i'm def gonna come back with more of these, thank you for showing me this generator haha
(also it's def gonna be easier to post on the incorrect quotes thread now that i have some quotes generated for me XD)
Well, never knew this existed, and these are rather interesting and amusing
Ragnor: Imruck… Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?
Imruck: Your note on the table told me to Satanize the house before you returned.
Ragnor: …..I wrote sanitize
Once again Ragnor and a few creatures he takes care of in the 'wildlife' reserve (his wildlife is fantasy creatures/beasts):
Eve: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste
Ragnor: We got spring water
Blight: with EXTRA minerals
Ragnor: it's like licking a stalagmite
Eve: DON'T COME HOME.
Blight: Mmmmm cave water
Moony, to Ena: My life is in the hands of an idiot!
Ena, motioning to themself and Shep: No no no no no, TWO idiots!
Moony: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.
Ena: The cow???
Shep: Ena, W H Y?
Moony, negotiating with Ena: We have Shep. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed
Shep: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars?
Shep: MAKE IT ONE MILLION–
Moony: SHEP STOP
Moony: I trust Ena.
Shep: You think they know what they're doing?
Moony: I wouldn't go that far.
Store Worker: Would a Mx. Moony please come to the front desk?
Moony, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?
Store Worker: points to Ena and Shep
Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?
Ena and Shep, simultaneously: We got lost :(
Moony: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-
The squad is having dinner together
Moony: Ena, can you pass the salt?
Ena: Throws Shep across the table
(I love it when they pull from content creators I watch, like Markiplier, Unus Annus (rip) and Thomas Sanders)
Reese: I want to be a caterpillar.
Reese: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.
Sage: You know those things have a lifespan of like, two days, right?
Reese: That's another highlight.
Ethan: rEESE nO-
Sage: If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same.
Minnie, w/ her mouth full of cheetos from across the room: KILL TWO
Minnie: How you holdin' up, Ethan?
Ethan: I am a festive pinata and God is a thirteen-year-old boy with a stick whose parents just announced their divorce.
Minnie: Same tbh
Sage: Are you throwing stones at my window? You know we both have phones, right??
Minnie: Shoot, yeah you're right.
Sage: did yOU JUST THROW YOUR PHONE AT MY F*CKING WINDOW????
Moony: What do you think Ena will do for a distraction?
Shep: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
Building explodes and several car alarms go off
Shep: … or they could do that.
Moony, driving Ena and Shep: So how was your day?
Ena: We almost got surprise adopted!
Shep: We almost got kidnapped.
Moony: Oh, okay.
Moony: slams on the breaks WAIT WHAT?!
Kace: A theif.
Kelly: I before E, except after C.
Owen: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
Noah: How am I supposed to know?
Elijah: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Noah: You wouldn't be trapped.
Lord Hydrus: I think we're missing something.
Lady Tempest: Teamwork?
Lady Gaia: Cohesion?
Lord Inferno: A general sense of what we’re doing?
Serro: Yo is Sigma sleeping or dead?
Amos: Hopefully dead, I hated their guts.
Naberius: Yeah, so did I.
Sigma: Okay first of all, fuck you-
WHY IS THIS IN CHARACTER?! It works so well!!!
Cixin: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.
Sebastian: You're like 15 years old
Cixin: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!
Cixin: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE
Sebastian: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially
Cixin, desperately, as Sebastian bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Sebastian: Oh! B positive.
Cixin: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE
The squad is trying to con some random guy
Sebastian: Um, Cixin, why are you pretending I'm this guy's family?
Cixin: We need money!
Sebastian: You're scamming him?
Cixin: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him?
Sebastian: What?! No way!
Cixin: Why not? We already stole Akilah!
Akilah: Hey guys
Sebastian: No, we didn't. Akilah can think and talk for herself, she can do whatever she wants!
Akilah: I wanna steal
Sebastian: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold?
Cixin: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.
Akilah: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.
Cixin: Good thinking.
Akilah: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited
Cixin: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and they might not even die.
oh man it's sdc time
Kakyoin and Jotaro skipping stones on lake
Kakyoin: It’s such a beautiful evening.
Jotaro, whispering: Take that you fucking lake
Kakyoin: Gets down on one knee
Jotaro: Oh my god, it’s finally happening.
Kakyoin: Falls over
Jotaro: The poison is kicking in.
Kakyoin: What’s something you guys are better than Jotaro at?
Joseph: Mario Kart.
Avdol: Yeah, video games.
Polnareff: Emotional vulnerability.
Kakyoin: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.
Jotaro: … Your what?
Kakyoin: My friends.
Joseph: Are they saying “friends”?
Avdol: I think they're being sarcastic.
Polnareff: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Kakyoin! All of your friends are in this room.
Kakyoin: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.
Kakyoin: Good morning.
Jotaro: Good morning.
Avdol: Good morning.
Joseph: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.
Polnareff: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS
Kakyoin: Favorite horror movie?
Polnareff: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics
(As the creator of the original Incorrect Quotes chat, this is the best thing I've seen this week-)
The squad is over at Nich's house
Samuel: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?
Nich: … N-No…
Nich, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???
Samuel, motioning to their kitchen: Three, I thought!
Jon: I see a-
Nich, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.
Samuel: Oh, well I-
Nich: Hey wait wait, actually- hang on- fiddles with the buttons on the microwave
Nich, amazed: Its got a bake setting!
Therese: Ohoho, you learn something new every day!
Nell: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?
Nich: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!
Nich: I am someone who owns four ovens…
Nich, louder and way too happy: I am someone… who owns FOUR OVENS…
Nich: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens…
Margot, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!
Samuel: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!
Nich, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS
Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’
Nich: Thanks fam!
Samuel: oh no
Jon: cries I love you too
Therese: Sounds fake but okay
Nell: A flustered mess
Margot: can i get a refund
Nich: Dumbest scar stories, go!
Samuel: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.
Jon: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.
Therese: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.
Nell: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.
Margot: I have emotional scars.
Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’
Addie: Thanks fam!
Eliot: oh no
Imogen: cries I love you too
Kels: Sounds fake but okay
Kay: A flustered mess
Tabitha: can i get a refund
Jackson: Everyone, synchronize your watches.
Geneva: I don’t know how to do that.
Henry: I don’t wear a watch.
Victor: Time is a construct.
Jackson: Victor isn’t answering their phone
Henry: I’ll call
Jackson: Geneva and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Ozzie: I think Sybil was right.
Freddy: I'm surprised they haven't marched in here to say 'I told you so.'
Vera: They wouldn't do that.
Sybil: You're right, Vera. For once in your life, you're 100% right. I would never say that.
Sybil: turns around, the shirt they're wearing says 'Sybil Told You So' on the back
Vera: Why are Ozzie and Freddy sitting with their backs to each other?
Sybil: They had a fight.
Vera: Then why are they holding hands?
Sybil: They get sad when they fight.
Oberon: Are you sure this is the right direction?
Robin: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!
Titania: In that case, we're definitely lost.
Oberon: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste
Robin: We got spring water
Titania: with EXTRA minerals
Robin: it's like licking a stalagmite
Oberon: DON'T COME HOME.
Titania: Mmmmm cave water
Oberon: WHY. why did you give Titania a KNIFE?!
Robin: I’m sorry. They said they felt unsafe.
Oberon: Now I feel unsafe!
Robin: I’m sorry.
Robin: … would you like a knife?
Oberon: I trust Robin.
Titania: You think they know what they're doing?
Oberon: I wouldn't go that far.
Oberon: What did you do with Titania's body?
Robin: What didn’t I do with the body?
Robin: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.
Oberon: While I’m gone, Robin, you’re in charge.
Oberon, whispering: Titania, you’re secretly in charge.
Oberon: What do you think Robin will do for a distraction?
Titania: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
Building explodes and several car alarms go off
Titania: … or they could do that.
I honestly see some of these scenarios happening between certain characters of mine, and tis amusing
Amos: Watching the news Someone tried to fight a squid at the aquarium today!
Sigma: walks in covered with ink Well, maybe the squid was being a dick.
Eliam: So are we flirting right now?
Lady Sheliak: I AM LITERALLY STABBING YOU
Eliam: That doesn’t answer my question
Einar: What’s up guys? I’m back.
Takumi: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die.
Einar: Death is a social construct.
Okay, but like most of these are accurate as hell
Fenris: Gavin… How do I begin to explain Gavin?
Crimson: Gavin is flawless.
Hayden: I hear their hair's insured for $10,000.
Lena: I hear they do car commercials… in Japan.
Griffin: One time they punched me in the face… it was awesome.
Fenris: Rules are made to be broken.
Gavin: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.
Syrus: Uh, piñatas.
Goldy: Glow sticks.
Winter: Karate boards.
Scarlett: Spaghetti when you have a small pot.
Fenris, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Fenris: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Scarlett: We were out of Doritos.
Fenris: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?
Gavin: >:O language
Crimson: Yeah watch your fucking language
Hayden: OKAY WHO TAUGHT CRIMSON THE FUCK WORD?
Lena: 'The fuck word'.
Griffin: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time
Crimson: Oh my god they censored it
Lena: Say fuck, Griffin.
Crimson: Do it, Griffin. Say fuck.
Rin: I know you snuck out last night, Tobio.
Alastor: Play dumb!
Tobio: Who's Tobio?
Alastor: NOT THAT DUMB!!!
Rin, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Tobio: You did WHAT–
Alastor: William Snakepeare
Rin: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold?
Tobio: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.
Alastor: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.
Tobio: Good thinking.
Rin: HELP! I TOLD ALASTOR I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!
Tobio, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
Shroom: 'Person of interest' is almost too flattering.
Shroom: Like, if the police were to pound on my door and go, 'A man has been murdered in your building and you are a person of interest,' I'd be like, 'Moi? Oh, do go on.'
Shroom: Died and came back as a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.
Shroom: Three words. Say them and I'm yours.
Carrot: Three words.
Myles: Jail is no fun, I'll tell you that much.
Discord: Oh, you've been?
Myles: Once. In monopoly.
Myles, watching the news: Someone tried to fight a squid at the aquarium today!
Discord: covered in ink Well, maybe the squid was being a dick.
Visie: You saved me. I owe you my life.
Aklas: signing in ASL No thanks, I've seen it and I'm not very impressed.
Visie: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated!
Aklas: signing Killed without hesitation.
Myles: WHAT'S YOUR TYPE?!
Discord: Anyone, honestly, but nerds especially..
Myles, as Discord bleeds out: YOUR BlOoD tYpE!
Discord: Oh, B positive.
Myles: DON'T TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BlOoD tYpE!!!
Shroom: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Carrot: You’re a hazard to society
Lemon: And a coward. DO TWENTY.
Carrot: You have to apologize to Shroom
Lemon: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
Shroom: You often use humor to deflect trauma
Lemon: Thank you
Shroom: I didn't say that was a good thing
Lemon: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny
Fenton: Okay, truth or dare?
Fenton: How many hours have you slept this week?
Fenton: Go to bed.
Gyro: I don’t like this game.
Gyro: I went through an entire character arc during quarantine
Gyro: I became more evil if you’re curious
Fenton: We're still in quarantine, don't worry, there's time for a redemption arc still!
Gyro: I’m going to get worse on purpose
Fenton: Welcome, fellow idiots
Gyro: Hello, Fenton
Fenton: No, no, not you, you're not an idiot
Gyro: You underestimate me
Gyro: Screams louder to assert dominance
Huey: Should we do something?!
Boyd, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.
Fenton: I just ended a four-year relationship.
Gyro: Oh, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?
Fenton: Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine. It wasn’t my relationship.
Huey and Boyd are fighting from across the room
Fenton: While I’m gone, Gyro, you’re in charge.
Fenton, whispering: Huey, you’re secretly in charge.
Fenton: Are you sure this is the right direction?
Gyro: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!
Huey: In that case, we're definitely lost.
Minnie: They may be idiots but-
Random citizen: My life is in the hands of an idiot??
Minnie: Nonononono- fOUr idiots.
Minnie: Oh! I have a Brita filter!
Sage: No, WE have a Brita filter- dO NOT PEE IN OUR BRITA FILTER, MINNIE
Reese: Ugh, I have no friends.
Ethan: bITCH WHAT AM I, A RoAcH?
Reese: We need to talk about your immaturity.
Minnie, having just shoved Ethan off of the couch: Bold words for someone who's standing in lava
Ethan: Hey, how do you like your coffee?
Reese: As dark and bitter as my soul.
Ethan: Aight, one glass of milk, coming right up
lol this genorator is perfect for my main six
Aisha: Tonight, one of you will betray us.
Lila: Is it me, Aisha?
Aisha: No, it’s not you.
Amber: Is it me, Aisha?
Aisha: It’s not you either.
Chaos: Is it me, Aisha?
Aisha, mockingly: Is IT mE AiShA?
Chaos: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world!
Lila: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment.
Amber: More or less, I guess…
Alice: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that!
Foxglove: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept.
Aisha: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!
Lila: Just be yourself.
Aisha: 'Be myself'? Lila, I have one day to win Hannah over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?
Amber: Couple weeks.
Alice: Six months.
Chaos: Jury’s still out.
Aisha: See, Lila?
Aisha: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?
Lila: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?
Chaos: Nope, absolutely not.
Amber: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.
Aisha: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.
Alice: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.
Foxglove: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.
Amber: We need to distract these guys
Alice: Leave it to me
Alice: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.
Aisha, Chaos, and Foxglove: Immediately begin arguing
Lila, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.
Aisha, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Aisha: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Chaos: We were out of Doritos.
Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker
Aisha: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
Amber: …I did. I broke it.
Aisha: No. No you didn't. Lila?
Lila: Don't look at me. Look at Foxglove.
Foxglove: What?! I didn't break it.
Lila: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Foxglove: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
Foxglove: No, it's not!
Alice: If it matters, probably not, but Chaos was the last one to use it.
Chaos: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Alice: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Chaos: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Alice!
Amber: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Aisha.
Aisha: No! Who broke it!?
Alice: Aisha… Lila's been awfully quiet.
Everyone starts arguing
Aisha, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.
Aisha: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Aisha: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
p e r f e c t l y f i t s t h e m
Abbacchio: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Giorno: Several traffic violations.
Mista: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Narancia: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Bruno: Also, that’s not our car.
Abbacchio: Where's Giorno, Mista, and Narancia?
Bruno: They're playing hide and seek.
Bruno: I don't think you get how this game works.
Bruno: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?
Giorno: Have everyone stand.
Mista: Bring three more chairs!
Narancia: The most important ones can sit down.
Abbacchio: Kill three.
Abbacchio, walking into his house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Abbacchio: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Trish: We were out of Doritos.
Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker
Abbacchio: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
Giorno: …I did. I broke it.
Abbacchio: No. No you didn't. Mista?
Mista: Don't look at me. Look at Narancia.
Narancia: What?! I didn't break it.
Mista: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Narancia: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
Narancia: No, it's not!
Bruno: If it matters, probably not, but Trish was the last one to use it.
Trish: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Bruno: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Trish: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Bruno!
Giorno: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Abbacchio.
Abbacchio: No! Who broke it!?
Bruno: Abbacchio… Mista's been awfully quiet.
Everyone starts arguing
Abbacchio, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.
Abbacchio: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Abbacchio: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
okay i love this so
Juniper: Schrödinger’s cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that’s both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.
Frog: Whaddya call a fish with no eye?
Juniper, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons
Juniper, tending to Dick's wounds: How would you rate your pain?
Dick: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.
[juniper's not really this mean i just thought it was funny]
Alex: If you had to choose between Dick and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Juniper: That depends, how much money are we taking about?
Alex: 63 cents.
Juniper: I'll take the money.
Frog: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?
Juniper: I'm a knife.
Dick, from across the room: They're the little spoon.
Shiloh: Why are your tongues purple?
Dick: We had slushies. I had a blue one.
Juniper: I had a red one.
Frog: You drank each other's slushies?