i'm gonna start keeping track of my 'incorrect character quotes' here
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Hazel: i'm hungry
Tyler, still in an apron: i fed you
Yaedin, only slightly embarrassing himself in front of Akito and being the over-dramatic prince he is: hang me in the square!
Noah, injured: are you a licensed physician?
Emma, a real doctor that's too tired to validate herself: i have a red hat
Vorex, holding Apophis:
a concerned Tyler: did you steal that? did you steal this baby?
Akito: you're valid
Claudia: i teared up when you said that but thank you, you're valid too
Takeo, inspecting a picture: that looks like it's from… world war two? that's cool
Akito, looking at the corner watermark: actually it's from memecentre.com
the squad being bombed:
Carmen, yelling at a late Noah: where the hell were you?!
Noah, screaming back: i was doing the laundry!!
Cedrix: my biggest inspiration is myself
Zavis: *adjusts tie which makes it worse *
Zavis: *looks slightly confused and does it again *
Zavis: *succeeds in fixing it and smiles *
Tyler: thanos is poor *throws hat *
Saraia: *faints from overworking herself *
a distressed Nomius: mA'aM aRe YoU aLrIgHt ?!?!
Nomius, lifting an angry Vorex: this is my friend!
the squad all geared up with their guns 'nd stuff investigating a thing:
Akito: *walks through metal detector *
Akito: it didn't go off i think i know how they got in
Brad, Akito and Noah all distracted by a funky mirror: :0
Carmen: don't tase each other!
Brad, tasering the rest of the team: YOU'RE ALL MY BITCHES
Akito: knock knock
Akito: *begins to blow up/shoot everything *
Takeo: you brought a 40mm grenade launcher to what is basically a hostage situation?
Akito: yeah!
Takeo: what the fuck is wrong with you
Switch: *glitching out *
Cedrix: *smacks Switch *
Cedrix: just hit 'em once and they'll reset
Takeo: what's your weapon Akito?
Akito, in childish glee: i have a flamethrower!!!
Takeo: oh god
Akito, singing: the hills are alive with the sounds of- *flame thrower noises *
Yaedin: i'm digging a tunnel using the power of my mind
a random guard: evidently it's not gonna be a very large tunnel then
Death: don't set me on fire
Akito, knowing he can't kill death: *sets him on fire *
Akito: SORRY WHAT?
Akito: I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY FLAMETHROWER
Claudia: let go of my hand
Hazel: you will love me
Tyler: stop holding my hand
Hazel: no
Carmen: we're kind of missing something guys
Takeo: cohesion? teamwork? a general sense of what we're doing?
Noah: and the bomb is not here
Takeo: oh, and that yeah
Hannah: who. the fuck. dropped. the bomb?
Life: uh, are you alright?
Death, with an arrow in his head: i've got a bit of a headache
Saraia: we are gathered here today… to remember Vorex-
Vorex: are you doing my eulogy !?!
Vorex: I'M NOT DEAD YET YOU MOTHERFUCKER
Saraia, louder: wHO WAS KILLED IN AN UNFORTUNATE ACCIDENT-
Hazel: my fingers smell of pretzel it's making me hungry
Tyler: haven't you just eaten the pretzel?
Hazel: yes
Justin: then how are you still hungry?
Death: you guys ok?
Time: not bad, yourself?
Death: yeah you wanna come play?
Time: yeah can do
Time: you up for it Space?
Space: *deep ascending noises *
Death: i think that means yes
Time: once he's phased into being
( honestly here's the part of the video i got this from it's much funnier there- https://youtu.be/SKxx8v8SxW8?t=573 )
Emma, scared of something: i am running, I AM RUNNING
Emma: DO YOU SEE ME RUNNING?
Emma: MY LEGS ARE MOVING
Saraia: i hate you like your parents hate you
Nomius and Vorex, not knowing their parents: :(
Death: how are you feeling right now?
Life: you know the same as always
Life: i just wanna die
Tyler: i don't like you anymore :(
Hazel: i never liked you anyway
Tyler: ok :'(
Saraia: do we have an 'ethically wrong bell'?
Cedrix: if we had an 'ethically wrong bell' it would always be ringing
Cedrix and Saraia, having a nice conversation:
Switch, in the distance: we need more buckets!
Cedrix: wait, did we leave Switch alone with the bucket machine?
Cedrix, running to where he is and finding a mountain of buckets: oh for fuck sake Switch! stop with the buckets we have enough!!
Saraia: i need to borrow your bucket for a sec
Switch: you want a bucket? :D
Saraia: no no no, i just need one
Brad: shh
Akito: shhhh
Noah: sh
Brad: we are going to impose Zen upon this team
Brad: wait guys-
Akito and Noah aggressively shushing each other: shhh SHHH SHH SHHH-
Brad: sHUT THE FUCK UP I'M TRYING TO IMPOSE ZEN YOU DUMB BITCH
Tyler: Hey, how y'all-
Vorex: [weird snarling noises]
Tyler: AAAAA GET YOUR FUCKIN DOG, BITCH!!!
Saraia: It don't bite
Tyler: [being bitten] YES IT DO-
Vorex: [taps over]
Apophis: Daddy?
Vorex: Do I look-
*big explosion *
Emma: do you think they're ok?
Emma: i'll heal that first-
Hannah: Emma… Emma, i think he's beyond saving to be honest
Emma, still trying to heal the burnt crispy body: do you think?
Hannah: yeah…
Zavis: i've become a worm
Zavis: run away
Zavis: *awkwardly squiggles away *
Brad, injured: i need a medic!
Brad: help me out medic
Emma, jokingly: do you have insurance?
Noah, who accidentally lost all his weapons: i don't have a gun but i have my fists
Noah: and i will start punching-
Akito, who accidentally threw a grenade at Noah: shit, bad 'nade!
Akito: Noah run !!
[ explosion ]
Noah: i'm alive ! :D
Neo: have we ever succeeded this mission?
Friend: have we ever succeeded with any mission?
Noah: *leaves a trail a flares behind them *
Brad: they will surely not know we are coming
Noah: i'm just leaving a trail so we can find home
Noah: hansel and gretel tactics
Hazel: *sings terribly *
Tyler: *sings really well *
Hazel: he learnt how to sing from me-
(ok so at this point i'm watching someone play a horror game but they're giving me gold so here we go-)
Yaedin, terrified: we're fine we're fine
Yaedin: i'm sure there's-
[ everything starts shaking ominously ]
Yaedin: -nOTHING WRONG
[ big mysterious screech in the distance ]
Vorex: . . . it's just the wind
Neo: *smashes someone's head in *
Neo, to the corpse: good day
Nomius: it takes more than a silly jump scare to scare me!
[ something jumps at him ]
Nomius: oH NO NO NO DON'T COME FOR ME-
Nomius: I'm not normally a scaredy-cat
[ thud noise ]
Nomius: oh god i am a scaredy-cat-
Nomius: i'm completely immune to freaking out-
[ eXPLOSION ]
Nomius: AAAAAAHHHHH *freaks out *
Akito: smoke bomb!! let's try it out and see what it does
Akito: probably makes smoke
Vorex, trying to escape the lab: *runs through the hallways *
Saraia: i saw that
Vorex, still running: no you didn't. you didn't see anything.
Apophis: *hiding under a table *
Saraia, right beside that exact table: you can't hide from me
Apophis: *snorts quietly *
Vorex, accidentally stepping in a puddle: it's just water
Vorex, looking down at it: . . . that's not water
Hazel: your eyes are hella red, you been smoking?
Vorex: no, i've been crying, leave me alone
Nomius, looking at something weird: scientist, please explain
Saraia, drunk: noot noot
Nomius: thank you scientist
Yaedin, after catching the flowers at a wedding, running to Akito: loOK! I CAUGHT THE FLOWERS-
Tyler, quietly in the background: throw it back-
Akito: i don't know how this is going to go, but rest assured, i'm very very bad under pressure
Carmen: who's driving?
Takeo: i'm driving
Carmen: ok, Noah what are you doing?
Noah: i have no clue
Hannah: who's throwing bombs at them?!
Akito: *laughing guiltily *
Noah: maybe we can actually like…
Brad: formulate a strategy?
Akito: actually have a plan?
Vorex, to Saraia: can you stop talking to me like i'm a cat?
Cedrix: the disease is gone
Zavis: my son is going to be okay?
Cedrix, proceeding to kidnap baby Vorex: i just told you he is gone
the bird squad passing any river at all:
Tatius: this is a river of my tears
Carmen, about Akito: and he almost died three times again!!
Claudia, worried: again?!
Akito: you should work with me!
Claudia: i'm trying to actually get stuff done
Akito: you shouldn't work with me!
Zavis: you sent me a challenge? you're a coward for not saying it to my face!
Dagiia: it's a Christmas card you idiot
Tatius, who is not from ancient Greece: it's rough being anybody from ancient Greece
Time, right before he's killed by Nothing: someone's gonna kill you eventually and it might as well be someone you know
Zavis, approaching Vorex:
Carmen, who has adopted Vorex, quietly to herself: if you hurt my son-
Zavis, revealed to be Vorex's dad:
Carmen: . . . if you hurt your son-
Dagiia, trying to write a poem: she was poetry, but he couldn't read-
Noah, interrupting him: -his name was jarred he's nineteen
Akito, from the closet: when his parents built a very strange machine
Brad, in the distance: watch that scene dig in the dancing queen
a drunk Saraia: aaaay macarena
Hazel, standing on books to try and be taller: and now i'm 6 foot-
Claudia: i don't think you are yet though
Tyler: we need another book !! he has another book-
Yaedin: nOt ThE bIbLe-
Hazel: i cannot stand on the bible-
Noah, Akito and Brad doing anything, very loudly:
Hannah: they've only got one brain cell between the three of them
Noah, very seriously to Brad: mate, nothing beats Bob The Builder
Noah: starts singing the bob the builder song
Saraia, very unconvincingly: i love emotions. i have them all the time.
Takeo: -between me and Tatius?
Akito: yes
Takeo: oh, we're full on in love, we're getting married- where is he?
Akito: oh? :0
Takeo: whERE'S MY HUSBAND?-
Yaedin: time sensitive question, how flirt boy?
Takeo: throw rocks at he
Akito: hot dogs
Tatius: kill him
Yaedin: thanks guys
Hazel: there can be only one sunshine
Justin: … looks at Tyler
Justin: … tries to kill the actual sun instead
Akito: can me and Claudia play outside?
Carmen: whatever, i'm not your mother
[ Akito and Claudia run off ]
Carmen: nOT IN THE STREET-
Nomius: everything is going to be alright
Vorex: how can you say that?
Nomius: because sometimes when things get tough, denial is all we have
Zavis: hAS ANYONE SEEN MY WIFE?
Death: what does she look like?
Zavis, crying: SHE'S B E A U T I F U L
Neo: ok, how many states are there in America?
Nomius: nine !
Neo: no-
Vorex: NO THERE'S EIGHT BECAUSE PLUTO ISN'T A THING ANYMORE-
Neo: wha- no…
Saraia, to Nomius and Vorex: if i still had the receipt, i'd return you
Cedrix: i have a perfect memory! name one time i forgot something!
Vorex: you left me in a walmart parking lot like three weeks ago
Cedrix: i did that on purpose, try again
Emma: words ending in 'ie' are so cute! like, cutie, sweetie, cookie-
Tatius: die
Emma: no-
Life: wait a minute! you don't go TOWARDS the weird scary sound!
Death: yeah we do. we always do.
Life: i hate that about us
Claudia: do you have a plan to get us out of here alive?
Akito: sort of. the idea starts with "run for it" and generally goes downhill from there
Nomius: alright, does everyone have a weapon?
Apophis: Vorex doesn't have a weapon
Vorex: i AM the weapon
Nomius: everything is going to be alright
Vorex: how can you say that?
Nomius: because sometimes when things get tough, denial is all we have
Brad: jail's no fun
Akito: you've been in jail?
Brad: once, in monopoly
Carmen, answering a phone: hello?
Brad: it's Brad
Carmen: what did he do this time?
Brad: no, it's me, Brad. it's actually me.
Carmen: what did you do this time
Hazel: we have two bounty hunters and a hacker
Tyler: [gets caught]
Hazel: we have one bounty hunter and a hacker
Justin: [also gets caught]
Hazel: we have a hacker
Tatius: I don't wanna die here
Takeo: you will not die, we are birds we do not die-
Tatius: [dies]
Cedrix: let's fight like gentlemen, let's have a sword fight
Cedrix: [pulls out gun and shoots the person immediately]
Akito: put the engine in reverse!
Takeo: this doesn't have an engine it's a sailboat you moron!
Brad: which way is starboard?
Noah: we should have gone to pirate school
Hazel: i didn't know we could climb that, maybe we could-
Justin: formulate a strategy?
Tyler: actually have a plan?
Cedrix: there are no rules in this world, just expectations that have punishments for not meeting them.
Saraia: I swear to void- Stop. Murdering. Everyone. we've been over this
Hazel: i'm just a lil idiot with my fists unthreateningly raised at all times
Hannah: try not to get shot
Brad: that's good advice
Hannah: i know, i give the best advice-
Brad: [gets shot]
Hannah: ... you idiot
Cedrix: [walks into the room]
Vorex: my hate is immeasurable and my day is ruined
Tyler: yes i have WAP
Tyler: Wasted Academic Potential
Vorex: i hate when people are like "so tell me about yourself"
Vorex: what do want? like, my trauma, or my favorite color? be specific
Cedrix: are you alright? you didn't sleep at all last night
Saraia: i got a solid 8 minutes
Cedrix: ...
Saraia: not consecutively, but it's fine. you're not even that blurry