Alright, I'm gonna rant using code names for anonymity purposes.
So there's this girl, who for the purposes of this rant will be named Rose. Rose has been my friend for about seven years.
There's also Skywalker, who I've had a crush on for over a year, and I recently started dating him. We broke up a bit ago, and I still have feelings for him. About a week later, Rose told me that Skywalker had been cheating on me. I believed her. Turns out she was flat-out lying to me. I'm really mad at her, but I'm still trying to be friends with her, because she's the friend I've had for the longest (Other than one of my other friends, who for today's purposes will be known as Godzilla.) and I don't want that to be over. I've heard from a lot of people that she's really toxic and not really the most honest person, but I don't want to throw away a seven-year long friendship.
Now we put that on the back burner for a little bit.
I flirt with a ton of people, one hundred percent platonically. I have a friend, who I shall call Fish. (I don't know, I couldn't think of anything else.) Fish and I flirt back and forth all the time, but it's always platonic. Then a couple of days ago, I was flirting (like I normally do) and he asked me out.
I assumed that he meant it in a platonic way. Apparently he did not.
We went to a cookie shop place and then the library, and it really didn't feel like a date. It literally just felt like a hangout. It was cool.
Yesterday, he asked if I wanted to go with him to our local soda place. He never used the word "date" or anything, so I just assumed that it was gonna be a hangout thing, nothing romantic.
Then in the car, on the way to the library, he called me his girlfriend. AND HE SAID "I LOVE YOU"
One, Like I said earlier, I still very much have feelings for Skywalker.
Two, even if I didn't, it is WAY too soon for that.
Three, I don't think I even like Fish in a romantic way.
Anyway, fast forward to today, and Rose asked me if I wanted to go bowling with her and her friends. I already have plans with my other friend, Sweetened Citrus Drink (You know who you are) but they aren't until 5, and bowling would be a good way to get out of going out with Fish again, and like I said. I'm still trying to be friends with her.
Until Rose suggested that I invite Fish. Which I did not. That would be weird.
But I genuinely don't know what to do about any of this, so… Yep!
How are y'all doing?