forum Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

Started September 23, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

Edit topic

“I’m gonna eat Death.”

"Cease and desist, or you will cease to exist!"

We were talking about the guy that played Edgar Allen Poe in our marching band show not being happy cause his family died of tb
My dad: a couple times he was smiling when the girl died
Me: Annabelle Lee is dying. It's working. The poison is kicking in
My dad, not understanding my quality gen z humor: 😕

“If you don’t believe in Santa Claus, I’ll eat your fingers.”
“But I don’t have hands.”

“Ms(insert name of teacher), why does this say a character sniffed drugs?”
“It’s a story idea for creative writing.”
“Do you do drugs?”
“No.”

diddly dum diddly dee in gonna break your heccin knees - kind in my first hour

“The next person who tries to convince me to read Homestuck is getting their teeth stolen.”

doing chicken arms and baby voice
"I'm a conservative"
a few seconds later
"Get it? Liberal. Liberate the Mexicans" laughs at own joke

Boy in my math class: I’m having issues with the fractions and finding the y-intercept
My friend: I’m having issues with the fact that I exist

Same friend: [Math teacher], I’m sure you’ll like Peppa Pig eventually
Math teacher: Probably not. That’s a definite no

“Murder spaghetti Jesus born”

“[Band teacher] is a calculator”

“Congratulations, you are a heathen”

while giving me her glue stick “That’s mine”

“If I had to eat a rat, I would cook it so hard.”

"At my old school in Florida, some kid got stabbed and we still have our backpacks" -the same kid that said he got arrested for having Adderall at said school

"Hey, try not to look so dead inside when your playing G major scale." -my orchestra classmate.

“If you get arrested I’m going to take a picture and leave.”
“Not even a hello?”

"You know what D&D is, right?"
With all the seriousness in the world: "Yeah, it's from the Odyssey"
………………freshmen are so dumb

Student: makes joe mama joke
Teacher: "If y'all don't shut up, I'm gonna call joe mama."

Student: makes joe mama joke
Teacher: "If y'all don't shut up, I'm gonna call joe mama."

That’s a teacher I want, what an amazing teacher.

in southern accent "MY MEEMAW MAKES THE BEST MASH POTATOES. YOU CAN FIGHT ME IN THE MUD PIT IF YOU DISAGREE."

in southern accent "MY MEEMAW MAKES THE BEST MASH POTATOES. YOU CAN FIGHT ME IN THE MUD PIT IF YOU DISAGREE."

I’m aware you’re probably making fun of the south but that’s literally been said to me unironically But ‘grammy’ instead of Meehaw

in southern accent "MY MEEMAW MAKES THE BEST MASH POTATOES. YOU CAN FIGHT ME IN THE MUD PIT IF YOU DISAGREE."

I’m aware you’re probably making fun of the south but that’s literally been said to me unironically But ‘grammy’ instead of Meehaw

wait seriously XD

in southern accent "MY MEEMAW MAKES THE BEST MASH POTATOES. YOU CAN FIGHT ME IN THE MUD PIT IF YOU DISAGREE."

I’m aware you’re probably making fun of the south but that’s literally been said to me unironically But ‘grammy’ instead of Meehaw

wait seriously XD

Yea we were at camp and the potatoes sucked so we were talking about them and this dude said pretty much that exact thing

Student: makes joe mama joke
Teacher: "If y'all don't shut up, I'm gonna call joe mama."

That’s a teacher I want, what an amazing teacher.

She's a boomer who's more knowledgeable about modern things than the millennial teacher.

"It pooped on me!"
"Put the chinchilla away before it pees on the computer"

"It's a knee slapper?" slaps knee "Ow!"

laying on desk sadly "my teeth aren't straight*

student starts to sit down
other student straight up punches first student's butt
second student is now repeatedly flicking first student's back

loses an arm wrestling match
"wow I turned to talk to someone and my arm just went fwump"
"aren't you in rotc? how are you going to defend our nation if you lose an arm wrestle?"
"oh shit you're right"

"Heads up! China's voting for the communists again."
"here we go…"

“He was only president for two years? Laaaame.”
“He got shot!”

“THE BIRDS WANT TO DUEL.”

“Let me get chu some bumbly bees.”

“So do you want them like this?” draws a giant circle on Autodesk Sketch

“As thick as you can make it.”

(All of them are me)

"Bro, we don't ask why my nipples are so far apart, we only ask how."

"[Enter male student name] wants to make out with Mr.[enter teacher name]"

"I have the confidence of a goldfish"