's go home and rest before we get on that plane."
"I wouldn't dream of doing anything as scandalous as whispering in your very sensitive ears." Jas said sarcastically, laughing softly and gently squeezing Connor's hand "in all seriousness, I wouldn't do anything to you, affectionately or otherwise without knowing you were okay with it beforehand." He smiled softly as they finally reached the end, half tempted to teleport back home instead of walking. "Oh? So you do love me?" Jas cooed with a snicker. "Took you long enough to admit it." Jas sighed softly and nodded in agreement. "A nice long nap without needing to worry about anything sounds great right about now. I'm sure we'll rest plenty on the plane and once we get back to Italy."
He rolled his eyes. "Okay, mister. Don't get cocky now." He hopped on Jas's back and pointed towards the house. "Alright, my transportation, it's time to go home." He chuckled. "Don't act like I'm too heavy for you. I know what your strengths and weaknesses are. Do you want to teleport home or run home?" He grinned. "I'm not getting down either way. Whatever you feel is best." Connor didn't know how he felt about Jas. There were so many mixed emotions, but he knew one thing for sure. Whether it was in a friend way or something more, he loved Jas with all his heart. Way more than he ever loved anyone else.
"I'm not! I'm merely stating what is true, heart." Jas defended, laughing in surprise when Connor jumped on his back. He adjusted his hold on Connor so that his legs wrapped around his waist. "I'm a cat darling not a horse." Jas reminded with a laugh as he started their walk home. "Considering you did just jump on my back I would think just popping back home the easy way would he a waste of energy on your part." He said, glancing over at Connor over his shoulder, breath hitching slightly as he realized just how close they were. He looked forwards quickly before he could make the situation more akwards and started down the sidewalk. "I suppose this is payback for all the times I've used you as my own mode of transportation in our past life." Jas reasoned, suddenly hyperaware of every point where he and Connor came into contact. "You're light as feather dear." Jas reassured with a laugh
Connor rolled his eyes and looked ahead to where Jas was walking. "That's the correct answer. I would've knocked you over the head if you said anything else. I am light as a feather." He hummed, looking at Jas when he wasn't looking. Instead of looking away, he stared for a moment. Maybe that moment was longer. Connor looked over his features and swallowed hard at his neck and lips. Connor's mouth opened slightly, trying to think of something else, but how could he? Connor was sure Jas could feel his heart rise and his chest steadily rising and falling faster than usual. He wondered if Jas was the one with his legs wrapped around Connor. He thought about what jas's facial expression would look like if he were pressed against a wall and if their lips touched…"Fuck." he groaned.
"something wrong, dear?" Jas asked, concern laced in his voice. He ignored the glances he got as they walked through town back to his apartment. "Please don't tell me you forgot something at the institute. I'm not going back up all those stairs, especially if you're on my back. If it's something for the trip we can buy it when we get to Italy. If it's something we need now I wouldn't mind going to a nearby store." Jas said, trying to think of anything that they might have forgotten for the kids or the trip, or something that could have gone wrong that day. He couldn't think of anything other than their interaction with Jake but Jas had assumed Connor had been fine after that. The more he thought about it, paired with the feeling of Connor's quickening heartbeat and breath, the more has grew anxious.
(OMG, SORRYYYY, I forgot about this because I forgot to mark it as unread!!!)
Connor looked up and shook his head, his slight blush increasing to a more visual one. "No! No! I wasn't-I mean, I didn't forget anything, I swear. I was thinking." He dug his head into Jas's shoulder. "It was nothing important, I swear." He tried to calm his heartbeat down, but it wasn't working. Why did thoughts like those have to come into his head right now? He wasn't even thinking about them until recently and…."Shit." I'm fucking in love with Jas! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!! He was internally screaming. Not at Jas but himself. How could he fall in love with someone else while still in a relationship? I mean, he just got divorced like 5 minutes ago. The papers haven't even gone through, so he still shares his last name with Nick. "I'm sorry, I'm trying to figure out some stuff in my head right now."
(it's all good!I've done that way too many times 😂)
"hm, if you're sure." He replied skeptically, gently nudging Connor's head with his own when he felt the other bury into his shoulder. He carefully lifted a hand and gently brushed through Connor's hair. Has relaxed only slightly as they reached the apartment building, glad to be somewhere safe. "It's alright, love. You don't need to apologies for working through your thoughts. It's been a very long day, it's understandable if you need some time to process all of it." He replied, slowly setting Connor down so that he could dig out his keys from his pockets. Upon opening the door, he was immediately met by Suni. Jas glanced around fir the kids before finding them in the living room. He crouched down, letting Suni jump up onto his shoulders before heading into the kitchen to set down the goodies they had bought from the bakery.
Connor had slid off his back making sure he didn't bump into Suni. He was going to help the kids, but a question stuck in his mind like gum under a desk. He leaned against the counter looking up at Jas while he watched Jas unpack the bag full of food. "Why are you so nice to me?" He stood up straight and looked down at Jas now. "I just don't understand it. I've been a dick to you for years. Not to mention in this life and since I don't remember all these memories you're saying I have, I don't know what to believe. Not to mention I'm a wreck! I don't get why you're so nice to me and you care for me and my children, I just…" He sighed putting his hands on the counter to study the marble that felt all too familiar.
Suni gave Jas an affectionate nudge before hopping off Jas’s shoulders and landing back down on the floor, trotting off with the bag of biscuits to share with the kids. “Not so many, Suni. We have to get on the plane soon and I don’t want the kids getting sick.” Has called to his brother, only being met with a string of yips and snickers. Jas moved around Connor, putting away the few things they had bought as well as making a list of anything they’d need to get for when they reached Italy. Jas paused and glanced up from his little task. In all honesty, making the list was pointless , he just wanted something to distract himself until they were ready to leave. It had seemed like a better option than sitting with his thoughts. He slowly set don his phone and tipped his head thoughtfully, staring at an imperfect tile in his kitchen floor. “Would it be cheesy if I said it was because I love you? I don’t need a reason other than that to be nice to you Connor.” He heaved a sigh and perched on the countertop. "You've always been there in every life. I know that might have been annoying for you but for me it felt nice knowing I'd always have a friend or at least someone who I could relate to that didn't leave after a lifetime. Even if you didn't notice I was there and even if I kept my distance, I was always watching you grow and become the man I love so much. I wanted to do the same, to become someone you could rely on and feel comfortable enough to share our infinite lives with. Last life was the start of that. It was the first time I could be myself around you, where I could could truly love you and be loved by the most important person in my lives. I“ He paused for a moment, searching for the right words without sounding desperate or worse, creepy. “I never will stop loving you, Connor. You or those beautiful kids. You're free to do what you wish with what I say, stay for as long as you want or leave whenever you like but know I'll never not care and love for you." The moment the last words left his lips, Jas felt a weight loft off his chest. He glanced up to watch Connor bit refused to take back what he had been holding onto this entire life.
Connor stared at Jas for what felt like hours. He didn't back away or look disgusted. He never thought someone could love him this much. He didn't know that Jas had been feeling this way since forever. And he thought he was in love. He shook his head, snapping his gaze away from Jas. His cheeks felt hot, and he knew why. "I…" He breathed and then placed his hands on Jas's sides. "Fuck Jas…" Connor pulled his face close, so their lips practically touched. "Jas…whenever I'm around, I think about the weirdest things. Whether it's going on a date with you or wanting to hold your hand, I shouldn't think about those things because I told myself for years I don't love you, but after the events that have happened recently, all I can think about is you and how I want to care for and protect you. Also, how badly I want to kiss you. I've been thinking about kissing you for the longest time. So, I guess my question is, I don't know what I feel, but telling me how you feel only makes me love you more, so if I could, can I kiss you?" Connor stared at Jas with soft eyes.
Jas' heart lept into his throat as Connor closed the space between them. His eyes fluttered when Connor nearly kissed him, hypnotized by his closeness, the familiar feeling of having Connor so close to him, at hearing his name whispered on Connor's lips. "Connor I-" he took in a shaky breath, tipping his head to softly press a kiss to Connor's brow, giving himself time to think for a moment. Was this ok? After so much that had happened between them, that happened today alone, was he allowed to love Connor again. He missed Connor, desperately so. "I told you once before love, no matter what may be happening between us, I will always accept any amount of love from you." Jas cupped Connor's cheek, gently stroking his cheek with one hand while the other traced over his lips. He pressed a kiss to Connor's nose, to his cheek, again to his brow before finally meeting his hazy gaze with a matching soft one of his own. "But Are you sure you don't want to wait? You just got divorced not an hour ago. And what about the kids?" He asked, as much as it pained him to suggest waiting he knew if the time ever came to slowly start rebuilding their relationship, he wanted everything to be right.
Connor frowned. He knew Jas was right, but the longer he waited, the longer he would feel the pain of not being able to call Jas his. "I know, the kids don't have to know for now, and we can still take things slow. I just…I've been staring at your lips for practically two days straight." He stared at the counter for a second before his eyes jumped back to Jas's. He was trying to push the feeling away, but being so close to Jas and having his finger run over his lips was not helping. Connor's eyes fluttered shut, giving into the warm feeling of his hand. "Jas, if you keep touching me like this, the idea of waiting will no longer be in my mind." He warned.
Jas arched an eyebrow, "you think you're going to be able to keep anything from your kids? Especially with one being a mind reader?" Jas laughed softly as he studied Connor, watching his reactions. It intrigued him, how such small gestures could make Connor melt. "Two days straight, oh you poor baby. How have you survived that long?" Jas teases sarcastically, continuing to run his thumb over Connor's lips while his free hand now came to rest at his waist, pulling him in closer. He dropped his voice as he hovered over Connor's lips, a hairs width away from kissing him. "Call this a little bit of payback, my Heart, for the countless lives I spent waiting for you. For the countless more I'd still wait to have you right here and call you mine once again." He murmured, finally giving in and removing his finger from Connor's lips in favor of wrapping his arm around him and pulling him as close as possible for the much needed kiss. Jas leaned in and gently brushed his lips over Connor's, shivering in delight at the found familiarity.
Connor felt a tightening in his chest. The pure joy from having his lips against Jas's was indescribable. "Fuck…" He mumbled against Jas's lips. He didn't pull away just yet, he wasn't kidding when he said he had been thinking about this for quite some time. He tilted his head to deepen the kiss and somehow found a way to pull Jas closer to him. Connor tried his best to keep his hands still on Jas's waist, but it was hard to do when he could feel the curves of his body moving. He mentally slapped himself and kept his hands still. His eyes would flutter open for just a second before closing back. He wasn't entirely sure this was real, but he was. He reluctantly pulled away to look at Jas so that he could catch his breath. "That was way better than I imagined it. We did this all the time in our last life?" Connor chewed on his bottom lip, that tightening in his chest giving him a good feeling called hope.
Jas hummed softly, gasping softly when he was pulled in by Connor, now halfway off the counter. He was still unused to their height difference but it made little difference. This was still Connor, the love of Jas' lives. Jas willed his hands to remain on Connor's waist, fighting the urge to bunch Connor's shirt in his hand, to find the scar on Connor's back or to remove the shirt completely. Jas followed Connor for a moment, pressing kisses to Connor's lips before he straightened and caught his breath, now back down on the ground. "you had doubts?" Jas asked with a teasing laugh, nodding his head "yeah, we did." Jas replied, hands dropping back to his side as they took a moment to breath, to organize their thoughts.
Connor gave a breathless, trying not to have his thoughts go any farther down the gutter. However, there was one question he had to ask. "Have we ever done anything more than just kiss and touch each other? I'm just wondering because it would be a shame if we did. Then I wouldn't be able to remember it. Just because we have a lead on where to find my memories doesn't mean I'll be able to get them back, you know?" Connor didn't want to let go of Jas yet; he still wanted to hold him close. He peeked down the hallway to see if his kids were still running around the apartment with the energy they had left. They happened to be sitting, playing with the action figures Jas had brought back. He leaned forward and snuck a kiss onto his lips.
Jas laughed softly and shook his head. "No, dear. We havn't, neither of us were quite ready for that yet in our last life. We didnt really get that far before your mission," he explained, a slight frown falling to his lips at the reminder of what had been Connor's last days. "I'd be more than happy to make new memories with you my love, but I really don't want to be the only one with our memories from our past life. They are far too precious to leave in the past." A muffled hum escaped him as Jas cupped Connor's cheek and kissed back, feeding into his love and proximity. He wrapped a secure arm around connor's waist before gently breaking away. "But If there is no true way of getting your memories back, I'd be more than happy to fill you in on what you've forgotten." He murmured, a hopeful smile on his features. "We'll have time for this later once we settle down." He promised, pressing one last kiss to Connor's lips before gently nudging him back and guiding him to the living room where suni was watching the kids play from his spot on the couch.
(Sorry for missing these for a while I've been pent up with work)
"Right, right yeah…" He scoffed. Connor chewed on his lip as he watched Jas walk away. "I'll um…I'll get the kids packed and ready. When are we leaving?" He looked down the hallway making eye contact with the kids. He kneeled and held out his arms, signaling for them to climb up into his arms and get ready for the flight. Sure, he could pack whatever the children need but what they want is up to them. He watched them climb into his arms and held them close. Charlotte was already almost asleep but had the energy to get her through the day after a short nap.
(it's all good! Take your time!)
"An hour or so," Jas called as he and Suni, now back in his human form started gathering Jas belonging. "We'll be a bit early but i'd rather accound for the traffic and such than hope the lines are short." He explained as he came back out of his bedroom with his suitcase already packed and a dufflebag of clothes to wash when he got home. He smiled softly and gently patted Charlotte's head. "You'll be able to sleep all you want on the plane, princess." Jas cooed softly, "believe me I know I will." He sighed softly before glancing up at Connor, "ready to go?"
(Thx)
Connor had the kids all dressed in light jackets since it would be cold on the plane. Connor and Jake planned to go on vacation that summer, so he still had the suitcases for them. Everything was back and ready to go. He looked up at Jas and grinned. "Yeah, yeah, I'm all ready to go. These two are as well." Charlotte had jogged over to Jas, pulling on his pants. "Charlotte doesn't tug like that if you want to be picked up. I can always do it, you know." He held out his hand, which Asher took instead and used to climb onto his arms. "Ash… okay, but I'm not going to be able to carry all these bags by myself…" Asher crawled onto his shoulders, giving Connor a free hand he needed. "That's one way to solve that. Charlotte, honey, how about you let me carry you?" She shook her head, "no, I want Jas to carry me!" Connor sighed. "I want Jas to carry me too, but you know we all can't have what we want…" Charlotte only huffed and looked up at jas. Connor mouthed an apology.
Jas gently nudged his two cats into a carrier before turning in a small circle, making sure everything was packed and ready before taking breath and standing sti. He glanced down at Charlotte and chuckled softly as gently scooped the girl up into his arms, nodding in thanks as Suni started carrying the suitcase and bags to the awaiting cab Jas had scheduled to take them to the airport. "You may not be able to get everything you want dear, but for our prince and princess, I will do anything and everything in my power to please them." Jas carefully scooped up the last if his remaining bags into his free arm. "Besides dear, I carried you back here. If you really want, I'll carry you around Italy after we settle back home." He winked before brushing past and grabbing his keys from the table as well as his wallet before stepping out into the hall, waiting for Connor before he locked the door.
Connor rolled his eyes, moved both of his children's bags, and kept a duffle bag of his things over his arm. "Hey, Jas? I know I might've said this a lot already but thank you. Many things have happened recently, and you being here with m-the kids helped a lot. I seriously can't thank you enough. I don't think I could've done this alone." Connor kissed him on the cheek before walking a little ahead of him. "Alright, we have such memories to get back, so why don't we go and take back what's mine, huh?" He made it out of the apartment and started to load things into the car.
Jas glanced up from locking the door to his apartment, and tipped his head thoughtfully. "When have I ever left your side, dear? Even if you couldn't see me I was there. We've lived our lives beside each other, that won't stop now. You will never be alone, sweetheart. No matter what. You or these kids." He promised, purring softly at the kiss before securing his gentle hold on Charlotte as they made their way to the awaiting car. He nodded, and put all of his bags into the trunk of the car. He passed Charlottle to Connor, promising he'd hold her when they got to the airport before embracing Suni in a tight hug. "We'll be watching from above, always. The kitsune promised, squeezing his brother before letting him climb into the passenger side of the cab and passing him the carrier with his cats. "Stay safe, all of you and call me when you get to Italy." Jas nodded and waved before the car started off towards the airport.
"Thank you?" Connor huffed in confusion. "Seriously who is that, he whispered to Jas." He sighed and rolled his eyes. He set Charlotte and Asher in the backseat of the car. They were old enough not to need car seats. They were quite calm during the car rides. They loved seeing the buildings pass by practically getting hypnotized by them. He sat in the passenger seat practically forcing Jas to drive. He was too mentally exhausted to even think about the road right now. He buckled himself in and leaned his fist off his temple. It felt wrong to Connor if he went and fell asleep so he didn't everything in his power to stay awake.
Jas chuckled softly "he's my best friend and brother, heart. He's also a kitsune so I wouldn't get on his bad side anytime soon." He warned, glancing over at the kids in the rearview mirror then at Connor. "Are you okay?" He asked softly, gently nudging Connor's hand. "Sleep, love. You're not doing the very important job of driving." He teased, his smile fading for a moment. "I really am sorry Connor. As much as I had hope for a life with you, I never wanted the life you created on your own to go this badly." His smile returned as he caught the kids looking around at the night scenery, a flicker of hope in his heart for something better. "Save for the kids of course. I don't anyone could regret having those beautiful creatures."
(Hey, sorry, I just had a national marching band competition, and these past few weekends, I've had back-to-back competitions, so sorry for not replying. It's just a lot has been going on. But after captain tryouts, everything should be back to normal!)
Connor shook his head. "No, no, I won't go to sleep. As I said, I'll sleep when you sleep. I think a late-night drive talk is just what I need. Some relaxation time." He looked at his children through the rearview mirror and smiled. "Yeah, they're the one thing that kept me going all these years. I could've never imagined more perfect children. Although they can be hard to handle, isn't that all children?" He chuckled and looked back to Jas. "Now, they're my responsibility, and I hope this whole situation doesn't make them feel like shit when they're older, that's all. He looked back between the seats to see them leaning against each other, sleeping peacefully. I love when so much, Jas, you don't even know." Connor folded his hands in his lap, his gaze shifting back to Jas.
(it's absolutely fine Bee! I hope the competition went well and I hope you've been enjoying yourself! All the luck in the world for the tryouts!👍🏼)
Jas sighed softly before nodding "as you wish, dear." he chuckled softly and rolled down the windows slightly to let the cool night air into the car. "I'd say that's all children. It's definitely how us three were when younger. Though me and Sash were menaces where suni was the angel." He though for a moment, before shaking his head. "As terrible as Jake was I think they'll put more importance on the memories they had with the dad that cared for them, that loved them unconditionally. Of course questions and pain will resurface over time but by then I think you'll find ways to explain things in your own way." Jas glanced over at Connor and gave a reassuring smile. "As much as I adore those kids, I know it's no where near it's as much as you do dear. As it should be considering you're their dad. But know you're not alone heart. No matter what happens, Ibas well as Suni and anyone else you need will be there." He promised, flicked his gaze back towards the road to refocus for a bit. He turned on the radio, finding a soft, calm song so as to not disturb the kids or the relaxing mood.
