forum The Strangers in the Palace (Closed)(Fantasy)

Started October 31, 2021 by Deleted user

tune

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Honey’s brow furrowed. Confused, he tugged on the bottom of the shirt. Slid his hand over the fabric on his knee. Pinched the long sleeves, then stared at Rin. He wasn’t entirely there. It was clear that a mix of alcohol, exhaustion, pain, and fear had left him drained. But he was still conscious enough to know that something was wrong.

People didn’t put clothes on Honey. They tore them off, threw them out, left them ripped on the ground. They ruined them on purpose or stepped on them accidentally. He’d thought for a moment before Rin had gotten the clothes that they were finally getting to that part. He’d even gotten ready for him, but they hadn’t even done so much as look his way.

Arquis returned with a basket of freshly baked bread, another thermos of tea, and ice water in a large pitcher. He poured a glass of water for Honey and scooped out some of the ice, which he wrapped in one of the towels from the bathroom. The makeshift ice pack was applied onto his wrist. Arquis made a smaller one for his eye. The swelling would need to go down, if Honey wanted to be able to see through it in the next few days.

“You shouldn’t be nice to me,” Honey repeated, on the verge of crying again, and Arquis simply shook his head.

“Of course we should. Now, please have some water. You will feel much better when you wake if you hydrate.”

Honey did as he was told. He drank the water, let Arquis ice and wrap his wrist, and then, without warning, fell asleep. It didn’t look like a very restful sleep, but at least he’d be less drunk when he woke.

Arquis went to Rin’s side and lovingly wrapped them in his arms. What they’d just witnessed was a lot to handle, but he knew it’d be harder for him. “How are you feeling, love?”

Rin was quiet, gently shifting the blankets to try and help Honey be more comfortable, fidgeting faintly with his sleeves as he watched Honey fall asleep. They took a deep breath, pressing into Arquis as soon as his arms wrapped around them. "I'm okay." they said softly. "It just…I…I didn't want to be right." their voice shook for just a moment, and they pressed closer to their partner, taking a deep breath. His heart hurt, and he held onto Arquis. "I really didn't want to be." he hadn't wanted to be right, he had wanted Honey to show up and laugh and say he had been experimenting with some sort of impactplay, something consensual, whatever, and that he appreciated the worry but it wasn't necessary, but not…not this. They had never wanted to be right.

It reminded him of himself, a lot, too. The way that they had been with Lysander. Internalizing all of it, believing they deserved it, believing that they didn't deserve kindness or help. And he hated it. They hated that Honey was going through that, hated that it reminded them.

Arquis sighed and hugged them a bit more tightly, trying to get the message through that he was not alone. “I know. I was hoping that we were incorrect as well. But it is good that he trusted us enough to come here. That he is warm and safe, at least for the time being.”

Honey stirred in the bed, but he thankfully did not wake. The bite mark on his neck was hidden by a bandage, but Arquis could still picture it with ease. It was not like the loving marks he’d left on Rin while cozying up to them in bed. Someone had bitten him hard enough to hurt, with enough force to break clean through the skin. And those scratch marks on his back were awful. All of it was awful. Somebody had taken advantage of Honey. Witty, charming, brave Honey, who risked his life when first visiting Rin and Arquis’s room.

Arquis untangled himself from his partner, lowered himself onto the bed and, as gently as he could, combed Honey’s hair into place. He placed a damp cloth over his forehead to hopefully cool him off; he’d started to sweat from the stress of it all. It made Arquis terribly angry that Honey was so afraid that he was even stressed in slumber.

Once he was done, he stood and guided Rin over to a spot on the floor. He took out the thermos of tea, split it in between to glasses, and showed them the basket of bread.

“I believe we should stay here until is awake once more, but that does not mean that we cannot take care of ourselves as well. You should eat, my dear,” he murmured, taking one of his hands and kissing it.

Rin nodded. "It's good he trusted us enough to come." they agreed softly, watching as Arquis put the cloth on Honey's forehead, and settled on the floor when Arquis led them over. He took a sip of tea, nodding again. "Right. Yes. I…we need to tell someone. But I…I don't want to tell anyone without his permission, but…" he didn't know what to do. They picked up one of the small pieces of bread, looking at it, then at Arquis.

Arquis shifted closer so that they were shoulder to shoulder. He wanted more than anything to convey that he was there for Rin and would help him through this situation. Reassuringly, he kissed their hand once more, following that with a gentle massage. He was still as good at it as he had been in the carriage that one day.

“We should talk to him first. It is likely that he will have details about whoever hurt him that could be used to find and ban them from the inn. I am not sure how that is done, whether Lovey or Divinity or someone else has to get involved, but we will find a way to do it.” He took his own polite sip of his tea. Honey should have been the one to drink it, but, well, Honey wasn’t awake enough to be drinking anything. “I do agree that Lovey should be informed at some point. He will have to be the one to tell her, though we can certainly encourage him.”

Rin leaned their head on Arquis's shoulder, taking another deep breath and closing their eyes for a moment. "Yeah. I mean…it's his choice about telling anyone, but…I really hope we can convince him to talk to at least Lovey. I can't…I don't want whoever did this to be able to stay." their voice was quiet.

“He needs to talk to someone,” Arquis agreed. He kept up the massage, eventually making his way to the other hand. “This cannot continue. He is already in a bad place, and if he had not managed to get away, then he could have been severely injured. I do not trust that he will be lucky enough to escape every time.”

The gears in his mind began to click. One did not function as a child of the de Vey family without learning quite sharp deductive skills. He remembered the comment Honey had made about not having money, then the rant that had poured out of him in self-hatred. Honey thought he had done something unforgivable. Was that related to money in any way? Could that explain why he was working at The Cecilia Rouge? Or was there something else at play? That was pretty likely, given that he didn’t know much about Honey.

“We should finish breakfast first, my dear, and then we can figure out what to do until and when he wakes. I would not be opposed to reading with you for a while.”

Rin took a deep breath, nodding a little bit. "Right. Of course." He replied softly, taking a bite of his bread. "You need to eat, darling. I haven't forgotten that." They said, voice still quiet, but firm. "At least some bread, Arquis. Please." He took another bite, shaking his her for a moment, then took another sip of tea.

“Yes. Right.” Arquis blew out a breath and picked up the bread like it was an unfamiliar object. He eyed it scrutinizingly, like it would grow smaller if he stared at it enough. “I am getting to it. In a moment. Just…”

He picked up his glass of tea and threw back the contents. It was a bit too sweet for his taste, which was unusual. Whoever had made it had apparently dumped in quite a bit of sugar. He wondered if they’d had a hard time seeing in the kitchen, as it had been rather dark in there, and had mixed up measuring spoons. He supposed he shouldn’t mind. It was much better than overly bitter tea.

Now for the bread. He tore off a little piece and put it in his mouth. Not bad. He swallowed it and mechanically took another piece. It felt like there was something in his throat, a great, uncomfortable lump sealing his airway shut. But of course, there was nothing. He ate the second piece. It didn’t go down as easy as the first.

He managed two thin slices of bread without any butter and then sat back. Surely that was enough. His mind filled with excuses as for why he couldn’t have more. Honey’s injuries had thrown off his appetite. The heating was messing with his mind. He didn’t particularly like the bread. They weren’t all lies, but they weren’t the whole truth, either.

Rin ate another piece of bread, with butter on it. "Darling…can you eat just a little more? You can put butter on it if you want." He said, voice soft as they took another sip of his tea. "Please. And then you won't have to eat until dinnertime if you don't want to." They glanced over at where Honey lay on the bed, then over at Arquis again, letting out a soft, quiet breath. This was hard for them. Seeing Honey so hurt and abused, knowing the mentality the young man had…it was hard. But they weren't going to give up on him.

Arquis saw the worried look on their face and resolved to try and help lessen his stress. Despite his body’s protests, he tore off another piece of the bread and stuck it in his mouth. Still no butter—he couldn’t manage it, he just couldn’t, his mind was saying such awful things—but he chewed and swallowed until that piece was gone. And then he gently pulled Rin over so that they were in his lap, gave him a soft hug, and kissed the top of their head.

“What can I do for you right now?” The question was uttered with patience and love. “Can I find you a distraction?”

Rin leaned back against them, taking a deep breath. "Thank you for eating another one, darling." They said softly. "I know it was hard for you. And, uhm, I don't know if there's anything you can do to distract me." He smiled faintly, closing their eyes for a moment. "Just hold me, I guess. It's just…this is hard. For me. It…brings back a lot of memories and…it…it's hard." They took a deep breath, turning to rest their cheek on Arquis's shoulder, nose brushing faintly against his neck. "Sorry."

Their apology broke his heart. He kissed him again and stroked their back. “You do not have to apologize, love. Not for that. Never for that.”

His other arm slipped around their waist, pulling them so close that he could feel his every breath. He tried to sync their breathing. His own was slow and steady and grounding.

“Remember what you told Honey? You deserve to be treated with kindness. What happened to you in the past was not your fault, and struggling with it today is not, either.” He gave them a light squeeze and a peck on the forehead. “I do not say it near enough, but I am so terribly proud of you, my dear.”

He took another deep breath, nodding very slightly. "Okay. Thank you, darling." his voice was still quiet, and they stayed curled close to Arquis, wanting this closeness with him, wanting to just be held close. He took a deep breath, then another, letting their breathing sync up with Arquis's, letting it help calm and ground them.

(I don’t wanna do a full time skip to the end of the day/next day but would you be alright with skipping a few hours to when Honey wakes up? I can do the mini skip if you’d like :) )

Arquis put the rest of the bread into the basket it had come in, then tidied up the butter and knife as well. He picked up one of the candles nearby and brought it closer so that they had a bit more light. Then, he dragged one of the suitcases over to where they were.

“We will likely have quite some time until Honey wakes. He seemed rather exhausted. Would you mind if I read to you in the meantime, my love? I can keep my voice down.”

He stroked that hand over their back again and pulled out a jacket to drape over the both of them. While he wasn’t sure if Rin would agree to his suggestion, he thought it might be best to offer him some kind of temporary diversion from their worry. He’d originally planned to read alone, but this seemed like a better option.

(yeah sure, go ahead!)

Rin pressed faintly into Arquis's hand, closing their eyes and nodding a little bit. "Yeah. That would be…that would be great." they replied softly, snuggling closer to Arquis and just listening quietly when the nobleman began to read. It was nice, to have this distraction for now. To be able to just relax and not think about Honey or Lysander or anything of the sort.

(alrighty!!)

Arquis read aloud for about an hour and a half, his voice just above a whisper. When he did finally stop, it was so he could get some water and give his partner a good, long embrace. He replaced the jacket with a blanket and continued reading. Whether or not the story was actually of interest to them, he wasn’t all that sure, but he hoped that it still acted as a sort of lullaby: enchanting, soothing, reliable. He’d specifically picked one of the few books he’d brought that wasn’t dark or challenging to read. This was a comfort story, a tale of bravery and adventure on the path to find a new home.

After another long bout of reading, he heard a noise that hadn’t come from him or his partner. He closed the book and tilted his head. He wasn’t sure where it’d come from until a familiar voice greeted him.

“Whatcha reading, dreamboat?”

“Honey?” Arquis carefully moved Rin out of his lap so he could stand. Sure enough, Honey was awake. He looked pale and tired, and Arquis went around blowing out a few of the candles to help him with his hangover. When he came to the bedside again, Honey was sitting all the way up.

He caught Arquis looking and gave him a slanting grin. It was clear, however, that he had a bad headache; his brow was pinched, his features taut with pain. “Hey there, handsome. Wanna tell me why I’m in your bed? Or should I just start making assumptions?”

Rin had half-dozed after a while, curled close to Arquis, but when Arquis moved him off his lap, he blinked his eyes open, standing and coming over to the bed. "Hey, Honey." they greeted softly. "Don't…what do you remember?" they hoped Honey hadn't gorgotten everything that had happened earlier; but then, maybe it would be better? Otherwise they knew Honey would be embarrassed about what he had said earlier.

“Remember?” Honey scratched his jaw and shrugged. “Not much. Must’ve had too much to drink. What’d you give me? Whiskey? Champagne?”

He went to stretch and froze. His eyes flickered over his wrapped wrist, and he lifted his other hand to prod the space around his black eye. Something dark came over his face, but it was quickly chased by remembrance. All of the air rushed out of him at once. It was like he’d taken a hard kick to the stomach. What little color had been left in his cheeks disappeared completely.

“Oh. Shit.” Honey swallowed and bit his lip. He looked, all of the sudden, very sad. He wasn’t crying, but this was somehow worse. “I’m sorry. I’m real sorry.”

"We didn't give you anything but water." Rin said quietly, reaching out to gently touch Honey's shoulder, trying to comfort him a little bit. "And it's…it's okay. We told you you could come to us, and we meant it." they glanced over at Arquis, then back at Honey, giving the young man the faintest of smiels.

Honey recoiled when he felt their hand and nearly slammed his head into a bedpost. His breathing was becoming increasingly shallow and ragged. He tore a hand through his hair so hard that Arquis thought he was gonna hurt himself. And then he grimaced because he’d used the wrong hand, and he slumped over, which only hurt his ribs.

“Honey, please,” Arquis begged. He didn’t want to touch him, not after his previous reaction, but he was terrified that Honey was going to wound himself further.

Honey rapidly shook his head. “You can’t- damnit, you can’t tell anyone. It’s not a big deal. Okay? You can’t. I’ll do anything you want. Anything.”

Rin immediately backed off, wincing at the realization that their automatic urge for physical comfort was just causing Honey more stress. "I'm sorry." they breathed, but at Honey's words, they shook their head. "No, we…I…it is a big deal. Honey, if it was consensual, then…then that's fine, it's…not ideal, but if there's consent then it's fine, but if there wasn't…Honey, you have to tell someone." his heart was breaking. "And you don't…we don't want anything, Honey. I promise. Not money, and not…not anything else, either." they could still remember Honey's words from earlier.

(pretty big warning on this one just in case)

“If I said I wanted it, then everything’s fine, yeah? Then I did. I wanted it.” Honey straightened up, his arm dangling at an odd angle. His lips twisted to the side. They quivered faintly. He looked away, and then, as if trying to convince himself, repeated, “I wanted it. I did.”

“Oh, Honey,” Arquis said sadly. He hadn’t been convinced that it was consensual before, but now he knew that it was not.

“I’m fine! I’m fine. I’m always fine. Nothing new. Just gotta pull myself together. Not the worst I’ve had. I’ll be fine. I will. It’s just a lot, y’know? Too much. Shit! Shit, it’s too much. Why is it too much? I’ve had it so much worse. Shit!”

He was starting to hyperventilate. Arquis, worried, did the first thing he could think of. He grabbed the blanket off the floor and held it out. Honey took it wordlessly, pushed his face into it, and let out a loud, hoarse sob. It was honestly more of a scream than a sob, the kind that ripped its way out of the throat. When it was finally over, he was still breathing heavily, but it seemed to have taken a lot out of him. His eyes were wet. He was shaking all over.

“I thought he was gonna kill me,” he whispered. “He was so mad. I thought I was gonna die.”

"That's not what I meant." Rin said helplessly at Honey's words about "wanting it". He hadn't meant it was all fine, just that if it was consensual then…then…then whatever, but…he shook his head very faintly, inhaling at Honey's scream. They felt helpless now, useless. He didn't know what to do, how to help. "I'm sorry." they said quietly. They wanted to reach out and comfort but from the way Honey had reacted before, they knew it wouldn't go over well. "Can…is there any…" they stammered for a moment. "Can I hug you? Or something? Would that…is that okay?"

Honey covered his face again and didn’t move. A minute passed, then two, then three. Arquis was about to check his pulse to make sure he hadn’t passed out when he finally lifted his head. There were tear streaks down his cheeks, and his expression was almost unbearable to look at. Raw. Hurt. Afraid, still so afraid, like any moment Arquis or Rin would change their mind and push him down.

“Please don’t touch me.” It stung how much he didn’t sound like himself. His words were fast and quiet, like he was afraid if he didn’t get them out quick enough then he’d be punished. And they were so, so shaky.

“We will not, Honey. Not if you do not want us to.” As if to prove the authenticity of what he’d said, Arquis took a step back.

Honey nodded and tucked his knees to his chin. He was clutching his blanket like it was a life preserver. His eyes weren’t quite looking at anything.

“I’m gonna tell you what happened. ‘Cause I really think you need to know. But please-” He broke off as another sob hit him. “Please don’t be mad at me. I tried so hard.”

"I won't." Rin promised, stepping back just a little bit, fidgeting their hands together for just a moment. "I'm sorry." at Honey's words, his shoulders slumped. "We would never be mad at you, Honey. I…I know you tried, and we would never be mad at you." he glanced over at Arquis, reaching out to take his hand. He just wanted something to hold onto, something to help ground them. They knew this was about Honey, about what had happened to him, but they needed something to ground themself while listening.

(major warning again it isn’t super graphic or violent but just in case anyone happens upon it—it’s really sad so just be cautious)

Arquis gave Rin’s hand a soft squeeze and sent them an equally soft look. If they needed to step out of the room at any point, he could talk to Honey alone. He didn’t want him to risk their own health, even if it was for something so important.

Honey saw their handholding. He made a noise like he’d been stabbed and sunk into himself even further. His face was so wet with tears at this point that it shone in the candlelight.

“I was bringing people food,” he gasped when he finally caught his breath, then squeezed his good eye shut. “And there was this guy. Before I got to your room, there was this guy, and he seemed really nice, right? He was so polite, but he- he asked about you. The married couple. He wanted to know if I could- if I would take a message. To you. And you’d said that- you’d said that you wanted to keep things private, and I didn’t know if he was- I didn’t think he was after you, but I didn’t know, y’know?”

Arquis had a very bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. He had a sudden suspicion that the man had been the one they’d run into in the hallway. The one who’d tried to flirt with Rin. Who’d been so odd and confident, so mildly threatening.

“So I told him no, that you guys were monogamous and weren’t taking suitors, but then he- he said that was fine. He seemed so nice. I really thought he was nice. He told me he’d like to see me again, and I- damnit, he seemed so polite and lonely, so I said I’d do it. And I went back, and he was really, really good for a while, right? We ate and he was so- I thought he was so respectful, so I said I’d stay a while longer, and he asked if I wanted something to drink, and I’d never say no to a drink, ‘cause it was free, right? And I had a drink and then another and then more and I lost count because he was so funny, and then he- he said he wanted to-”

Honey gagged again. Thankfully, he managed to keep it down, but it took him a moment to compose himself. Arquis whispered that he didn’t have to keep going, but he said that needed to.

“He was too drunk to- y’know how men get, when they’ve had too much, and I told him that it was alright. I was so tired, and I really, really just wanted to sleep, ‘cause I was so drunk. But he kept trying, and then he got mad and just- just lost it. And he was screaming- he wouldn’t stop screaming. I can’t remember a lot of it, but he said such- such bad shit, and I was crying cause he’d screwed up my back and my neck, and then he just- in the eye, and in the chest, and- and- and it was so bad. But I got away. I did, ‘cause he passed out eventually. And I came here, ‘cause you’d been so nice to me, but now I’ve ruined your day and I’m such a mess and I can’t even pay you back ‘cause he didn’t pay me shit.”

( D: it's making me very sad, poor Honey)

Rin swallowed faintly, coming to the same realization as Arquis. This was probably the same man and that made it worse, somehow. Worse, because they'd been flirting with Rin in such a weird way, and…and he had no doubt that probably they would have been on the receiving end of the abuse, if the man had succeeded in getting ahold of them, and they hated that this had happened at all. "I'm so sorry." they breathed, running a hand through their hair. "And you don't…Honey, we told you last night that you don't have to pay us back. At all. In any way, Honey. Not with coin, and not with your body, either." they let go of Arquis's hand to pour himself some water, taking a sip to help steady his nerves. "Do you want some water?" they asked Honey, setting their cup aside and taking a deep breath. "And…and like I said, it's not…it's not your fault, Honey. You thought he was nice. You thought he was a good guy and it isn't your fault that he tricked you. It isn't your fault that he…that he hurt you because he couldn't get it up."

(you know I was the one who wrote it and it also made me really sad, this part is gonna pass eventually but man is it rough)

Honey slammed his good hand down on his knee, aggressively shaking his head. “You don’t get it! I knew I shouldn’t have stayed later, but I did it anyways, and I knew I shouldn’t have started drinking, but I did it anyways, and I knew- I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. But I couldn’t keep my damn mouth shut, and that was- was why he-”

“Honey,” Arquis said quietly, “it is exactly as Rin said. He did not hurt you because you wanted to leave and get some sleep. He hurt you because he wanted to hurt you. It is entirely his fault.”

“But I- but-"

“He is a vile person that abused your trust and took advantage of you. You are a good person that was trying to protect us. You did not want what happened, and you did not deserve it, either.”

At all the praise, Honey started bawling. It was different than the silent, shaking crying he’d done earlier, different than the loud sob that had torn its way from his chest. He was hiccuping and wiping his nose on the sleeve of the shirt, which he tried to apologize for but couldn’t because he couldn't speak at all. He cried so hard that he nearly threw up again, and when the fit finally ended, he had broken blood vessels all around his non-swollen eye.

Honey didn’t look at either of them for a while. He didn’t say anything. He just wrapped himself up in the blanket and breathed.

“Well. That made my headache worse,” was what he finally said. It was clearly meant to be a joke, but Arquis didn’t laugh.

“Is there anything you need right now? Water, like Rin said? Or- or we could get you something to eat, I believe there is some bread left.”

“If… I changed my mind? About the hug?” He sniffed and laughed tearily. “You don’t gotta, I know I’m all- I’m all gross now, but it just- I think I need someone to just- just say that I did good. For once in my screwed up, sorry waste of a life, just say I did good. And hug me, and please, just don’t touch me anywhere else, I can’t. I can’t.”

(dude it's a sign of excellent writing, take it as a compliment, but goddamn you're making my heart hurt)

Rin almost started to cry when Honey did, taking a few deep breaths and having to look away so that he could get his own emotions under control, because he knew what this felt like. He knew what it felt like to be sobbing so hard because of what a terrible person had done to you, he knew how much it hurt when you had internalized so much only to be told it wasn't your fault to begin with. He took another steadying breath, looking over at Honey and nodding faintly. "Of course you can have a hug." they stepped closer, carefully wrapping their arms around Honey's shoulders. The hug was featherlight, and easy to break out of should Honey decide he no longer wanted it. "You did perfectly, Honey. You did the best you could do. You protected Arquis and I, and then you were abused by an angry, vile man who thought he could do whatever he wanted to you just because he was angry and you were there. You have done nothing wrong."