forum Share things nobody asked you to share

Started June 15, 2020 by @Knight-Shives group

tune

I scream very loudly when startled and then just pretend nothing happened (It gets awkward fast). RIP my mom's ears

Whatever startled me is getting a full rush attack. I have a fight charge attack. It'll come in handy if I have kids lol. Just someone tries to assault me expecting me to step back and go AHHHHH I do go AHHHHH but it’s forward with a dropped shoulder and a knife coming outta the boot. It’s the ultimate reaction.

Is Elden Ring just Dark Souls Skyrim

Yes, I would say it is. And from the people I know who have played it, there is a vague difference between Dark Souls and Elden Ring

Trying to keep my horse alive in BOTW is difficult for no reason ;-;

im on spring break, which im very happy about :D

Im pretty sure i have developed an obsessive hyperfixation with the bad writing of High Guardian Spice, reason why i am now very much motivated to start rewriting it and make a storyboard of the whole 12 episodes and beyond.
Right now im tryina work out how to keep Snap's gender confusion after making him a fae shifter kind of creature (he got a spooky side now uwahaha) - which kinda resulted in him refusing to use his true form to fight because its scary and hes a soft boy, reason why his family thinks hes a weirdo/failure.
any thoughts??

I had to write a story in english, someone PLEASE read it..im dying to know if its good or not…I made a 25/50 on it..but my friends say it makes them cry.

https://www.notebook.ai/documents/143647

warning - this does not have a happy ending.

I have three problems with it. And this is coming from someone who has to write stories and film reviews at least 3 times a week. Alright. First thing I’m going to ask is can you redo it? A 50 is not a great grade. I don’t think it’s worth a 50, I would say a 65 to a 70 but not a 50.

1. You repeat sentences frequently. It looks like you were struggling to hit a word count, they say the same thing, but reworded.
2. Your sentence structure and grammar aren’t good. I’m going to be honest. It’s not the worst, but it isn’t the best. There’s few misspelled words, but sometimes the context isn’t there. You mention a fire, but you contradict yourself on how it started. There’s 2 different ways. There’s a lot of contradictions.
3. You really don’t need to add names of the people or the cat. Leave it in mystery. Less details add more mystery and leave the reader wanting a little more. The reader doesn’t need to know. It’s irrelevant. Being slammed with details gets aggravating and it gets boring reading descriptions over and over again. And the fact that you seemingly have the cat teleport from place to place such as the cat walking away from the house, to suddenly being on the bed, and you try to write in the past and in the present. That is really awkward and is rarely done well.
   Heck man, I’m in college and I get absolutely destroyed on trying to merge past, present, and future scenes in writing. If you rewrite it, I would love to see the rewrite! It’s an interesting little story. It just needs a stronger structure, better formatting, and more context and less awkwardness.
   Happy writing!

I have three problems with it. And this is coming from someone who has to write stories and film reviews at least 3 times a week. Alright. First thing I’m going to ask is can you redo it? A 50 is not a great grade. I don’t think it’s worth a 50, I would say a 65 to a 70 but not a 50.

1. You repeat sentences frequently. It looks like you were struggling to hit a word count, they say the same thing, but reworded.
2. Your sentence structure and grammar aren’t good. I’m going to be honest. It’s not the worst, but it isn’t the best. There’s few misspelled words, but sometimes the context isn’t there. You mention a fire, but you contradict yourself on how it started. There’s 2 different ways. There’s a lot of contradictions.
3. You really don’t need to add names of the people or the cat. Leave it in mystery. Less details add more mystery and leave the reader wanting a little more. The reader doesn’t need to know. It’s irrelevant. Being slammed with details gets aggravating and it gets boring reading descriptions over and over again. And the fact that you seemingly have the cat teleport from place to place such as the cat walking away from the house, to suddenly being on the bed, and you try to write in the past and in the present. That is really awkward and is rarely done well.
   Heck man, I’m in college and I get absolutely destroyed on trying to merge past, present, and future scenes in writing. If you rewrite it, I would love to see the rewrite! It’s an interesting little story. It just needs a stronger structure, better formatting, and more context and less awkwardness.
   Happy writing!

Thank you! I am not going to argue with you, although the misspelling is google autocorrect's fault. I probably need to work on my transition from past to present, but I thought I only put one way the fire started- Granted, I did change it from being on the first floor to being on the second floor. Anyway, thanks for your input ^-^

No problemo fam. This is what career I’m spending an outrageous amount of money on 😂

I had to write a story in english, someone PLEASE read it..im dying to know if its good or not…I made a 25/50 on it..but my friends say it makes them cry.

https://www.notebook.ai/documents/143647

warning - this does not have a happy ending.

I agree with Winter, it needs serious editing; but the spirit of the story is there, and I can tell why your friends cried.

My rollerblades have only tried to kill me twice today!

My rollerblades have only tried to kill me twice today!

Take them to court

I am addicted to writing dystopian short stories for no reason

I'm pretty sure my bird said a racial slur and idk where he heard it- He usually just mimics phone notifications, dog toys, or just says Hi and stuff like a normal bird would.

hey does anyone have any tips on adhering to a self-set writing deadline for someone who is notorious for struggling with deadlines?

Maybe break it into smaller goals and reward yourself after you hit each goal. Set aside some time every day to work on your writing (if possible). Maybe set a timer for each session. Also, make sure your deadline is realistic and you have plenty of time to eat, sleep, and take care of yourself, don't push yourself too hard <3
Eliminate distractions like social media, tv, etc.
A lot of people suggest writing first thing in the morning but do whatever works best for you.
It might also be a good idea to have a friend check up on you and hold you accountable to your deadline.
You've probably heard all of that before, but I hope it helps!

actually for whatever reason i had not thought of the timer thing! i'll have to try it. thanks, Space!

Yeah the timer thing is pretty cool. I use the timer and some headspace music. I use an app called Portal. You can download it for free and it’s very good at chilling you out and keeping you focused.

hm, is it available on like a chrome book?

Idk but I can give u a website that’s like that! And it is available on chrome book!

Here u go!
https://mynoise.net/

ooh i'll check it out! thanks

Here’s another one:
https://lifeat.io/

Listening to instrumental movie soundtracks helps too!

ooh i love doing that :)
Dune's soundtrack is AWESOME

I had to write a story in english, someone PLEASE read it..im dying to know if its good or not…I made a 25/50 on it..but my friends say it makes them cry.

https://www.notebook.ai/documents/143647

warning - this does not have a happy ending.

I agree with Winter, it needs serious editing; but the spirit of the story is there, and I can tell why your friends cried.

Yeah, I wrote it in a bit of a half-arsed rush at first. and changed a lot.

Listening to instrumental movie soundtracks helps too!

cough Tron Legacy cough

I'm pretty sure my bird said a racial slur and idk where he heard it- He usually just mimics phone notifications, dog toys, or just says Hi and stuff like a normal bird would.

Mcscuse me what 😂