forum Your personal venting space.

Started January 17, 2019 by @The-N-U-T-Cracker

tune

I'm not even sick like wtf

@Caustic-Fraust-Is-Lonely maybe you ate something that was bad?

No I think I had a migraine

No I think I had a migraine

Oh oof. Hope you feel better!

Thank. I've literally only been to work three times, and two times out of three I've thrown up

I don't like that record

Caustic, maybe you should see a doctor?

hisses at your workplace
Did you drink enough water?

Idk man. I've been making an effort to drink more water, but I guess there's still a decent chance I'm dehydrated

@Caustic-Fraust-Is-Lonely I'm not a doctor but I'm giving you a prescription
1) Drink water!!!!! It doesn't have to be all at once. You can go slow with it. But you just threw up so you definitely need to hydrate yourself
2) Try to eat something small. Not too unhealthy or where it might make your stomach upset. I recommend bread. Of course, you're at work rn so you might have to wait. But once you get off, eat a little bit (not too much)
3) Idk how much longer you have to work (hopefully not too long) but once you get home, take a nap. Your body heals itself when it's sleeping
4) Tell. Your. Boss. If you're sick they'll send you home

I got a water bottle that has time marks on the side to help with my water drinking because I used to get horrible migraines everyday from dehydration and it really helped.

Yeah I'm already at home. I don't have access to notebook at work, Although I wish I did. Thanks for the tips though

I got a water bottle that has time marks on the side to help with my water drinking because I used to get horrible migraines everyday from dehydration and it really helped.

That's pretty neat where can I buy one

I’ve been finding it increasingly harder to take care of myself. I’ve forgotten to eat for a whole day, I’ve been forgetting to take my antidepressants, I’ve been laying around, I’ve been letting the one friend i have left drift away. I just can’t find the motivation to do anything. I can’t tell if this is all just my depression, or if I just broken.

I’ve been finding it increasingly harder to take care of myself. I’ve forgotten to eat for a whole day, I’ve been forgetting to take my antidepressants, I’ve been laying around, I’ve been letting the one friend i have left drift away. I just can’t find the motivation to do anything. I can’t tell if this is all just my depression, or if I just broken.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I wish I could help. I hope you find the motivation to get back on track soon uwu

I’ve been finding it increasingly harder to take care of myself. I’ve forgotten to eat for a whole day, I’ve been forgetting to take my antidepressants, I’ve been laying around, I’ve been letting the one friend i have left drift away. I just can’t find the motivation to do anything. I can’t tell if this is all just my depression, or if I just broken.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I wish I could help. I hope you find the motivation to get back on track soon uwu

Thanks fam. I’m working on it

So. I complained about my brother earlier too but I'm doing it once more bc he just did something again. We were just hanging out and I showed him all of my plants (I consider them my pets, so they mean a lot to me) and he suddenly got all snarky?? And he took one that I had just finished repotting (it was my favorite fern) and he "accidentally" dropped it. He practically threw it! And I said hey you have to buy me a new pot and help me clean up, right? Well, he was like "It's not my fault, bitch" and then left and slammed my door.
Also, keep in mind that we're not your average siblings. We were actually polite and somewhat nice to each other growing up. So obviously this is a shock-
On top of that, he's been acting super passive-aggressive and playing the victim ALL DAY _{he's acting too much like our biological father and I don't think I can take it for much longer-}

I hate myself so much because I feel like a really shitty person s lot of the time. I feel like I’m being selfish with everything. And when I get into those moods where my heart hurts physically and the self-hatred is enough to make me seek some kind of release, I feel guilty. I feel guilty like I don’t have any right to feel this way, guilty when I can’t bring myself to be present and responsive, guilty when I want to talk about it with a friend. I feel like I’d be fine if I just tried harder. If I just tried harder, I would work through it, walk it off, just get over it and everything would be fine.
I’m starting to feel like my life lacks purpose, again. How do I find the motivation to continue on if there’s no point? What does it matter?

I’ve been finding it increasingly harder to take care of myself. I’ve forgotten to eat for a whole day, I’ve been forgetting to take my antidepressants, I’ve been laying around, I’ve been letting the one friend i have left drift away. I just can’t find the motivation to do anything. I can’t tell if this is all just my depression, or if I just broken.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I wish I could help. I hope you find the motivation to get back on track soon uwu

Thanks fam. I’m working on it

Hey you! I can help remind you to do all that if needed!

I hate myself so much because I feel like a really shitty person s lot of the time. I feel like I’m being selfish with everything. And when I get into those moods where my heart hurts physically and the self-hatred is enough to make me seek some kind of release, I feel guilty. I feel guilty like I don’t have any right to feel this way, guilty when I can’t bring myself to be present and responsive, guilty when I want to talk about it with a friend. I feel like I’d be fine if I just tried harder. If I just tried harder, I would work through it, walk it off, just get over it and everything would be fine.
I’m starting to feel like my life lacks purpose, again. How do I find the motivation to continue on if there’s no point? What does it matter?

Hey! What about your loved ones?
Have you finished your book or a project you wanna do?
What about the little things in life that you enjoy?

Today is my brother and sisters birthday. They died minutes after birth 15 years to this day. It’s really hard. I may be younger but this just tears my parents apart and it’s so hard to watch.

Oh I'm sorry to hear that

Today is my brother and sisters birthday. They died minutes after birth 15 years to this day. It’s really hard. I may be younger but this just tears my parents apart and it’s so hard to watch.

oh no, i'm so sorry, i'm here if you need it always <3

aw man I'm sorry hugs

Thank you!

Dear everyone,
If I talk about someone a lot, it doesn't mean I like them. It means they're fascinatingly dumb and I'm telling you stories about them because I have to talk to you and don't have anything else to say. And I thought you'd be entertained

I got a water bottle that has time marks on the side to help with my water drinking because I used to get horrible migraines everyday from dehydration and it really helped.

That's pretty neat where can I buy one

https://us.healthish.com/products/wb-1

Thank you uwu

Some context:
I’m doing this show called Once on This Island. It’s tech week. For those of you who don’t know that’s the week before the show. We have super long, mandatory rehearsals (like 4 1/2 hours for this one) and we run the show onstage with costumes, mics, set, lights, and stuff

I play a villager for most of the show, but for Mama Will Provide I’m a breeze and I’m part of the heart ensemble for The Human Heart. For Mama Will Provide I have these wrist things with ribbons hanging down and for Human Heart I have these red armbands. (II wear these with my villager costume)

At the end of rehearsal last night I pinned my breeze things and heart things together and put them on the prop table so I would know they were mine and they wouldn’t get lost. Now you can probably guess where this is going

So before we ran the show there was a pair of heart armbands that someone left and the director asked who’s they were. No one claimed them.
Then we’re told to go backstage to check if we have all our props

Guess what’s not on the prop table
My breeze and heart things

Ok, this is just awesome. Act 1 goes by fine. Then we have a 5 minute break for intermission. Then the first song after intermission is Mama Will Provide (after that is a scene with Ti Moune and Daniel and then Human Heart). I still don’t have my things. Awesome, wow. (Yes that was intentional.) Well there weren’t enough breeze things so we had to share and a couple of us only had one (we were supposed to have two, one on each wrist.)

So I’m waiting (for life to begiiiiiiiiiiiiin)(jk) in the wing about to go on for Mama Will Provide, trying not to cry. I know I was overreacting, but I was really stressed about this. We do the song. I smiled, but I felt like people could tell it was fake

Then after the song there’s this scene between Ti Moune and Daniel before Human Heart. Still no heart armbands. Again: awesome, wow. So I have to go onstage without them. I’m the only one without them, so I know people noticed.

So yeah that was awesome. And I still don’t know what happened to my costume pieces. And I know they’re going to say something about it during notes tomorrow. Sorry it’s super long

Problem solved!
They had them on the prop table so I just took some, pinned them together like I had them before, and hid them behind a basket

pro tip: don't roller skate dissociated. it's a dumb choice.
_{also i want a joint and/or alcohol(the latter being plausible) but rian's folks are up still and this body isn't legal… ack}