dumb vent but fuck i didn't know writing a car crash was so hard
100% valid because it is!
thx yo
how do i even describe the broken windshield bits on the pavement in an artsy way, like i'm a slut for weird imagery but i got nothing
"cruel jewelry" is all i got but that sounds like shit
"Shattered pieces of a once, sturdy barrier, the barrier between pleasantry and tragedy."?
You two are tooo kiinnndd. I love you boootthhh
I’m gunna fake it till I make it now. Ima gunna end up super cool! And actually like myself!
Nah it’s ok Shuri. I wrote it here and I was already feeling better. After I stress ate a bowl of cereal I felt ok. About this whole toxic thing.
Good on you!
Toxic, you are definitely not toxic!
Well, I mean, you are toxic, that’s your username, but your attitude/personality isn’t toxic. You’re just so extremely wholesome and I absolutely adore you-
dumb vent but fuck i didn't know writing a car crash was so hard
100% valid because it is!
thx yo
how do i even describe the broken windshield bits on the pavement in an artsy way, like i'm a slut for weird imagery but i got nothing
"cruel jewelry" is all i got but that sounds like shit"Shattered pieces of a once, sturdy barrier, the barrier between pleasantry and tragedy."?
k that would be so cool in a poem but i can't afford to be that dramatic yet. but thanks for ur suggestion anyway kdfnjgk
You two are tooo kiinnndd. I love you boootthhh
I’m gunna fake it till I make it now. Ima gunna end up super cool! And actually like myself!
Nah it’s ok Shuri. I wrote it here and I was already feeling better. After I stress ate a bowl of cereal I felt ok. About this whole toxic thing.
<33
Toxic, you are definitely not toxic!
Well, I mean, you are toxic, that’s your username, but your attitude/personality isn’t toxic. You’re just so extremely wholesome and I absolutely adore you-
Thankssssssss
@Shuri
"There was a sudden blood-red squeal, and two of the cars that drove by them collided with a shockingly loud sound. One of the cars careened and fell, crushing the windshield. Glass shards spilled on the pavement and around the boys’ feet in bitter offering. The driver of the other car stared through the window at the wreckage, hands white on the steering wheel, then swerved brusquely and left the scene, leaving his bumper behind, along with his humanity."
dumb vent but fuck i didn't know writing a car crash was so hard
100% valid because it is!
thx yo
how do i even describe the broken windshield bits on the pavement in an artsy way, like i'm a slut for weird imagery but i got nothing
"cruel jewelry" is all i got but that sounds like shit"Shattered pieces of a once, sturdy barrier, the barrier between pleasantry and tragedy."?
k that would be so cool in a poem but i can't afford to be that dramatic yet. but thanks for ur suggestion anyway kdfnjgk
“The shards glittered as if diamonds thrown from a hand, ragged and malicious in the light.” How bout dat?
dumb vent but fuck i didn't know writing a car crash was so hard
100% valid because it is!
thx yo
how do i even describe the broken windshield bits on the pavement in an artsy way, like i'm a slut for weird imagery but i got nothing
"cruel jewelry" is all i got but that sounds like shit"Shattered pieces of a once, sturdy barrier, the barrier between pleasantry and tragedy."?
k that would be so cool in a poem but i can't afford to be that dramatic yet. but thanks for ur suggestion anyway kdfnjgk
“The shards glittered as if diamonds thrown from a hand, ragged and malicious in the light.” How bout dat?
the ragged and malicious thing is awesome. i posted the bit above
Ya done good!
Ya done good!
thank you! is the bitter offering bit distracting from the action? cuz i'm not gna keep it if it takes away from the action
I feel like I have no friends anymore. I used to have a decent sized friend group but we all sort of split apart. I used to be really close to one friend in particular. we used to always facetime like every day. But then things changed. it was really my fault. she came to me about real problems and I didn't have an answer. Plus I was being pretty annoying at the time by ranting about random stuff which was what we used to do. I found out she was complaining about me with out other friends. that's when I stopped enjoying face timing her. we used to be able to face time for hours and not say a word but the comfortable silents turned awkward. or at least it did for me. so I would answer her face times talk for a few minutes and then make up some excuse to hang up. she confronted me about this and I just basically said sorry and told her that it just felt awkward and different now for no reason. She was the only friend I had who I could actually talk to. I haven't talked to her in months but every time I feel the need to rant or I feel upset my immediate instinct is to call her but I cant. I only really have a few friends left and I can't talk about anything personal with them. it either comes out awkward or I'm scared they'll just make fun of me or take it as a joke.
people change. sometimes you become incompatible with others as you grow up, and you gotta split. that's alright, it happens. you'll make new friends, trust me.
Ya done good!
thank you! is the bitter offering bit distracting from the action? cuz i'm not gna keep it if it takes away from the action
I think it is alright though a bit of revising might be best just so it fits the mood/tone better.
I feel like I have no friends anymore. I used to have a decent sized friend group but we all sort of split apart. I used to be really close to one friend in particular. we used to always facetime like every day. But then things changed. it was really my fault. she came to me about real problems and I didn't have an answer. Plus I was being pretty annoying at the time by ranting about random stuff which was what we used to do. I found out she was complaining about me with out other friends. that's when I stopped enjoying face timing her. we used to be able to face time for hours and not say a word but the comfortable silents turned awkward. or at least it did for me. so I would answer her face times talk for a few minutes and then make up some excuse to hang up. she confronted me about this and I just basically said sorry and told her that it just felt awkward and different now for no reason. She was the only friend I had who I could actually talk to. I haven't talked to her in months but every time I feel the need to rant or I feel upset my immediate instinct is to call her but I cant. I only really have a few friends left and I can't talk about anything personal with them. it either comes out awkward or I'm scared they'll just make fun of me or take it as a joke.
It’s alright… that’s what I went through too. Trust me when I say eventually it’ll get better and you’ll find the one or two friends that work the best with you. I may have pushed people away but I did find good friends who stubbornly refuse to let me be alone and push them away.
Ya done good!
thank you! is the bitter offering bit distracting from the action? cuz i'm not gna keep it if it takes away from the action
I think it is alright though a bit of revising might be best just so it fits the mood/tone better.
any specific pointers?
people change. sometimes you become incompatible with others as you grow up, and you gotta split. that's alright, it happens. you'll make new friends, trust me.
^^^^^^^
Also, I know how that feels, fam, and YK up here is right. Sometimes you grow and your tastes change.
Ya done good!
thank you! is the bitter offering bit distracting from the action? cuz i'm not gna keep it if it takes away from the action
I think it is alright though a bit of revising might be best just so it fits the mood/tone better.
any specific pointers?
I’d say go through and change the wording just a bit. Do you know how to turn passive voice into active voice?
Ya done good!
thank you! is the bitter offering bit distracting from the action? cuz i'm not gna keep it if it takes away from the action
I think it is alright though a bit of revising might be best just so it fits the mood/tone better.
any specific pointers?
I’d say go through and change the wording just a bit. Do you know how to turn passive voice into active voice?
oh, yeah
thanks!
wait where's the passive voice, i'm not finding it
This chat is so positive rn!
This chat is so positive rn!
yeah <3
You guys wanna read some gay fluff?
You guys wanna read some gay fluff?
hella
I posted this on the Happiness chat but whatevs!
CHAPTER 1: An Interrupted Picnic
Watan stood, patiently waiting, atop the knoll where he and his best friend would often sit, a small basket, woven from reeds, and very full, in his hand.
His other hand, lay lazily on his hip, a small blanket snug in the crook of his elbow. He sighed, exasperated, shifting his weight to his other leg.
He looked over the port-town of Fawrs, his home ever since he was little.
Small, bustling, full of crop-rich farms, trim stables, workshops, stores, and many a street-stand.
A hangar for the aircraft, with sliding sheetmetal doors, and steel-plated roof lay to the East, and a secure-looking, lsvish marina to the North, for the watercraft. To the South, right before him, were the aforementioned farms. A few watchtowers dotted the outskirts, mostly to the West. It smelled of rich, warm, damp soil and mortar.
He let out another sigh, as his name was called, by a sensitive, slightly whiny voice.
“H-how long have you been here?” Siegfried inquired, loudly, making his way up the knoll.
“Thirty minutes.” Watan pretend-deadpanned.
“I'm… So sorry, the Headmage held me back for extra lessons.” Siegfried stammered, coming in for a hug.
He wrapped his arms around the other boy. He had Siegfried beat by half a head in height, maybe a stone in weight. Siegfried buried his head in the other's neck.
“It's not like you to fall behind, especially in magecraft.” Watan pointed out. They broke apart.
“N-not behind… Ahead.” The smaller boy replied. “And, uhm how are you doing with technology classes?” He asked, shyly, averting the other's eyes.
“I, well, didn't go.” Watan acknowledged, waiting for tge other's reaction. Siegfried looked as if he were going to extend a hand, but withdrew it.
“Watan, you should've gone.” He chided, huffing with exasperation.
“I know, but I'm also ahead, so why not take a day off?” He set the basket down, waving Siegfried to the side to lay out the blanket.
He patted it down, and set the basket in the middle, before sprawling out on part of the blanket, feet crossed, and hands behind his head.
“T-that mentality might just be the death of you.” Siegfried responded, crawling onto the blanket and took a seat, neatly.
“Still here, aren't I?” The taller boy retorted, playfully.
Silence, save for tge sound of tge breeze whipping through the thick grass.
Siegfried digressed.
“So what's in your basket?” He peered at it, oddly.
“Oh.” Watan flicked it open, revealing thick, supple slices of bread, and some drippings, as well as two small white packages, and a bundle of leeks.
He reached for a piece of bread, as did the other, and they smeared the drippings on them, in silence.
Two pairs of blue eyes, Watan's like gas-flames, and Siegfried's like the sky, or sea, or maybe crystals.
“So um?” The smaller boy stammered.
“Go on.” Watan nudges.
“Those two packages?”
“Open one and see!”
Silence.
Siegfried hesitantly reaches, and opens one up, the white paper crinkles as he sets it into the basket.
“Honey tarts!?!” Siegfried joyfully collapses on Watan. “You sly fiend!” He takes a small bite, relishing the sweet, savory taste.
“I figured they were your favorite!” Watan flicks him lightly on the forehead.
“You figured well!” Siegfried said, starting to drop his meek demeanor.
A whirring sound caught their attention, and they glanced off towards one of Fawrs's outer roads.
It was a jeep, much like the one the Vulkyrian military issued Watan's father. With long, sturdy military-grade axels, large tires, and a sturdy, low-to-the ground body. Poking out from it's back end, was a long, clunky turret, with a purple lense at the end. The driver could hardly if at all be seen. The turret was un-manned, as the jeep was in the vicinity of the town.
“Mercenaries?” The boys said, in unison, looking at each other once more. Puzzled.
wait where's the passive voice, i'm not finding it
Ah I just went back and read it and found that I had read it wrong. XD
Jk jk. Good job! It sounds good and coherent. I, on the other hand, am dumb.
wait where's the passive voice, i'm not finding it
Ah I just went back and read it and found that I had read it wrong. XD
Jk jk. Good job! It sounds good and coherent. I, on the other hand, am dumb.
oh lmao
thank you, and ur not dumb
wait where's the passive voice, i'm not finding it
Ah I just went back and read it and found that I had read it wrong. XD
Jk jk. Good job! It sounds good and coherent. I, on the other hand, am dumb.
oh lmao
thank you, and ur not dumb
Why thank
i got through the nastier part of the story and fuck it turned out good but now i'm not in a good mood at all i wish i wasn't so hyperempathetic
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