forum Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

Started September 23, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

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"He's a sad biscuit."

"why is that lady wearing a big sombrero"

"You know what D&D is, right?"
With all the seriousness in the world: "Yeah, it's from the Odyssey"
………………freshmen are so dumb

But I was a wee 7th grader when I found out what D&D was…now I'm a freshman finally playing D&D and-
uh…I knocked myself out, I dealt one damage to an ally, and I succeeded on most of my charisma checks!
It was at this momet that Momentia realized that Pact of the Fiend Warlocks are trash, and her entire introduction into D&D was ruined.
-But I'm fine! My character still has her moral decision of patron vs. party, right?
(Oh god I literally sucked at our first session, you have no idea. And yes, I realize I'm nerding out whe probably only one other person her knows about D&D…)

"toaster oven is the best gaming console"
"no the best one is obviously fridge!"
-some kids in my english class

"If I was a girl I'd have big boobs and be really thicc!"
- a guy in my american studies class loud enough for the entire class to hear, including the teacher.

"Hey, is/are there [insert the name of literally anything] in Norway?"

Okay, so no one actually said this, but there are these signs in my school in the restrooms over the sinks and they read: WATER IS NOT FOR DRINKING OR COOKING.

“Let’s get some chicken men in the bushes”

"What is that a peanut fetish or something?"
-My science teacher

I have many things:

“I’m in love with Mr.Elkatanani. It’s only like a 30 year age gap. Besides- I’m almost 14.”

Random girl translation Latin in my class: “…Than she screamed and hurried away.”
Me: “An appropriate reaction- I mean that’s the ancient Roman equivalent of the man in the white van offering you candy!”
-
My friend:“I’ll be the aunt fifty times removed. Ok. Here we go. Hey Sonny, the last time I saw you, you were just a wee little baby! Do you remember me?”
Me: “No. I was a BABY!”
My other friend:“Exactly!”
-
My friend: “I want food!!!!!!”
My teacher: “I have almonds, will you shut up?”
My friend: “YES! Thanks! eats an almond WAIT are these UNSALTED.”
My teacher: “shut UP”
-
“I made friends with the evil crow that’s watching everybody outside.”
-
My friend: “Why is the ground yellow right there in the one spot?”
Me: “the magical leprechaun stood there and then left us.”
My friend: “so sad”
-
Me: “how about we stuff her mouth full of Chill Pills and then duct tape it shut?”
my friend: “yes. She chills or she dies. I totally agree.”
-
My teacher: “why do you have all your stuff on your desk? Is your locker empty? Would it kill you to put your papers IN your binders either? Go sort that in the hallway.”
My friend: “but…”
My teachers: “Zoë Faith Dodson. Go out. Now”
My other friend: “ohhh. The middle name. Same effect as the middle finger.”

“Will the Rose wrap around the hilt or the stabby stabby part?”

"Who's the guy who sat on a spike?"
Sighing "Who?"
"Thomass Jeffowson."
"I hate you."

passes sparkling grape juice "here have the wine. It's for uh "communion""

Downs the rest of a bottle "I know I have a drinking problem!"

"It's not a problem if you admit it"
"You literally just called it a problem"
"Did I?"

"Sorry for awkwardly groping your boob"
"That was my sweatshirt. I don't have boobs" (-me, a female)
"Oh so my slightly gay actions weren't necessary"
"Oof"
"Did you just assume my gender? Wait no. Did you assume my sexuality? I'm a lawn mower. Wait that's not one. You know fish nets? Not like that"

"It's not that you're not straight, it's that your stupid"
"Yeah"

"there's over the counter drugs and under the table drugs"

"The difference between a cigarette and meth is $5,000."
And
"I have a one-Shrek mind."
-My creative writing teacher

"Is this furby reanimation?"
"…..mayhaps."
"We're the modern Prometheuses. Promethei? I'm not sure what the plural of Prometheus is…"
"Promethodes"
"No."

“I told Nolan about my crush on James.”
“Why would you tell Nolan he is the most untrustworthy person EVER.”
“He’s just so small”

"I'm as dumb as a pig."
"You know pigs are actually pretty smart right?"
"… SEE!"

“I’m either gay or I’m dead but please don’t kill me because I’m to young to die.”

"what's your writing style?"
"A fucking mess"

"Our band is called the buttermilk ranch experience"

my mom jokes about me being adopted a lot, I think i might be.-person 1
that's so sad alexia play uptown funk- person 2

"So what character are you cosplaying?"
"…Pit…"
"Called it. Dork."

"I want to cosplay a Tetris block!!!"

"So what character are you cosplaying?"
"…Pit…"
"Called it. Dork."

(Dork Pit?)

"So what character are you cosplaying?"
"…Pit…"
"Called it. Dork."

(Dork Pit?)

Was
Was that a pun

"So what character are you cosplaying?"
"…Pit…"
"Called it. Dork."

(Dork Pit?)

Was
Was that a pun

I…don't know how to feel about that. But it's terribly appropriate, considering like half of the dialogue lmaoo