Hi! I am a non-cis person, about to write a gender-fluid character! I want to be able to write my character accurately and effectively. Could someone help me with that? I want to make sure that I get it right because that community deserves accuracy, not a character built on stereotypes and inaccuracy.
Help on anything from a parent-to-child relationship, to how it feels in the day to day life would be helpful. I know that this is a very personal question, but it would be really helpful if you are willing to share.
I'm genderfluid but I'm not out yet so I can't help you in regards to relationships
I find that a lot of the time I'm in a kind of grey area where I don't feel one way or another. It's very rare that it's black and white. I don't think I've had a day where I'm like "ah yes I am of the female variety today".
I can usually tell when it shifts though. In particular, there are subtle behaviours that you would pertain to masculine/feminine people that I adopt for a period of time.
Personally, I find it difficult to label myself one way or another. And of course it's different for everyone. For me, I rarely feel very feminine and I'm more likely to feel masculine.
In day to day life it can be confusing sometimes. It's not just saying "I'm a guy today". It's being that gender. When something comes up where you have to choose between male and female it can be so confusing and also difficult. I remember once on an app I had to choose between male or female and I sat there for a good five minutes unable to choose because I was very in-between at the time. You know what you are and when someone challenges that or doesn't acknowledge that it can be uncomfortable and mildly irritating (I can't speak though cos I don't have the guts to come out in the first place so people don't even know)
I think what's most important to understand is, you don't change as a person when you shift genders. For me, I have slight behavioral differences that people wouldn't pick up on.
It also doesn't swing dramatically from one thing to the next. Sometimes it clicks that you're one thing but most of the time it kind of just slides around.
That's all I can think of at the moment