(in baby voice) STWAAAAABEWWYIES?

LEO ATE BACON

“Tax evasion”

"But….it's BLUE"

“Grown women would kill for that hair”

"I TOLD YOU I DON'T SPEAK GIGGLES!!!"

"Carpet Mountain"

Laptops are heavy

"Ten points for anyone who understood THAT yawnese"

"sure would be a shame…"

(simply, the inside joke i have is one line)

"Potato"
(and there's also-)
"Dave"
(well that's not really an inside joke but it's a better way to refer to one of my friends without revealing their name)

(oh yeah i forgot)
"izzy the 69th"

"Rachel, stop plotting murder in the corner and pretend you like us."

"nougot stop being a thot and get the fluffing hell over here"

"oh, that's alec. they're probably plotting world domination or something."

"Run for president so your running slogan can be "Hah, gay."

BADP!!!

"I thought that llama was a goose"
"that's a deer"

"No shit, Sherlock"
"Fuck you Watson."

"Pizza"

me: yelling "You don't have to be lonely…."
random person: "At farmers only dot com"
friend: laughing their ass off "what the hell just happened"

DR. SEUSS IS D A D D Y

"I'm just straight up, not having a good time."

"tis an oof my child"
"CHICKEN NUGGET DRAGON PRINCE TYSON!!!!"

dnag

oorms

/me no pulse

Salmon

i must ooze le Pidge