forum c r i t i q u e m y c h a r a c t e r !
Started by elle.rose
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elle.rose

This is Quinn, and he's part of this four person group in what I'm working out to be a sci-fi setting. Before I go ahead and start on the others, I want to make sure I've got the right dynamic for him, so give me some constructive criticism, I'm all for it! His height and weight are probably not right, I suck at measurements. Also if you can think of a last name, please share, I'm at a blank for him!
I hope you like him: Quinn

Natalie

Starting off, I think you have an AMAZING dynamic! The first thing anyone needs to know when writing a part o part of a group is that they all need to be uniquely them, and I think you're on the right track.
When you say he's "Cocky but not a jerk", do you mean he jokes around? If so, this is a great idea! There needs to be a positive character in everything. He can definitely be someone who looks at the best and is slightly annoying because of it. I love the idea of him being nicely cocky! Those are my favorite kind of characters! I always imagine them smirking and laughing while people swat at them! GAH! I'm already loving this character!
Haha! And with the skinny thing, I think the word you're looking for is a skronny giant (I have no idea how to spell that word, can you tell?).
I would use his "stiff posture when worried" very wisely. Maybe he knows something bad that they don't and doesn't want to break the news but they know something is wrong. Also, when he's adressed, I would love if he were a bit humorous with his boss(?). Humor is a powerful tool that helps the reader connect easily. Also with wanting a place in the universe, maybe this is why he cracks jokes. Maybe he's trying to stick out in his own kind of way. When wanting to live life to it's fullest, he can be the one to get the team into trouble, which makes as an amazing plot twist and edge-of-seat-grabber.
I don't think you need to add the flaw of greed. Change it to him wanting to be giving; the positivity and joking is enough:)
I think his hobby should be having adventures! He sounds like a little kid and would be so fun to see on a mission! Maybe he's all about the mission life! Before that maybe do a sport of sometime he likes to brag about! Maybe he has a cool trick he learned with a soccer ball??
I love his personality type!!
He seems pretty dedicated to the mission. But I don't know your story so this probably doesn't help much with the occupation part…
Maybe ask the question as to Why he likes Cats? I'm a bit lost there
I love his education section!!!

With his background, ask as many question as you possibly can! Use the
-where
-what
-why
-when
-how
The more questions the better;)
Also, really imagine yourself as the character in his past to really understand what he's been through and why he acts the way he does;)

He sounds like an AMAZING character! He kind of reminds me of a character you could read about for the help! His name is Puck and is in the Iron King series by Julie Kagawa - reading books ALWAYS helps me!!! Maybe try it out;)
Also, watch as many movies and read as many books as you can that sounds a bit like your idea! You might be scared that you'll copy ideas, but you wont! It helps you get ideas that are uniquely yours, and you won't have to worry about this problem if you see/read a large number of them!

Hope this helps;)
~Natalie F

elle.rose

Wow, thanks so much for such a thorough critique- I'm so glad and relieved that I'm going in the right direction. I was hoping to be able to figure out some stuff about the story after knowing that Quinn is good, and you definitely helped me with that! Also I agree with the greed part-
it didn't quite fit him, I felt, and I'll be going back to straighten that out in a bit. And I'll be sure to check out that book series- I was looking for something new to read anyway ; ) Thanks a ton for your critiques Natalie!