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forum Incorrect Quotes 2: Electric Boogaloo
Started by @evastardust groupRRAAAARRL
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Keres: Crushes are the worst.
Will: Yeah. Whenever I'm near someone I have a crush on, I start acting stupid.
Keres: You're always acting stupid.
Will: Yeah, don't think too hard about that one.
_
Will: I never make the same mistake twice.
Acyn: He makes it four or five times, just to be sure.
Will:
_
Dimitri: Raising a family is hard.
Kenna: Not if they're buried close enough to each other.
Dimitri: What?
Kenna: What?
_
Acyn: You often use humor to deflect serious trauma.
Will: Thank you.
Acyn: I didn't say that was a good thing.
Will: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny.
_
Verena: 9-1-1 what's your emergency.
Verena:
Verena: What do you mean your being murdered.
Verena:
Verena: That's illegal, people can't do that.
_
Will: Keres, I'm so happy I could kiss you!!!
Keres: Uh… thanks!
[later]
Keres, laying face down on Kenna's bed: I can't believe I thanked him, Kenna. Thanked him. He wanted to kiss me and I said, "thanks". Why? Because I'm a huge moron.
Kenna, patting Keres's back: Hey, don't beat yourself up over it. Things like that happen. Remeber when Nakoa said he loved me?
Keres: Didn't you say "neat"?
Kenna: I said neat.
_
Nadia: Kenna told me instead of being sad I should, "go get it girl". So I'm going to go get it, girl.
Asteria: Get what?
Nadia: Unclear. I'll just get everything to be safe.
_
Nakoa: Why are you so small?
Kenna: I am weighed down by all my sins.
_
Verena: Kenna is at that age when a girl has only one thing on her mind?
Caspian: Boys?
Verena: Overthrowing the monarchy.
_
Nakoa: Who hurt you?
Kenna, sarcastically: You want a list?
Nakoa: Yeah, actually. If you could also organize it from "closest to me" to "farthest away from me" that would save a lot of time.
_
Nakoa: We had a bonding moment!
Nakoa: I cradled you in my arms!
Kenna: Nope, don't remember it, didn't happen.
_
Goddess of death: Your time has come.
Nakoa: Hold on, let me ask Kenna real quick.
Goddess of death: That's not how this works-
Nakoa: She said no.
_
Verena: Do you want a couple extra minutes to review before the test?
Kenna: No, we die like men.
Tanith: Ugh, why is it always "like men".
Kenna: We die like men, unprepared and useless.
_
Acyn: I'm Will's emergency contact.
The healer: So… you're here to pick him up?
Acyn: I'm here to remove myself as Will's emergency contact.
_
Will: If you hurt Acyn, I'll kill you.
Caspian: If I hurt Acyn, I'll kill myself.
Will: Not if I kill you first.
Acyn: Pleasure to watch you two interact, as always.
_
[in the middle of the war, and the rebels are loosing]
Kenna: Don't worry guys, I have a plan!
Nakoa: … A good plan, where no one dies?
Kenna, about to sacrifice herself: Let's not make assumptions quite yet.
_
Will: You won't hit me! I've got a witness.
Eira: Turn around, Acyn.
Acyn: (turns around)
Will: …Acyn?
_
Dimitri, trying to cheer Eira up: Come on, Eira, Kenna can't be good at everything. Who knows, maybe she's a terrible kisser.
Eira: No, she's good at that to.
Dimitri: Well, there has to be someth…
Dimitri: Wait, what?
_
Keres: My soulmate needs to be graceful, sophisticated, and coordinated.
Will: Hey Ke- (crashes into a table, falls and drags everything off the table with him)
Keres:
Keres: I want that one.
_
Dimitri: Why would you give a sword to Ilaria?!
Verena: She felt unsafe!
Dimitri: Well now I feel unsafe!
Verena:
Dimitri:
Verena: Do you want a sword?
_
Caspian: Can we talk about the letters you sent to the Elite?
Kenna: It was just an update.
Caspian: It just says, "I'm back on my bullshit".
Kenna: People need to know.

@ElderGodSeeba petsbing bing 🐸

Im back baybee

Shohei: I can’t believe you! you’re not the man I married!
Kiyoshi: fine then! we’ll get a divorce, and I’m taking Suko!
Etsuko: [slowly sliding the monopoly board away from them] I think we should stop playing now-
——————————————–
Dakota: I didn’t understand why people care so much for their dumb friends.
Dakota: until I got a dumb friend myself.
Dakota: I’ve only known Benji for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
——————————————–
Etsuko: I told 'Sana that her ears turn red when she lies and now I can tell when she’s lying.
Tsuga: what? how?
Etsuko: I’ll show you.
Etsuko: 'Sana, do you love me?
Osana: [covering her ears with her hands] no.
——————————————–
Priest: repeat after me
Herbert: after me
Priest, whispering to Fraser: uh, are you sure you want to marry this one?
Fraser, crying: yes
——————————————–
Innocence: please, for me?
Feste: don’t do that.
Innocence: what?
Feste: you think every time you say “please, for me?” I’ll do whatever you want. not this time.
Innocence:
Innocence: please, for me?
Feste: okay.
——————————————–
Tsuga: ah yes, baguettes, the snakes of bread. we’ll take two of your freshest yeasty eels, good sir.
Baker: what??
Kiyoshi: ignore him.
——————————————–
Faith: so I found a foolproof method of determining if someone is truly evil.
Generosity: and that is?
Faith: if they dislike Empathy, they’re evil.
Generosity: yeah okay, that’s pretty solid logic.
——————————————–
Brook: [reading baby formula] “shake well before feeding”
Brook: um, okay
Brook: [picks up baby]
Robin: NO WAIT-
——————————————–
Noel: I called??
Malcolm: and I watched it ring.
——————————————–
Humour: butter is just food lotion-
Loyalty: I'm going to stop you right there.
——————————————–
Leopold: [hands phone to Collyn] it's your boyfriend.
Collyn: Willbur is NOT my boyfriend
Collyn: [picks up phone] Hey baby💕
——————————————–
Malcolm: Noel, come on. you have to get up.
Noel: I’m not sleeping, I’m dead.
Noel: leave flowers and get out.
——————————————–
Empathy at a fake plant: I can't wait till it starts growing fruit :D
Feste: im gonna tell him-
Loyalty: don't u dare
——————————————–
Gorden: what are you reading?
Fraser: a book of the things I love
Jude: that’s just a photo album of Leopold
Fraser: and?
Gorden and Jude:
Gorden and Jude: [sit next to him to read]
——————————————–
Shohei: I love you
Kiyoshi: I love you more
Shohei: well I love you m-
Kiyoshi: don’t play this game you're not going to win

@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

Dragon: Tori is at that age when a girl has only one thing on her mind.
Sabo: Boys?
Dragon: Overthrowing the World Government.

Peregrine: My soulmate needs to be graceful, sophisticated, and coordinated.
Estella: Hey Pe- (crashes into a table, falls and drags everything off the table with her)
Peregrine:
Peregrine: I want that one.

@croccin-champagne

rupert, with a sigh, to lorelei's guidance counselor, who is concerned about her recent hobbies and seemingly lack of dealing with her mother's death, a year later: lorelei's at that special age where she has only one thing on her mind
counselor: boys? popularity?
rupert: no, crime.

@knightinadream group

Fen: If I'm sad, I eat. If I'm angry, I eat. If I'm happy, I eat.
Ezra: What if you're tired?
Fen: When I'm tired, I take it to bed and eat.

Maeng: My life is a DISASTER!
Matthew: Shut up and replace the batteries in your controller.

Astra: Okay, so get this.
Astra: You make ten meals and you're not a cook.
Astra: You make twenty paintings and you're not an artist.
Astra: But you kill one person-
Kimmie: Astra, it's 3 am. PLEASE GO TO SLEEP!

Pearl: You wanna hear something dirty?
Chae: Yeah.
Pearl: The kitchen.
Chae:
Pearl: Go clean the kitchen.

Carmen: Well, I guess you could say that "I've fallen for you"
Lyz: You just fell down seven flights of stairs, how are you even alive-

PJ: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Maestro: Let's not forget who PUSHED ME IN!
PJ: Anyways, as I was saying.

@evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

Casey: My life is a DISASTER!
Beck: Shut up and replace the batteries in your controller.

Lyra: Okay, so get this.
Lyra: You make ten meals and you're not a cook.
Lyra: You make twenty paintings and you're not an artist.
Lyra: But you kill one person-
Ness: Lyra, it's 3 am. PLEASE GO TO SLEEP!

Alessandra: You want to hear something dirty?
Percy: Yeah.
Alessandra: The kitchen.
Percy:
Alessandra: Go clean the kitchen.

Oscar: Well, I guess you could say that "I've fallen for you"
Nathaniel, looking at the angles his wrist and fingers are at:

Alexei: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Nich: Let's not forget who PUSHED ME IN!
Alexei: Anyways, as I was saying.

@Reblod flag

Thana edition~


Thana, giving a balloon to Mara: I have no soul, have a nice day!
Mara, accepting the balloon: I don’t have one either…

Eryx: You know that can kill you right?
Thana, downing six espresso shots in one go: Uh, yeah.
Jorvon, smoking a cigarette: That's the point.
Kado, drinking bourbon straight from the bottle: We're trying to speed this up.
Moukib, eating raw cookie dough: nodding

Thana: Hold on, let me overthink it.

Bronte: Okay for security purposes I'm going to pretend to be a robber.
Bronte: Give me all your money if you want to live.
Kado: Bold of you to assume I have money.
Thana: Bold of you to assume I want to live.
Moukib: Bold of you to assume you could kill me.

Thana: walking by
Eryx: glance
Jorvon: glance
Bronte: glance
Thana: walks faster
Thana: DON'T LOOK AT ME I'M NOT IMPORTANT.

Thana: How the fuck do people just stay motivated their entire lives? What drives you? I got out of bed once and I've been exhausted ever since.
Kado: You need to learn to hate life to the point where you want to get revenge on existence itself

Thana: I hate to say I told you so.

Thana: Wait, no. That felt pretty good.

Thana, to Lux: Aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you just want to go apeshit?

Thana: You wanna see how hardcore I am?

Thana: Punches a wall

Thana: Take me to the hospital

Thana: Perhaps you could talk to the healer and she could give you something to ease your…
Moukib: I am not mad, Thana. I've just been in a very bad mood for eternity.

Thana: Hoo boy, I am not having a good time right now.

Thana: You think kindness doesn’t exist, you pathetic nihilist? How about you go look into the big beautiful eyes of a cow? What do you think now asshole?

Thana: I could kill you if I wanted to

Jorvon: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a really dedicated duck. You're not special

Thana: I'm not lying on the floor physically but I am lying on the floor spiritually.

@Starfast group

Andor: The fire alarm in my building keeps going off
Andor: So I did what anyone would do, and made the bed and swiffered the floors in case a truckload of hot dudes end up going apartment to apartment.

Ara: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.
Andor, taking his order: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

Andor: I never make the same mistake twice
Ara: he makes it four or five times, just to be sure

Adelia: There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.
Gerard: It's usually an oncoming train.
Adelia: Could you just try not to kill my vibe for five fucking seconds.

Frank: Be the bigger person.
Crispin: No? I'm 5'2 and bitter. You be the bigger person.

Holly: I was a young beautiful girl filled with rage back then!
Holly: Wait, I’m still filled with rage! And still pretty hot.
Holly: Get me a gun!

Dallas: Hoo boy, I am not having a good time right now.

Taven: You wanna see how hardcore I am?

Taven: *Punches a wall
*
Taven: Take me to the healer.

Crispin, to Caleb: Aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you just want to go apeshit?

Ara: Okay for security purposes I'm going to pretend to be a robber.
Ara: Give me all your money if you want to live.
Andor: Bold of you to assume I have money.
Dallas: Bold of you to assume I want to live.
Holly: Bold of you to assume you could kill me.

Gerard: Hold on, let me overthink it.

Milo: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Garzlan: Let's not forget who PUSHED ME IN!
Milo: Anyways, as I was saying.

@evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

Jackson: The fire alarm in my building keeps going off.
Jackson: So I did what anyone would do, and made the bed and swiffered the floors in case a truckload of hot dudes end up going apartment to apartment.

Victor: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.
Geneva, taking his order: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

Harper: There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.
Beck: It's usually an oncoming train.
Harper: Could you just try not to kill my vibe for five fucking seconds.

Kate: I was a young beautiful girl filled with rage back then!
Kate: Wait, I’m still filled with rage! And still pretty hot.
Kate: Get me a gun!

Victor: Hold on, let me overthink it.

Lord Arnol: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Percy: Let's not forget who PUSHED ME IN!
Lord Arnol: Anyways, as I was saying.

@Althalosian-is-the-father book

Silas: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.
Octavia, taking his order: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

Octavia: I was a young beautiful girl filled with rage back then!
Octavia: Wait, I’m still filled with rage.

Nathaniel: Hold on, let me overthink it.

Silas: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Daniella: Let's not forget who PUSHED ME IN!
Silas: Anyways, as I was saying.

@knightinadream group

Maestro: It's dark in here.
Noir:
Maestro: I'm not scared of anything. I'm a tough guy.
Noir:
Noir: Do you want me to hold your hand?
Maestro: Oh, thank you! I thought I was gonna have to ask.

Hyungwon: It's bedtime guys.
Minwoo: Please don't say it-
Chansung: YEET YEET IT'S TIME FOR SLEEP!
Minwoo: There will be a day where I YEET YEET you out of a window and you'll land on the CoNcReTe.
Chansung:
Hyungwon:
Minwoo: Okay, so goodnight.

Ezra: I can't believe people don't eat the crust. It's part of the food, it's fantastic even if it doesn't taste the same as the rest of the watermelon.
Phillip: I know, ri-
Phillip: WAIT, WHAT?

Khyung: Who are you talking to?
Kimmie: I'm on the phone with Pizza Hut.
Khyung: Who the hell is Pizza Hut and why are you talking to her?? Is she pretty?

Ash: You know what's really odd?
Knight: What?
Ash: Numbers not divisible by 2.
Knight: That joke was as bad as your fried eggs.

Adrian: Always be positive!
Adrian: [falls down the stairs]
Adrian: Wow I got down those stairs really fast!

@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

Azami: I can't believe people don't eat the crust. It's part of the food, it's fantastic even if it doesn't taste the same as the rest of the watermelon.
Sanji: I know, ri-
Sanji: WAIT, WHAT?
(they may be best friends but that doesn't mean Azami can't confuse the everloving shit out of Sanji every so often)

@knightinadream group

Jack: I never knew why people cared so much for their dumb friends until I got one myself.
Jack, picking Adrian up: If anything ever happened to Adrian, I'd kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Basil: Haeil, my tooth hurts.
Haeil: Oh, come here my little one, let me put an ice pack over it.
Seokju: Haeil, my tooth hurts.
Haeil: Then suffer you little shit.

Matthew: [comes out of the shower]
Ghost: [writes "YOUR GOING TO DIE" on the mirror]
Matthew: [corrects it to "YOU'RE" and leaves]

Kimin: Jaesung, give me patience.
Sebastian: Shouldn't it be "Jaesung, give me strength"?
Kimin: If Jaesung gave me strength, everyone would be dead.

@sock group

Chan, drunk: When I was 12 I peed on my dog.
Elyas, staring at him with a horrified expression:
Chan: Right in his little dog face
Ren, dragging him by the sleeve: Okay, we're going home

@Consider-PB_and_the_Jellies

Vicky: I never knew why people cared so much for their dumb Mortals until I got one myself.
Vicky, picking Jessi up: If anything ever happened to Jessi, I'd kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Clover: Melaine, my tooth hurts.
Melaine: Oh, come here my little one, let me put an ice pack over it.
Selena: Melaine, my tooth hurts.
Melaine: Then suffer you little shit.

Ramona: [comes out of the shower]
Melaine, a ghost: [writes "YOUR GOING TO DIE" on the mirror]
Ramona: [corrects it to "YOU'RE" and leaves]

@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

Azami: I never knew why people cared so much for their ship's doctors until I got one myself.
Azami, picking Chopper up: If anything ever happened to Chopper, I'd kill everyone in this room and then myself.

@knightinadream group

Kimin, looking in the first aid kit: Why would you fill this thing with Doritos?
Adrian, bleeding out: I thought it was funny at the time.

Maeng: I am decayed, my lungs are full of thorns and mildew, my bones are held otgether by wines. I am fragile. Be gentle with my corpse.
Hyungwon: Get out of bed. You're going to school whether you like it or not.
Maeng: I refuse.

Jack: What's Clifford the big red dog?
Matthew: It's a story about a dog who's loved so much, he gets really big.
Jack, looking at Jaesung: Makes sense.

Basil, in french: You're the most precious bean, I want to keep you forever.
Minwoo: I don't know what that was but fuck you.

Seokju: A pet rock is a fun pet until you realize that it's essentially immortal and you've cursed it to an eternity of watching its loved ones die.
Haeil: Seokju, stop texting me at three in the morning.

@Starfast group

Ara: Maybe I'll just move to Idaho.
Dallas: Idaho?
Ara: Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised?
Dallas: What is there to do in Idaho?
Ara: Exactly. Good luck running into someone you went to high school with in Idaho.

Dallas: You know what's really odd?
Andor: What?
Ara: Numbers not divisible by 2?

Gerard: I am decayed, my lungs are full of thorns and mildew, my bones are held otgether by wines. I am fragile. Be gentle with my corpse.
Adelia: Get out of bed. You're going to work whether you like it or not.
Gerard: I refuse.

Ara, looking in the first aid kit: Why would you fill this thing with Doritos?
Andor, bleeding out: I thought it was funny at the time.

Ara: [comes out of the shower]
Ghost: [writes "YOUR GOING TO DIE" on the mirror]
Ara: [corrects it to "YOU'RE" and leaves]

Taven: Always be positive!
Taven: [falls down the stairs]
Taven: Wow I got down those stairs really fast!

@evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

Beck: Maybe I'll just move to Idaho.
Harper: Idaho?
Beck: Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised?
Harper: What is there to do in Idaho?
Beck: Exactly. Good luck running into someone you went to high school with in Idaho.

Oleander: I am decayed, my lungs are full of thorns and mildew, my bones are held together by vines. I am fragile. Be gentle with my corpse.
Vivian: Get up. You're going to help us whether you like it or not.
Oleander: I refuse.

@knightinadream group

Adrian: So what's your type?
Kimin: Black hair, brown eyes, dumb, high pitch screamer, tall.
Adrian: That kind of sounds like me…
Kimin: Did I mention dumb?
Adrian: Yeah.
Kimin: Okay, just making sure.

Chansung: I can't wait to be an adult!
Haeil: No, you don't. Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

Carmen: I turned out perfectly fine!
Lyz: Babe, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.
Carmen: I DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN!

Jungwoo: When I said you should try being friendlier, this isn't what I meant.
Byungho, stirring a cup of tea passive aggressively: Oh, so now I'm TOO friendly? There's no pleasing you.
Burglar who broke into the apartment an hour ago: Two sugars please.
Byungho: Coming right up.

@evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

Arthur: Maybe I'll just move to Spero.
Louis: Spero?
Arthur: Yes. Why do you sound so surprised?
Louis: What is there to do in Spero?
Arthur: Exactly. Good luck running into someone you grew up with in Spero.

@evastardust groupRRAAAARRL

Gabriel: You can trust me. Let's not forget who pulled you out of the river yesterday.
Georgie: Let's not forget who pushed me in!
Gabriel: Anyways, as I was saying-

Della: If I'm sad, I eat. If I'm angry, I eat. If I'm happy, I eat.
Theo: What if you're tired?
Della: When I'm tired, I take it to bed and eat.

@Yamatsu

Waiter: Sir, I heard you asked for a bottle? Might I suggest Le Château Poignardant?
Gawain: Ah, it's perfect!
Smashes the bottle on the table.
Gawain, holding a shiv and turning to Galahad: So what was that you were saying about MY WIFE?!