forum Personal Venting Chat, New and Improved! (Without Jerks)

Started November 14, 2019 by Deleted user

tune

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It's freaking raining…. Apparently my area just can't catch a break. [Heavy sigh.]

I had another dream that Mir deleted her account while I was asleep and didn't say goodbye. Something else happened too but I can't remember

unfortunate news i am still here
my arms hurt like hell and my eyes feel like they’re made of bees
but i’m here

…i have to write that letter today
i have to tell someone
i’m going to tell someone
and i need y’all to make sure i do
i’m done chickening out
please don’t let me chicken out

I'm so proud of you for telling someone Ella, really!

I had another dream that Mir deleted her account while I was asleep and didn't say goodbye. Something else happened too but I can't remember

d00d you know I'm saying goodbye before I leave

I might have just taken my meds three times
and now I'm kind of freaking out because our pharmacy is closed and I don't know how I'd get more once I run out

THANK YOU FOR REMINDiNG ME ABOUT MY MEDS

DON'T ACCIDENTALLY TAKE THEM THREE FUCKING TIMES

I didn't…
I'm more likely to forget to take them at all then take them three times.

_{oh god what do i write}

Ella? You okay?

_{oh god what do i write}

Just be honest, love. Write what's been going on.

Extra late night pickles is here to say that I had a dream that Eva and I moved into a dorm together and it was fun except it was also scary for some reason. Don't remember what it was

Obviously it wasn't scary because of the reanimated bodies.

but how do i make it feel genuine and convincing
if this goes wrong i’m hopeless-

Pour your heart out my dude. Tell how you're feeling, and be as raw and plain as possible. The letter doesn't have to be poetic or complex. It can be as simple as you want it to be. Of course, these aren't simple emotions to deal with, and finding the right words to express it is hard. Write down what you know. List the emotions and thoughts you know are the problem, and include them in the letter. Assert that you know you need to get professional help. Tell them what you know about your life, your emotions, your thoughts, and what you know about your future. If you want, tell them what you're unsure about. This will help them get on the same page with you, and hopefully help them make informed decisions about your mental health.

if this goes wrong i’m hopeless-

No. If this goes wrong we try again. And again. We don't give up here, Els.

Extra late night pickles is here to say that I had a dream that Eva and I moved into a dorm together and it was fun except it was also scary for some reason. Don't remember what it was

Obviously it wasn't scary because of the reanimated bodies.

I think we were at some camp like either a very relaxed military camp or some kind of theater camp

Extra late night pickles is here to say that I had a dream that Eva and I moved into a dorm together and it was fun except it was also scary for some reason. Don't remember what it was

Obviously it wasn't scary because of the reanimated bodies.

I think we were at some camp like either a very relaxed military camp or some kind of theater camp

Oh wait I go to a theatre camp irl
Don't stay at a dorm since it's by my grandparents' house
But still
Weirdly plausible

Lizzie, I think you should take a break.
And I'd happily help you with that.
You have the NBN squad's numbers. How about sometime soon you try to stay off nb for one day? I would even do it with you. We could hold each other accountable.

I'm trying to only let myself on once an hour for today, and depending on how it goes, I might try to take a day off. It's just really scary and I need to show myself that I wouldn't really miss that much and coming back would be okay, y'know?
And it's not just notebook, I feel like that about my real life too, I just hate it more because I can't control what I miss. With Notebook, I can shut everything out and be on a lot, but irl I'm not invited everywhere, and I can't just be everywhere so I don't miss anything.

ok
got my notes
not turning back

i’ll leave it under her pillow so she only finds it tonight when both of us are able to sit down and talk afterwards without worrying about the siblings

ok
got my notes
not turning back

i’ll leave it under her pillow so she only finds it tonight when both of us are able to sit down and talk afterwards without worrying about the siblings

Good luck <3

Morning. I slept in a half-hour too long and now I'm groggy as shit and barely registering anything.
Fuck.

Mood

I had to wake up like two hours early so we could watch the Livestream for church, and I am exhausted. I didn't sleep hardly at all, was tossing and turning all night, roasting hot (as in literally, not physically), and I just,,,, ughhhh

My birthday is in July and for some reason my parents want a list of things I want for my birthday, so I put together a small list of like Face masks (They really help my skin), a shirt from a company I really like, some rings, and some small stuff and they said "No, what is something you really want" So I showed them an underwater camera I've been looking at, which was like $60, and was planning to buy in a couple weeks when my paycheck came in and when I showed my parents, they went off on me for believing that they were "Made of money" and that I would believe "That we can actually afford stuff that isn't really needed" And, I'm not mad because I'm buying it soon anyways, but it was just weird

Happy vent: Even though I’ve only been conducting for two days, I feel super comfortable with one of the songs she gave us to audition with (albeit it’s Star Spangled Banner, which I’ve been playing since Middle school), and I’m getting slowly aqcuainted with the second with the helpful hand of a metronome, and I’m actually super confident I might have a chance to get this position. I also really enjoy conducting, and even if I don’t get the position of leadership, I know there’ll be other chances for me to conduct as a field assistant.

Though, that’s an excuse for later. Right now, it’s I will get that position. There’s also the helpful tidbit knowing that most of the sophomores in my year either 1) Don’t care 2) Are discouraged from doing it due to the virus or 3) going to a tech school. The third reason is like, the biggest one for me, for someone I thought who wanted it (he’s the brother of the current senior drum major) is going to the tech school. So yes.

I’m gonna be annoying about it until the day I die, I’m sorry. Except I’m not. Deal with it.

I’m at my cousins house and we’re gonna go swimming tonight and make brownies and to with vanilla ice cream which is very delicious! Kinda like old times too

Also my cousins really do make me kinda nervous cuz they judged me for everything and anything when I was younger lmaoo
(they still kinda do but I’m learning to Not Care)
also we might not go swimming cuz rain
It’s alright tho
Also yesterday, I kinda felt good about myself and I just wanna take a moment to appreciate that for me.
Also I love my girlfriend. She’s so fucking awesome

Yes emi! All the band kids who made fun of you can suck it when you get the position :D

On another note… EVERYONE GO TO GOOGLE AND SEARCH “ARE TOM AND JERRY BEST FRIENDS” RIGHT NOW

And I named a pretty important queen after you, Emi

Queen Emi. I like it.